Now that the gang’s all here.

Way back in March I introduced you to Penny and Amy ( I know cos’ I just checked), the two newest members of our household, and possibly the two most likely to upset the oldest member.  (

Since then time has rolled on, Oscar has survived his confrontations ( Oscar’s Blog) and decided discretion is the order of the day, meaning he’s discreet in pretending they just don’t exist then he’ s not expected to deal with them.

Oscar is of course our cat. He’s 17 years old now and every bit the dignified old man but a complete wuss and in need of constant attention.  The two later members to join us were Penny and Amy, two beautiful, no you can’t say ‘urgh’ like that, they are beautiful fancy RATS. As I explained back then the names were chosen from the leading female lights on the brilliant TV comedy The Big Bang Theory. Penny the girl who knows it all and is very savvy and Amy who is much more introspective. Penny would try anything while Amy has a long think first and then refuses.

Times have changed. Penny is still the extrovert, very loving and who loves to venture outside the cage. Amy is still the introvert who prefers her sanctum but can be coerced out sometimes. It’s the internal mechanism that’s altered as Amy now rules the roost ( no, there are no chickens, it’s a metaphor). Penny will tease Amy and chase her tail but should Amy turn and place her paw on Penny down she goes. Flat on her back and totally subservient. She even gives up food and for Penny that’s saying a lot.    I’m thinking it’s starting to mirror real life since that’s what I have to do as well.

This week a new pet store opened nearby. Julia loves animals so any excuse to buy food or new toys is not to be missed. And the decision she made that we should visit was because we needed a new water bottle. Stupidly it didn’t occur to me to point out that we have two pet stores closer who stock them. I’m not sure what the argument would have been even if I had mentioned it because clearly this new store is different- it actually sells pets.

We arrived about 10.00am intending to get what was needed than drop into a favourite cafe for a latte. ( In case you’ve read my books, it’s called ‘Are you tempted’ and the staff are great so I love going. Anytime you want directions let me know). Look, I know I’m naive so there’s no reason to rub it in. It took approximately 3 minutes to collect what we needed , half  a moment more for Ju to suggest we “Just look round while we’re here” and a lifetime of regret for what followed. Firstly Julia took me to see the fish. I looked. Then as sternly as I could I said “No. Not a chance. The tank is full and we’re not starting another”.                                                                                                          “Yes dear” she replied. Then she took me to the cages. Rabbits, guinea pigs and hamsters. Very sweet and entertaining but I confess not something I get sentimental about. We moved on and she didn’t utter a word until we reached the cage with the degus. I think these are the pet of the minute and to be honest I thought them really cute.  “Oh wouldn’t it be nice to have one Dear” she said. ” Not a cat in hells chance my love ” I promptly replied, ” anyway they live in social groups so it would have to be two at least and then there’s the cage etc.”   “I suppose you’re right Dear” she told me which should have set alarm bells ringing but didn’t. So lastly to the rats, and there she was a cute little baby rat with big ears staring up at us while she ate her breakfast. “Bernadette” said Julia. “What?” said I.                                                                                                                                     “You know dear, the third mouseketeer. Penny, Amy and Bernadette. Just like on the programme. And she’s so small, just like the tiny wildebeest on the Serengeti Amy called her.”

So, we got the water bottle, some food, a pet carrier and a new pet rat to carry in it. There are four boys in the programme too, Sheldon, Leonard, Howard and Rajesh. I have my foot firmly planted on the ground now. NO, NO, NO. There’s no room for more rats and imagine if they breed into more Big Bang characters. Julia will have to content herself with an all female group.

Say hello to Bernadette ( Bernie).

Me fighting for food with Penny.




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43 responses to “Now that the gang’s all here.


    Keep ’em coming . . . your stories brighten my day even on the Sunniest of days!

    Best of wishes for you and Julia and your gang,


  2. Thank you Michael. I’m glad you enjoy them. I try to bring a smile, even if it’s just to the lips of the shop assistants who see my wallet coming. Thanks for the best wishes, the gang return them with interest and in the case of Penny, Amy and now Bernadette, with a few doyly chewed edges. Have a good week.
    David.(let’s cut the formality.)

    • Hello David,

      Thank you for your kind words. Are you prepared for the LONDON OLYMPICS? I wish I could be there, but I will be praying for all the good people of the great United Kingdom.

      Best regards,

      • Thank you Michael. I think the nearest thing that the London Olympics will affect me with is anything that happens in Cardiff’s Millenium Stadium.Most of the action will take place in England and will be just viewed on TV by me. Of course it’s a great honour to host the Olympics again and I’m hoping all the British teams manage golds ( ha ha) and that London enjoys a great atmosphere with it’s many visitors.Everybody is Welcome.

  3. Catherine Johnson

    Great story, David. I love The big bang Theory. It’s great you’ve named your pets after them.

    • It’s years since made a beeline for the TV to specifically watch a programme. But between 6pm and 7pm is sacrosanct now even though I’ve seen the episodes before. There’s always some nuance or brilliant facial expression I’ve missed before.And honestly Catherine, the girls are so growing into their parts.

