The End of Days

Today saw the end of the war. Julia fought many battles and has won many of them. In the end, superior forces sneaked in and defeated her. She left our presence but never our hearts at 4.10 am today, Saturday 30th March 2013.

Like me and our daughter, Julia was often overwhelmed by the support of so many people she didn’t know but often wanted to. She had great faith in people and declared herself a humanist whenever anyone asked. I always shared the best wishes of everyone who responded to a blog and sometimes we were able to share a laugh and a joke over them. One thing is sure and it’s that Julia was always grateful for the time people took to respond to something  written about her, even if I’d managed to be rude. She never considered herself important enough to be the subject of a blog, but I guess I owed her that much after the portrayal of her in my  books. I did wear the trousers in the house and had her permission to say so. In fact she certainly was important, not just to family and friends but to all those whose causes she undertook and by all those she raised money for, though I  never got as much as I deserved I thought.

When Julia passed away , the hospice ( the FANTASTIC St.Kentigern’s) had allowed Yvonne, Ugo and my nieces Karen and Joanne as well as myself,to remain by her side, sleeping in the lounge for hours at a time and supplying us with drinks. I want to thank the family for their strength and support and love as well as thanks to the staff from all of us for their patience and kindness. Their care of Julia was unbeatable. When we are able to hold a funeral In would ask for donations either to Cancer Research or to St. Kentigern’s to allow them to carry on doing such a brilliant job.

Tango and Ju














R.I.P Julia Prosser 15.07.1956 – 30.03.2013


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74 responses to “The End of Days

  1. David,
    My sympathies to you and your family.

  2. I’m so sad to hear your news, but glad the final battle wasn’t too prolonged and that you and the family have memories of Julia riding, just a little while ago. Bless you. Best wishes, Meredith

    • The final battle was just 11 days Meredith.I thought we’d beat it again but Ju put up a brave fight to the last.We have very Happy memories that Ju left us with and I shall draw heavily on them to keep me positive. Thank you for your kind words.

  3. My deepest sympathy, David. She was far too young. May your memories of the laughter you shared comfort you through the pain of her loss.

    • Thanks so much Shawn. You’re right, she was far too young and her loss will be felt by many. I wish I could have swapped which I’d have done gladly. But, as I’m still here I shall have to let the good and happy memories sustain me. Huge Hugs xxxx

  4. So sorry to read your very sad news, take care x

  5. I send you my heartfelt sympathy, and I thank you for that beautiful image of Julia and her horse. Just lovely.

  6. May Lady J rest in peace, and may you, David, know you are loved, even by many who have yet to meet you face to face. We’ve held you in our heart for a while and prayed for you and Julia daily. We won’t stop.

    • It’s easy to understand why your blog is so well loved. Thank you for the wonderful thoughts. I don’t think it’s me that’s loved by many as much as people have enjoyed reading about Ju and I’ve been the one lucky enough to write it. I feel blessed to know such wonderful people as those who stop and leave comments to brighten our days, real wordsmiths in most cases who Ju touched with her love of animals and people alike. I send you both Huge Hugs xxxx

  7. Oh, David! Words fall short of expressing our sorrow… May the good memories keep you through the days ahead. The Heaven has a new angel today, watching over your family.

    Please receive our prayers, love and hugs from Brazil!

    • Your words are wonderful Renata. All the good memories are a blessing and the writing has been cathartic over the months though I always hoped we’d win. I nhope the new Angel watches over us all, family and friends alike. xxxx Huge Hugs. xxxx

  8. Much love coming your way… and thanks for sharing the lovely picture xxx

  9. Sending so much love to you, your family, and those around you who have and continue to comfort you. May this difficult time and grief soon be replaced with all the wonderful memories you have shared together. ❤ (((hugs))) chocolate and flowers from your family across the pond… Janet, Don, and WiseGuy. xoxo

  10. There are no words David. A great lady has left this world but we will remember her. -hugs-

  11. Catherine Johnson

    So sorry David. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Julia will be forever in our hearts after the wonderful stories you’ve told us. *hugs*

  12. Food Stories

    David ~ Words cannot even come close to expressing the sadness that I feel, right now. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  13. I’m so very sorry for you and your family, but I take comfort in knowing that she isn’t in any pain now. You are in my thoughts. Good wishes and hugs to you, David.

  14. This is the blog post I dreaded seeing. David, Yvonne, and all your family, my heart is heavy today, and feeling this loss with you. Sending the most sincerest of condolences to all of you. The picture of Ju and her horse is a wonder addition to your blog post today. Thanks for sharing her with us. I want to say for you and Yvonne to take care of one another, but I know you’ve been doing that forever. Hugs, David.

