Daily Archives: December 21, 2013

My Account is Suspended in a Bank I Don’t Have?

Sunday. 4.18 am of the clock and all is NOT well. Grumpy,Tired and Awake  were always the worst combination of the seven dwarves. It’s the perfect opportunity to do some wrapping but thankfully I realise the noise will wake Mike. And believe me, I can curse loudly. So, I’ll answer messages from you lot instead and if I see one smug grin because you’ve finished your wrapping, I won’t be responsible for what happens ( Though technically I will be I suppose). Surprisingly for this hour of the morning I have messages from Santander telling me to pay something off my credit card, Lloyd’s Bank want me to do the same and Barclay’s lets me know there is a problem on my account so it’s suspended until the problem is sorted. It amazes me there’s anyone working at this hour except my antipodean friends and idiots like me. Fortunately I’m not so tired as to be insensible to the fact that I don’t have accounts with any of these banks. It really does worry me though as to how many of their customers think these spam messages are real and hand over the details needed to defraud them.                                                                                                                                                                                                        At 6.45 the yawns are coming thick and fast. I’m up to date with comments on the blog and there are no more messages for now. I  decide to try for another hour on the bed. Someone took me very literally and I awoke with a start at 7.45. Strange as I don’t remember taking a start to bed with me..boom boom. I do the usual wash and dress, feed the fish, take my sprays and tabs and finally make myself a coffee. There’s probably enough time to answer a few more messages before Mike gets up and maybe he’ll fancy a car boot sale. As it happens I could have written War and Peace before he got up at 9.30am. There’s no chance of a car boot sale at this time so we might as well stay in. Michael suggests we’ve time to wrap one more bag of presents each so quick thinking, light on my feet I remind him he needs a few special Christmas cards to take back with him. “No problem” says he, “I think we’ve time to wrap first and then go out or at worst I can buy the cards at home.” Panic !! “Oh no Mike, you’ve already had a card from Rose and one from your son so it would be nice to be ready with yours when you get back”. He gave that a little thought until half an hour later he thought I might be right. I made him a second coffee for that.                                                                                                                                                                                        By 11. am we were on our way to a little shopping precinct that has an excellent card shop but also has a large Supermarket with a cafe for lunch. Mike chose his cards and I told him what all the big words like ‘The’ and ‘And’ said and he headed for the till. I carried on looking round until he was ready. e headed for the Supermarket and decided from the menu what we fancied. As it happens we both chose to have roast beef dinners with a nice mince-pie to follow. Mike told me dinner was his treat today and would brook no argument. Not understanding what a stream has to do with anything I didn’t argue too much. We sat down with a drink and our allotted number and I took my ‘before’ tablet. We waited and then waited some more. I could see other later numbers being served and could feel the hair growing up my nostrils. Eventually it arrived and looked very nice. The meal was eaten in silence. I don’t know whether Mike was as disappointed as I was but I’m guessing so. I couldn’t say anything for fear of appearing ungrateful but it as a disaster on a plate. Too dry stuffing, roasts that weren’t really, what looked and tasted like boil in a bag meat, some individual portions f peas and carrots and some boiled potatoes. The boiled potatoes were the saving grace, they had texture and they were hot, the only things that were other than the plate itself. On the other hand, the mince-pie was excellent.                                                                                                                                                                                                                           I decided to have a walk round the shop while Mike nipped to the loo ( I remember a song from childhood with a line like ‘Skipped to the loo my Darling’ and now understand what it meant). I wanted to see if the CD by my friends Richard and Adam was in. For some reason the sale sign on a group of electric bulbs caught my eye though I have no idea why since I could supply have the UK from my stocks.  Moving on I found some perfect stocking fillers for someone and loaded up. On to the right aisle and I find that the Number 5 CD has sold out and prepare to go. Mike arrived saying he’d been looking for me and where the heck had I been? Glossing over that I said I was disappointed about the CD and he took great pleasure in pointing out a little pile that had been placed nearby. ” I told you it would make you go blind” he told me grinning from ear to ear.