  4. Oh Daud! Daft is not the word :p Pet shops must be avoided at all times and when you do visit you must wear a blind-fold and ear-muffs. In fact it would probably be better to get one of those long sticks with pincers at the end. Simply poke the stick in the shop with a note on the end. Follow that up with money and then take your purchases and RUN!

    As a current member in good standing of Petshops Anonymous I can attest to the truth of what I say!

    My only advice now is to tie yourself to that wagon and hang on for dear life because you /know/ that 7 is a fatal number!

    • Thanks for the sound advice Andrea. What I really need are lessons in women’s guile so that I know what to expect next or so I can spot the warning signs when I enter a shop in time for me to grab my credit card and run. In the meantime I’ll go shopping for the blindfold and ear muffs today.

  5. A third RAT???? Don’t you have any consideration for Sir Oscar’s feelings? And to add insult to injury, what is he going to say when he sees this picture with you kissing Penny? Kissing a RAT? I am speechless with indignation on his behalf.

    • Lady J thinks Oscar is very adaptable to new friends Ilil. This really means she’ll get them whatever the excuse. But for the sake of my skin next time it’s in contact with Oscar’s claws, let me point out I was NOT kissing Penny. We were actually doing battle over the last of my breakfast toast.She’d had hers but decided since I still had a little left she’d adopt it despite the fact it was not yet orphaned. She won !

      • Ha! That’s what they all say when the Superior Cat catches them kissing a RODENT. “We are just good friends… I was just sharing food, dear…” Sure…

  6. Good Morning David,
    I will be watching the Teley, more for seeing the BEAUTIFUL City Of London, and the surrounding areas, but I join you in praying for your British Athletes to Take the Gold! I will Pray that your great Scotland Yard, Metropolitan Police and Military will keep EVRYONE Safe, as I am confident they will.

    Now, Ilil Arbel and Acflory, I am certain Sir Oscar feels like a “Big” brother to the little girls, and he knows, he is the MAN of the House, and he must let you provide for them.

    Have a great Monday and stay well,


    • Good Morning Mike, thank you for the ‘rose tinted glasses’ look at London which I’m sure will polish up nicely for the events. It’s always nice when the home team score a victory but I’m sure victory will be well deserved by whoever gets it. All I really want is to see the whole thing pass off without any trouble. No threats to competitors no threats to the public and no threats to the fabric of London itself, the wonderful buildings. I know the security forces will do their utmost to protect our visitors.
      As for Sir Oscar. I’m pretty sure he’s not best pleased at the situation since it not only takes attention away from him but because they taunt him. Since when has one male ever stood a chance against 3 females? I don’t even stand a chance against one and I’m the one they say is head of the house.( ha ha ha, I choke laughing)
      Happy Monday all.

    • Mike, you should read Oscar’s Blog. He is VERY upset about the rodents. He is considering going on vacation to a faraway country! We can’t allow that just because the humans are going stark raving mad with RODENTS!!!!

  7. A ‘tiny wildebeest’ I love it. Big Bang is one of our favourites too!
    You do realize that getting the four boys will work out perfectly. They will have to get their own cage/apartment across the hall and will stare longingly across the landing at the women in the other cage/apartment too… Except for Sheldon of course.
    You really should know better than to go to a petshop just to ‘look’. Very few humans can resist a sweet face alone in a cage, to leave without a new friend takes almost superhuman efforts, so few if us can resist!

    • Don’t even think it. Remember Leonard manages to make it to the coital stakes with Penny on TV.
      As for the petshop, I promise I can resist a pretty face there and leave without a new friend. I just can’t prove it since it’s not allowed to happen.

  8. You know my dear friend, it does no good to put your foot down.. it just makes you look silly when you give us what we want anyway. You would get Lady J the moon if she asked and you know it 🙂 See I know since my daddy puts his foot down and we still have 3 dogs, a cat, a bird and a snake named Fluffy! I can’t wait to see the pics when you add the rat-wing onto the !!!!

    much love and hugs!!!

    • My niece suggested today that she brings ‘Dave’ her hairless rat for a visit next time she comes to put a twinkle in his eye. Any more suggestions like that and I’ll poke her in the eye. Ju’s face became very animated and I heard words like Garage and Cages before I rapidly changed the subject.
      I might speak to my niece again in 5 or 6 years.

      • Hairless rat huh? lol, why did I just get a picture in my mind of little baby rats with only patches of fur? Oh my.. so ugly only a mother… or Lord and Lady Prosser… hee hee … could love them! Oh goodness, I can picture them for sure! You are in trouble mister!

        Hugs! xxoo

      • No. I should be safe. I’ve lost the garage key and told my niece we’ve moved to Florida. Hugs right back.xx

  9. Even though I don’t like rats, I must admit they’re cute.

    • 6 Months ago I wouldn’t have believed the different personalities they have and wouldn’t have had them crawling in and out of my pockets. They’re so bright.