    • Thanks so much Mary J. This was the post I most dreaded writing but having shared so much I couldn’t not share the last chapter. I’m sorry Ju won’t see her grandson but we’ll make sure he knows his Nanna. We’ll try to do as you suggest and look after each other which is now second nature to us. I appreciate all your kindness. Huge Hugs xxxxxxxx

  15. Heartfelt sorrow and joy are sent to you today. Imagine her rising with our Christ tomorrow and all the love she will be sending you, now that at last, she is pain and misery free, and can spend all her time loving and watching over you. I wish I could be there for you, but know Mary and I are sending all our deepest love and prayers that God gives you strength.
    Warmest hugs, Joseph & Mary

    • I’m afraid we didn’t share your beliefs Joseph. She firmly believed that after death she’d be going to meet her parents again.But, it’s a delight knowing the suffering is over for her now.
      Huge Hugs to you and Mary. xxxx

  16. It’s hard to loose a love one. I hope you take comfort knowing she is at peace. My thoughts and prayers go out to you.

  17. piroska

    “But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?
    It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.
    Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,
    Who is already sick and pale with grief
    That thou, her maid, art far more fair than she. . . .
    The brightness of her cheek would shame those stars
    As daylight doth a lamp; her eye in heaven
    Would through the airy region stream so bright
    That birds would sing and think it were not night.”
    William Shakespeare

    Dear David,
    Our prayers are with you and your family, may you find peace and comfort within them. ❤
    With deepest heartfelt sympathy – Piroska

    • Thanks so much Piroska. The Shakespeare verse is a beautiful reminder of how I felt about Ju even though I didn’t have his turn of phrase.Thanks for your prayers and kind thoughts. Huge Hugs xxxx

  18. I’m very sorry for the loss of your beloved Julia. I lost my husband to cancer, too, when he was also young. I came to your blog through another writing friend, and reading your blog posts about Julia, I can see how very much she will be missed.

    • Thank you Dee. I’m sorry if I’ve dredged up awful memories for you. You’re right, Julia will be missed very much. I’m grateful for your kindness. Huge Hugs xxxx

      • Oh no–you have not dredged up awful memories, but rather, your post allowed me to feel great empathy for your loss. Though we grieve our spouses, we will never forget the love we shared with those who have gone on before us. I am blessed to also take comfort in my faith. May you continue your journey, with many loving thoughts of your life with Julia
        always in your heart. ((Hugs)) back to you. You loved well.

      • I’m glad not to have caused you distress Dee, Julia would take me to task for that. However short my journey is to be I shall fill it with loving thoughts of Julia and our years together. I will also find room in my thoughts for all the exceptional people I’ve been privileged to meet and make friends with via the internet. Sending you Huge Hugs xxxx

  19. Thank you for sharing this story and the beautiful picture of Julia. I know the empty space she leaves is the hardest thing to deal with. She was so fortunate to have you by her side. You know I am thinking of you through all this. I am glad she is at peace but wish I could somehow console you in this ordeal.

    Best wishes and warmest thoughts.

    • But you do console me Virginia. All of you who’ve followed Ju’s story have always been so supportive and kind. She was always amazed people would be interested but I knew I was writing about someone special. I send you Hugs xxxx

  20. So sorry to hear your sad news. Take care of yourself.

  21. Perhaps, someday, when your heart has healed a little, you could give her memory a gift of writing about her brave battle. I know you feel like an arm of your tree has been cut off, but its’ roots are deep, and a new one has already started to grow in the form of your grandson. While her limb will always be empty, it will stand as mute testament that it once grew beautiful leaves of verdant green. Continuing the work she loved will keep her memory and passion for others alive, and grief, when used for others, is a powerful force for change. My thoughts are with you while you grieve and learn to cope.

    • How beautifully put Lorene. I hadn’t thought of us in terms of a tree but I know Ju would have approved and applauded. I will keep on with the fundraising she started and see it through to fruition and maybe raise funds for the hospice too.
      Sending Hugs xxxx

  22. Oh David, I am so sorry to hear that. I have been thinking about you all for days.
    What a lovely place Kentigern sounds, to let all of you stay for as long as you needed to be there for Julia, what a difference that would have made to you. HUGE hugs for you and your lovely family, and I hope that you still keep regaling us with tales of your Lady in the future.

    • Thanks so much Metan. My friends have given me so much support and suggestions about keeping Ju’s memory alive. St.Kentigern’s was brilliant and I can’t praise them enough, being allowed to stay made a huge difference as we could never have got everyone who needed to be there in time.
      Huge Hugs to you.xxxx

  23. David,
    I am so sorry to hear about the loss of Julia. I decided to post your “My Gutsy Story” tomorrow, in honor of your wife. She was a “Gutsy” lady.