Advert.. http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B00F4M8PME/ref=s9_simh_gw_p15_d0_i1?pf_rd_m=A3P5ROKL5A1OLE&pf_rd_s=center-2&pf_rd_r=1RWKRMPB4DPMQJG7VXP6&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=455344027&pf_rd_i=468294  Listen out for Oh Holy Night. They really are fantastic singers.

After paying we headed for home where Mike watched the end of some programme or other on TV. Next thing I know he’s shaking me to tell me it’s time for him to go. I waved him off and came back to deal with messages before going to have some tea and settle with a film on the goggle box. Ridiculous as it sounds I spent the rest of the evening feeling really lonely and sad. Just before midnight I checked Ebay and found I’d lost an electric violin for my beloved son-in-law which didn’t help. I settled for a short read and then slept.

Monday. OK, who is it that hates me? 4.05 and I’m back with the dwarves again. I wish Snow White kept better control of them. Still, it gave me chance to do another blog on a wonderful award I received and then notify my nominees. Before it was time to see to the fish I had plenty of chance to deal with my mail too. Fresh coffee by my side I start to do some more gift wrapping before my daughter arrives tomorrow with an offer to help………..wrap hers. Naturally that’s the one I get out of the way. Back on the mail again I find a great post about pop stars of the 80’s and pictures as they are now. Frankly some are glamorous but fighting the years and others are totally unrecognisable  as the stars they once were. Naturally this gives me the opportunity to put you-tube up with some tracks, Talk Talk, Simple Minds, Tears for Fears etc.  Suddenly I have the feeling of eyes following me round the room which isn’t difficult because pictures of Ju are on every wall. I’m feeling really sad, really low. That brings on the urge to play something different. Lets start with the Wonderful Josef Locke and Jerusalem-The Holy City, oh you’re not THAT old, OK, we’ll move it up a notch. The Manhattans with Kiss and say Goodbye? How about. Sarah Brightman and Andrea Bocelli with Time to Say Goodbye. Are you starting to see where this is going now? R.E.M, Everybody Hurts  http://youtu.be/5rOiW_xY-kc    .I put on Freddie Mercury’s last ( and my favourite) song  These are the Days of Our Lives and the tears are streaming down my face.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sDUmT3wm-0A&feature=share&list=FLykLqhnwlNz3Qz3GX3qyuXw&index=4  Please don’t let the postman knock. From there it’s a downhill spiral that even my sixties tracks can’t undo. The rest of Monday is hereby censored by Order of the Sanity Police.

Tuesday. I’d gone to bed late last night but today had a better start with a 6.00 am rising. There was a manageable amount of mail first thing ( 59) and I was grateful I didn’t have a drink to choke on when one I opened offered the most Amazing Sex . The bloody message alone nearly brought on an Angina attack ever mind the sex which I’m sure would have killed me. I haven’t got the foggiest idea what I wrote to anyone after that so if you got an odd message or comment you now know why. After I got washed and dressed, saw to the fish, took tabs and made a coffee these images were still running through my head. I needed a cold shower but hate walking around in wet clothes, though it’s possible the water would have turned to steam anyway. Why in the heck am I getting messages like his? There is only one way to clear my head and that’s music. Back to you-tube, a duo I think were very underestimated were The Marbles  http://youtu.be/ghHRknAUB0g  but this track is so funny as there’s hardly any pretence about the miming and yet the song and the voices are fantastic. Next up is Marmalade, ( no Seumas, it’s not breakfast time, put that knife down please, Matron’s on her way) http://youtu.be/vnbY089cQlw  Don’t you just love the accent of the presenter?  No show would be complete without my Mamas and Papas with California Dreamin’  http://youtu.be/N-aK6JnyFmk   . I’m sorry for all you visitors who are too young to know these tracks ( most of you) but it should at least be an education for you as to what your parents ( OK, Grandparents) used to listen to. Now back to my mail for a while and then get ready for Yvonne coming with little chubby cheeks………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………… They arrived at about 10.45 by which time amazingly I was up to date. We didn’t need to go out until about midday so there was plenty of time to watch Reuben’s face break into a grin as I made him into an aeroplane and flew him overhead or let him stare at the big canvas of his mum and day who h has no problem recognising. I let Yvonne look over the folder of sketches and poems I’d done for her as a child.  It was funny watching the recognition appear on her face and then change to a look of panic as she said ” Please tell me I didn’t understand some of these when we read them.” I eventually assured her she didn’t.

images

Dominic Dragon was at a loss, not sure if it could be,

that as the result of a one night stand, and a pint of blood or three.