      • Something in this reply makes me suspect that more lovely and brilliant rats are on their way… of course you might need to add a Rat Wing to the house, but why not? I am sure Julia will decorate it elegantly! I wonder what color scheme she will choose, so don’t forget to post pictures, please.

      • You’d have been proud of me today. We visited Pets at Home and saw some beautiful boys looking very like Bernadette. Ju opened her eyes as wide as she could and let her bottom lip quiver. I asked if she was in a draught and walked away. When she caught up I said NO MORE RATS and she didn’t argue.Mind you, I won’t trust her out on her own in the car this week.

      • To quote someone or other from the original Star Wars movies – I have a bad feeling about this. This being of course the Prosser breeding program… 😉

      • Erm, it’s not the Prossers who are breeding exactly. The world is safe from us at least.And Oscar suffered the unkindest cut of all when he was young so the world is safe from his progeny too.

      • I must be psychic, anticipating such a situation. Well, here is why it can’t be. You might want to show it to Julia:
        1. Facts of life: When boy rats and girl rats get together, baby rats are born. MANY, many baby rats…
        2. Cruelty to animals: If you don’t let the boy rats and girl rats get together, and they are in separate cages, they suffer extreme frustration because the pheromones are in the air. They think about nothing but how to get to each other’s cages.
        3. Finance: If you think about spaying and neutering four girls and a bunch of boys, you will need a very large bank account. VERY VERY large.

      • I do believe I may have raised just these issues with my beloved once or twice. I do believe she has dreamt of supplying pet shops with the progeny after taking first pick of the litters.
        Perhaps I just need a very large pair of scissors for the boys rather than a large bank account but the thought brings tears to my eyes.
        Rest Assured, there will be no Boy Rats taking up residence or holidaying here.The bill for chocolate drops alone is enough to ensure that.

      • I think the only solution to these many issues is to go ahead with my idea of making money from having rats around. Designing fashions for rats!!!! Here is the ad: Attention Fancy Rat Onwers! Can you imagine how lovely your lady rats would look in a custom designed lace tutu? A demure little black dress and pearls? And for the gentlemen rats, tiny brocade vests, elegant white silk scarves? We at Rats ‘R’ Us provide reasonable rates, excellent service, and always quick shipping so your Fancy Rats will be ready for their next party or other engagement! Call xxx-xxx-xxxxx and a friendly customer service representative will be ready to help — we ship all over the world!

      • The worry with that is Ju might think she needs some male rats after all to do the modelling. Then they want fees for doing it and bring in the Unions and before you know it they own my home and live in splendour in relation to their size while I’m destitute and begging on the streets.You and Ju become filthy rich from Rats R Us designs and sell out to a multinational company for billions and they give Oscar a seat on the board.
        I’m already having nightmares.

    • WHAT? His Lordship destitute while the rats, Julia and me are filthy rich? Never!!!!!!! We would not dream about having the atelier for the rats’ designs without your participation. Your sense of fashion is needed!!!!! None of us would have the audacity to design a vest without your approval. The only problem is that indeed for vests, we need some male rats… But no unions!

  10. You know my dear pied piper… you haven’t forgotten that Yvonne loves her mother dearly 🙂 We women do tend to stick together in things… why if my mother wanted somethng badly enough, I might just have to get her a little gift now wouldn’t I? Just to cheer her up a bit when daddy’s being such a bear about things… who could blame me? Imagine the enormous smiles it would bring to her face. hmmm…food for thought…
    oh, how I do love pickin on you a bit now and then GL 😛 You’ll forgive me won’t you? Bazinga!

    huge hugs!!

  11. I think I’m safe there Patti since Yvonne and rats tails are a case of ‘Never the twain shall meet’. Maybe she can buy her a stuffed toy boy (rat) instead and I won’t squeal too hard. Bazinga right back at ya, funnily enough I’m wearing a tee shirt that says Bazinga now..

  12. I want one of those Tshirts! I asked mom to get one for me 🙂 I’ll be in Wales soon enough… perhaps I’ll just have to hand deliver a rat named Sheldon! Hee hee! I wish… don’t know how I could break away from the group. They’d have the whole place on alert lookin for me for sure! hmmm, what a scandal. Ambassador goes AWOL with rat…. found yelling Bazinga near Lord David’s abode. She’s thought to be a bit daft.

    Huge hugs,

  13. I’ sure no-one yelling Bazinga could be considered daft. It would merely emphasise your good taste in programmes. I hope your Mom manages to get you a tee-shirt, they’re becoming very popular. Even Julia has one. You’ll have to let us know when you’re due to be at Penrhyn Castle or it’s environs. I can’t remember if they have a tea room there but will find out.

    • I’ll shoot you an email… we need to exchange phone numbers as I will have a phone while there 🙂 I don’t see how they could refuse a Lord, do you?? They just have to let me see you guys. Otherwise, I guess we’ll accidently bump into each other!! lol 😛

      luv and hugs,

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