  24. My deepest sympathies, David. I feel like I have been living in your (and Ju’s) pocket for a while. There have been many times you have moved me to tears. I hope that you can find kindness and solace in the days to come.

    • Thanks so much K.D. It’s hard sometimes to gauge whether the story has been told with too much information so as to bore someone or not enough to the same effect. I wanted people to be able to see and feel the things that happened but without them having to feel with us. It seems I didn’t quite manage it if I moved you to tears. I’m finding that the kindness of all my friends on here is giving me tremendous support to get through the early days of this. xxxx Hugs xxxx

  25. David, we must all face our arrival at the final destination in our own lives, and we all hope for the kind, cared-for loving experience you and your family gave Lady Julia. You encouraged her when needed, and more importantly, listened to her needs at the end, including providing.the adequate meds that eased her transition. Your narration made us laugh and cry; it is what made this blog impossible to bypass. And yes we lived it all through you. So take comfort in knowing so many invisible readers are grieving with you, and sending prayers of peace. — With Sympathy, Linda

    • What a beautiful piece to read Linda and I’m truly grateful for the comments and for you having taken the time to write. I’m amazed you think I’ve had such an effect on people but delighted to think I have moved them so much.. I’m also grateful to you and to others who have said that they see how much the family have cared for Ju, and that we eased her passing.
      I send you Huge Hugs xxxx

  26. David,

    It was with great sadness I read your news. We are only cyber friends but friends nonetheless. There is nothing I can say that will help you so I am just glad you have a loving family to help you get through the tough times ahead.

    I wish you all sunshine when it’s dark, laughter when you’re sad and moments of clarity when all seems lost. Take care of yourself and your amazing family. You are a strong man and I know deep down you will be fine, it may take a while to feel like that but it will come. Heavyhearted maybe, but you will get there.

    I may be hundreds of miles north from you but if I can help then please let me know x x

    • Thanks for such kindness. My cyber friends are greatly important to me and have given me such a source of comfort these last months. I’m so grateful for all the wonderful responses to my posts. Thank you. x

  27. Pingback: “I’m not ready to go yet, so don’t write me off.” | Sonia Marsh - Gutsy Living

  28. Collette

    My dear sweet friend,

    I am so very sorry to hear this terrible news, but I know that Julia will NEVER be forgotten. She has left a tremendous impact on many people, and for that reason alone she will remain immortal. My love goes to you and the family, to Yvonne, Ugo, the ratties and of course, you. I hope these coming days will not be too difficult, and you know where I am when you need me.

    Love and hugs from my family to yours!


    • Than you Collette for your sweetness. Julia has impacted on many lives and she was always thinking of others, I don’t know how she’ll react to knowing the rats have gone to a new home but I can visit them. I’m sure she’ll be able to see them too as I know they miss her. Thank you for your kind words and your offer. I am so lucky in my friends. Huge Hugs xxxx.

  29. You and your family are in my thoughts. It sounds like you have a lot of good memories to warm your heart in this difficult time.

    Tracey (ASMSG)

    • Thanks so much Tracey. Yes, I have wonderful memories of Ju to help me and I know Yvonne has the same. Plus, we have each other of course and for me that’s a huge comfort.Also for me the huge groundswell of support from my (our) cyber friends has been wonderful and has helped lift my spirits. Thanks so much for taking the time to help. Huge Hugs xxxx

  30. I’m SO sorry to hear this, David! My thoughts are with you. I wish I could send you strength. Gen.

  31. I hope your memories continue to make you smile. Hugs to you and your family.

  32. If good wishes, thoughts and prayers can help ease the pain then these you clearly have in abundance. Time too will add its salve. All strength to help you through this tough time. Best wishes to you and the family.

  33. David,

    I am late as always, but wanted to make sure I commented on this particular post. As I was catching up on my blog reading today I saw the title and hoped I was wrong.

    I realize we are only cyber friends, but I feel connected through your words to your family. Please know my heart is saddened with Julia’s passing and I am thinking of you.

    Aaron Brinker aka DadBlunders

  34. Your darling wife has left a legacy of love. She has lived her life well.
    Deepest sympathy for your sad loss. Hugs xx.

  35. In my experience there are no words that can truly comfort or ease the ache in the heart. The loss of our loved ones leave gaping holes in our lives, though I do believe that they live forever in our hearts. I would like to impart my deepest sympathies to you and your family.

    • Thank you so much that’s very kind. I agree that loved ones will stay in our hearts forever and we’re warmed by the cherished memories we can bring forth of them but oh what a gap they leave in our lives. I miss most sharing a joke with Ju or just turning to make a remark to her if we’re out.
      One day at a time eh.
      Huge Hugs

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