How an increase in his girth appears, so he asks the witches coven,

It means that he now is a she and has a bun in the oven.

Just a brief ‘interlewd’ for entertainment purposes. At twelve we head out for the bus and I drop a prescription into the chemists for repeat. They’re very good and do it all for me. The bus driver isn’t the most cheerful chap I’ve seen as he neither lowers the electric step to get the pram aboard or help with it so I try and grab the front and lift it up to the step. Because I can’t use one crutch to do this Yvonne is trying to use one hand to stop me toppling over. Complete slapstick. We manage the trip to town and draw up by the bus stop. I stand to put my sticks on and almost fall as the bus jerks forward a couple of feet, Yvonne grabs me ans as I steady lets go. The bus jerks forward a couple more feet and there I go again. I just right myself when it goes for the third and last time. Someone is crossing the road ahead of him and he’s creeping up instead of waiting. The door opens and I make for it when the driver gets up and leans out shouting ” Take your time won’t you, It’s not like I have a timetable to keep to.” I hang back a mo ostensibly to give him time to move out of the way but really in case she throws something heavy.                                                                                                      We manage to get down to Kassidy’s for lunch where I have liver and onions with mash. I’m told the iron is good for me when I’m pregnant which I certainly look. Yvonne says if the iron is good for me why don’t I use it on my shirt. I’m not sure children should be allowed to be disrespectful of their elders. Lunch done we go to the doctors to have my BP checked. It’s normal !! 140 over 80 YAY. It’s all this sensible eating. We go to celebrate by looking for two things, a prawn ring and some vol au vent cases for Yvonne’s Boxing Day Buffet. We manage to fill two large carrier bags at Lidl but don’t blame me, it’s her bad influence. Since we didn’t find vol au vent cases we move on to Tesco’s.Another very large carrier bag full which isn’t my fault either, I mean can you see me looking for butternut squashes? I don’t even know what they are. Reuben is on the point of waking up and the weight of the bags on the pram handles has them almost level with the floor. One wrong move and he’ll be catapulted out. We head for home. With my freezer temporarily full of food I leave Yvonne and Reuben in the lounge for 40 mins while I clear a little mail. Nothing exciting. At 5.pm I go through and take Reuben to bounce on my knee. I swear it would be less painful to use a sledgehammer. We play until Ugo arrives from work and he’s brought some tea. In my case that means sausage and chips. I can’t be rude and not eat it so I force myself sad that my sensible eating rule only lasted a few hours. They head off to bath my little champion and it’s back to mil until 900 pm when the latest The Mentalist is on.Damn, I had the wrong Red John. But Patrick kills the right one in the end….doesn’t he? Mail catch up  again until it’s time to go for a read. Night y’all.

Wednesday. Early start at 4.21 which for some reason I thought said 7.21 and got up happily. ( Twit. Note to self, get new glasses). By 6.00 am I was bale to start wrapping a few more gifts , my obvious enthusiasm showing through as I managed to tape everything to everything else ad had to separate them with the scissors. Then I lost the gift tags  which after a good ten minutes search I found partly attached to one of the gifts and partly to the sleeve of my cardigan- but on my rear side ( If you lot think I’m going to feed your crude humour by saying backside, think again ). By 8.00 am I was bored and glad of the chance to go and turn the fish TANK on and take my tabs. After that I came back through with a coffee to get dressed.                                                                                                                                                                                                                         A little later I took a walk to the Chemist/Post Office ( You can tell it’s a village can’t you ) and took a card and some sweets for them. Then a card for the paper shop and a chance to buy fresh bread and ciggies. I was very disappointed to see they had none of my fresh barm cakes in so I ended up with rolls. I came home and tidied up before MuJo visit and get their drinks ready. They turned up a little later than usual at  just gone 11.00 and after drinks and  half hour natter we headed for lunch. Despite me having chips last night I was made to martyr myself by having them again. As a few of my favourites were not on the menu today I was also forced into eating sausage again too. We were served by a youngster I haven’t seen before who needed  little training as the meals came without mushy peas and bread and butter ( criminal offences both) and didn’t offer the pensioner discount. I’m sure he’ll learn. Muriel go the bill and wouldn’t hand it over. She says she’s very tired today after a busy weekend so forgoes and expeditions and heads for home. After another half hour in which she answered the door to a parcel delivery and then found herself wrapping the parcel, they left. I’m sure it was nothing to do with the size of the box she had to wrap really. I brought my mail up to date and decided to go through to watch the afternoon feelgood Christmas film. Fortunately for me I saw more Zzzzz’s than film as the little I saw was suffering from a sugar overdose.                                                                 I had my tea which after the chips at lunchtime was of necessity small but did manage the four dark chocolate finger biscuits afterwards. I got out two mugs and  a glass ready for the Wednesday ‘playschool’ just as Dil and Matthew arrived. One tea, one coffee made and we settled to a game of scrabble. Half way through Lee arrived and I got his glass of water. It’s a shame that his arrival didn’t distract anyone enough to let me amend the scores a bit.Anyway, Dil won as I has to subtract ten points from my score for the Q I picked up towards the end after they’d made sure there were no ‘U’s in the open. We started again with Lee taking part and this time I held my own. ( What have I told you lot at the back about making up your own jokes- stop it). A quick break while I brewed up  again and out came the cards. There was no pretence on Matthew’s side this week but Lee said he remembered playing as a kid ( he’s only 30) and might need some reminders. Not so, he’s just as bad as the rest of us and won the game. We did start playing another one but it was getting late and it had to be brought to a halt. ( Typical, just ‘cos I was winning). As they refused to come and play next Wednesday for some reason, Dil suggested they come on the Friday afternoon and make a real go of it so if no mail gets answered that day you know why in advance.  We exchanged gifts for under the tree, hugged and said goodbye. Time for a quick catch up and then a read in bed till half past midnight.

Thursday. 6.01 am this morning, and I double checked the clock first. Eased gently into the day with not too much post (39) only one of which wanted a partnership in exchange for half a 26 million dollar bank account left behind when the owner died tragically without family. I decided against it as what’s half to me? I mean, it wouldn’t even keep me in aftershave would it. Just before 8.00 am I told the picture of Ju with Bernie on her shoulder that I was off to feed the fish, take my meds and as usual on  a Thursday sort my meds out for the week. That took quite a while and it was 9.00 am before I was back ready to get dressed. It was time to go out to post a letter and get my lottery tickets. It seems I was just minutes behind a lady who won £20,000 on the lottery raffle last night. I imagine she’s going to have a great Christmas this year. Good for her !                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                I’ve dealt with the queries from the bank about Ju’s death, now I have queries to make about transferring a gift from Ancestry.com to Ancestry.co.uk of another year long membership. It’s a wonderful, unexpected present I just received notification of . Lunchtime looms and so I take my pre-lunch tab, set the microwave to go and sit down with the end of another Murder She Wrote. Sometimes I wonder how Jessica Fletcher has any friends, half get murdered and the other half she denounces as the murderers. As the micro bings that episode comes to an end and there’s just time to prepare my tray before another one starts. I haven’t seen this one before and sit eating my lunch to her finding that an accident wasn’t and that the killer is someone we don’t expect. But as it’s in Cabot Cove she knows them all. Actually on this one I know it was murder but it should have been more obvious as the motor cyclist ran into a cable and to my mind he’d have been jerked off his bike and found in the road rather than down a small ravine with his bike. People always say I have a detective mind, or is it defective I can’t remember?                                                                                            After lunch I come through to keep abreast of the mail. There are loads of messages telling me I can still order things with delivery guaranteed for Christmas but I’m smug in the knowledge that apart from food on Saturday and fresh bread on Tuesday I’ve finished shopping. Yeah, you never thought you’d see me write that did you. But remember the sales start on Boxing Day so maybe I’ll start shopping for next year then. Maybe I can hide new purchases in my now almost empty  loft and find them again in a few years time. I’ve finished the mail and stand up, stretch and head towards the afternoon film when there’s a knock at the door. I know who it is and I’m prepared with a box of chocolates for the nice lady who delivers my medicines. With thanks and wishes of a Happy Christmas on both sides I close the door and go through to turn the TV on. I know what’s going to happen straight away and withing a few minutes it does, Zzzzzzzzzzzzz. I’m away in my own little world until almost 5.00 pm when I’m automatically going to wake for The Mentalist. I make some tea and sit down to watch it but find I’ve seen it recently so I put a quiz on instead. I have the U.S. version of Law and Order before heading off to see to mail and starting the day’s blog. I’m expecting Mike to text to say he’s on his way, but not holding my breath as I’m still waiting for the one that says he got back safely on Sunday. At 10.00 pm I go through to see the latest Person of Interest which is a great little story this week about a Cuban taxi driver wanting to bring his family to the U.S. but getting involved with the Mafiya from one of the Eastern European Countries. Time for one last blast at mail, one last update and now for a read. I’m struggling with this book and may not finish it before Christmas when it gets abandoned in favour of the new Terry Pratchett.

Friday. 4.43 am and I’m awake. If I catch which one of you is at the back sniggering there’s a shoe- no, a boot- coming in that direction. I’ve been having the strangest dream. A small group of friends ( of whom I’m one) is on an adventure when it seems we’re betrayed and I get arrested. I remember being offered a drink and being aware there may be drugs in it. A woman, part of the group arrives and has smuggled drink in to wash out the drugs and to keep  me hydrated, only I know how/where she smuggled the drink and I’m delighted to say that all of a sudden it wasn’t me who was arrested anymore and had to drink it. That was one lucky Get out of Jail Free card I drew. For some strange reason it made me think of the great bravery of women now I’m awake. Edith Cavell comes to mind.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edith_Cavell  http://listverse.com/2013/09/05/10-women-spies-who-brought-down-the-third-reich/                                              http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Violette_Szabo                     It never pays to underestimate a woman as I’ve found to my cost many a time. Yvonne has taken over from Julia in getting me to say something, making me think it’s my own idea until later I realise it’s probably the exact opposite of what I wanted to say. Anyway, I’ve managed to  get the mail up to date including a message that saddened me no end from a fellow blogger whose daughter is missing in France. It would be wonderful to think maybe they could be reunited for Christmas.                                                I’ve taken a walk to the Post Office this morning to send a letter to my cousin in California. We’ve had an exchange of Christmas cards for a few years with letters always promised. She moved a few years ago and I’ve worried about her ever since as there’s never any proper news forthcoming. It could just be that she thinks I’m a nosy beggar of course. A card from her arrived in the post addressed to myself and Ju so I thought it was a good opportunity to catch her up from here. I also went out to the paper shop for milk and fully had the intention to but a ham salad bap for lunch ( honest I did). Coming out of the paper shop with the milk and I headed home totally oblivious to the mission I’d gone on so I had to force myself to eat a cottage pie. This was much nicer than the last. Michael sent his usual ‘On way’ message  and arrived to terrorise me in the early afternoon. I made the mistake of not hiding the TV remote which means I’ll be stuck with his choice of programmes till he goes home again.  After I’d  made drinks we nattered a bit before I nodded off. I’m not sure he noticed as he was still talking when I woke up.                                                                                                  I made a meal about 6.00pm and when he’d begged enough even shared it. I got to see my Law and Order that way. And he washed my hair again. When he goes to Canada for a month next Easter I’ll have to go along just to keep my hair clean. At 10.00 pm I called it a night and came through to plough my way through 76 messages and posts while Michael went to bed to watch TV. It’s just gone off so maybe he won’t be so hard to wake in the morning for shopping. I’m going to need help from the God of shoppers this week as I’ve heard of people fighting over fruit and veg during the last few days. I hereby promise I won’t be caught fighting over the sprouts.

Saturday. 4.07 am and I even saw the clock face clearly. It took me all my time ( sorry) not to throw a pillow at it. I wonder if a luminous clock isn’t a bad idea and I should wake up and either lie there till it’s light or nod off again if possible. But it’s still 4.0’bloody 7 and I’m still awake so I might as well get up. There was plenty of mail to keep me occupied. One or two posts have been very sad with people obviously having problems either despite or maybe because of the time of the year. I do sympathise honestly. They say that misery loves company but that’s not actually true. Misery doesn’t like the company of misery so I left Mike in bed. He’s not what you’d call a morning person. Even lunch time is a bit touch and go…. His alarm went off at 7.00am but he just turned over. I went through to the kitchen and made a coffee for him. Placing it gently on his bedside table I spoke softly, ” Coffee’s up Bro.” I know the second word he spoke was “OFF”. but I didn’t quite catch the first one. I retreated to the bathroom for a was and then got dressed. As I came out of my room Mike had emerged from his, the usual caveman persona in place, just throwing out the odd grunt. I decided to do the bins. Food waste first I emptied the bin, put a new bag in and took the waste to the bin outside placing it where the dustbin men could get at it but out of the way of the Siberian wind trying to whistle it’s way round my Khyber Pass. Large wheelie waste bin next and that could withstand a bi of a blow so when I brought out the recycling bags I placed them under the bin for safety. I turned to re-enter the house then turned 180 degrees to catch my wheelie bin rolling away. Damn wind, I shouldn’t have had those beans yesterday. Still I digress, I caught the bin and turned it sideways on so the wind couldn’t roll it away. I got fully inside this time and washed my hands. Now approaching 8.00am Mike looked  sounded a little more human and was ready to take me out.                                                                             It was obvious the Supermarket was much more crowded than usual when we got there as we almost had to park on a mini in the car park. But inside there seemed to be plenty of stuff. The stupid thing was the dates. Many of the things on my list were for Christmas day or later yet so many hing had a best by date of 22nd. Still, eventually I got most things and the rest I’ll try for on Tuesday if Mike is here. This year I didn’t have the heart to buy individual gifts for Temptations but Mike and I headed there for a coffee and took a large tin of sweets and a smaller box of Champagne truffles for everyone. Mike traded insults with Ceri as usual and as usual she laughed all the time. She’s a breath of fresh air sometimes. Then home to unpack, if any of you remember the story of my fridge you’ll know how I miss the old one since this one is choc a block full with not an inch of space to spare. Using a shoe horn everything was finally packed away. Time for a quick coffee and a look at my mail before we head off again. There was an early batch of one liner messages from someone to brighten my day. No further response from Ancestry.co.uk so closing down I wash the coffee cups and get my coat on. We lunch at the Dragon’s Rest( no Mother in Law jokes here you notice) and though there was a tempting roast beef dinner on the menu ( the waitress brought a cloth and wiped it off) I settled on bacon, egg, chips……and beans. Mike had a breakfast but kept his eye on his black pudding so I didn’t stand a chance. We drove to Colwyn Bay where he dropped me to meet my ex brother-in-law while he carried on to Rhos on Sea to meet out friend who’d been ill that morning and couldn’t come out. I met John T by the precinct and took him for coffee at Costa where I was able to hand over his Christmas gift and one for his birthday on Boxing Day. I always feel sorry for those who get only one gift if their birthday falls close to Christmas. John was surprised I’d brought him any but Ju loved him very much and I knew she wouldn’t want him forgotten. He asked if I’d like a walk round the hops as though I can’t do without them. Naturally I thought about it for approximately a millisecond and said yes please. At this point I offer a word of advice, take a seat ! Apart from two refill packs of tissues for mike I bought nothing ! Aw come on, I’ll get a signed affidavit if you want. Nothing at all !! After a couple of hours Mike picked me up and we headed back home where I made some tea, watched him steal my mince pies then fill his face will chocolates and look longingly at mine. We watched A Christmas Carol with Patrick Stewart in the lead and though Alistair Sim is still the best in my opinion it still did raise a lump in my throat. Shh, don’t tell Mike though.                                                                                                                                                                                               I came through to see to the rest of my post. Still some really sad ones,  and then to prepare to make you suffer as usual. Blog Time !

I wish you all a Wonderful Christmas and a Fantastic New Year. Hugs Galore as usual.

lunch time1pumpkin 1

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