Daily Archives: May 9, 2015

Alternate Title & I want to be a Great, Great Uncle.

It’s taken me until late this evening to realise that last week’s blog went out under the title of Sunday. It’s not the first time it’s happened that I’ve forgotten to change the title in line with whatever occurs during the week. But I’ve been looking at posts all day which said ‘so and so’ likes your blog Sunday. You’d think I would have got the hint from that wouldn’t you.

I got to bed about midnight last night and read part of a Pratchett novel. I’m determined to re-read them all again though I’ve lost count of the number of times already. I woke around 3.00 am and paid a trip to the loo but decided I wasn’t ready to give up sleep just yet so snuggled down again until 5.09 am which suited me much better. There may have been a clap of thunder at the earlier mark but I’d like to believe it was Somnos stamping his foot. There was absolutely no way Mike would ever get up at this time so I could dance naked amongst the daffodils and he wouldn’t know the difference but I’m afraid of someone walking past and wishing I’d iron my coat so I’ll stick with going on the blog. I engaged my brain in a few ebay searches first to see if there was anything exciting coming up this morning but nothing inspired me. Time to turn to the emails.Well, there were a lot and that was just last night’s. I think Santa had dropped his sack on me because he couldn’t be bothered trailing round more houses. Still, I was undaunted as I guess I’m officially back from holiday today. lol. From last night’s messages I had two telling me I needed to download an ASDA voucher I’d won and yet when you see the address they’ve come from, you can see they’re not from ASDA and if you open them they’re blank apart from an attachment. NOT TO BE OPENED FOLKS. Someone told me they leave the errors , spelling, bad addresses etc in on purpose so that educated people will see them and ignore them. Anyone who doesn’t notice the errors is much more likely to fall for their scams. Not very nice.

I went through to the kitchen at 7.05 am to take my meds and make a coffee. There was a light drizzle outside but the birds were still giving it some welly. Their singing was awesome. Unlike some people they were happy to get up in a morning. Last night before going to bed I’d gone to the loo and found someone fast asleep so I’d turned his TV off and crept quietly away. Let’s face it the Brighouse and Rastrick Brass Band playing the Floral Dance could have marched through with me without disturbing him. I sometimes call him Lazarus as it’s like raising the dead. Once I’d got my coffee I returned to the computer and began dealing with today’s mail. There was a lot of that too but I expect that on a Sunday as some people comment on the blog. As always there was a lot of kindness there in the main saying don’t give up on the blog , hey, don’t blame me, they said it, and some also suggested I should get back to writing. It’s not that I don’t want to it’s that I don’t seem able to which is why I was hoping to perhaps find a collaborator somewhere local. If they can’t write with me maybe they could just wear winklepickers (I think you need to be born before 1970 to understand that) to prompt me. I do enjoy the Sunday morning conversations and I usually have opportunity to visit lots of blogs.

9.00 am came and went without any movement. He hadn’t been feeling too well for past of yesterday so a lie-in was excusable, it was starting to look like Mike was going to abuse the term. By 10.00 am I’d actually caught up on mail from both email addresses, bought a new suit and attended a wedding, he snored happily on. At 11.00 am I took a coffee through and woke him. When I mentioned the time it was a case of “Oh heck I’ll move” so I left him to it. He did move, straight into a different position. At 11.20 am it was “Don’t forget your coffee Mike, it’s going cold”. I actually saw him roll out of bed then. At least he beat midday. I’d turned the TV on while I was waiting so when he got up we were both caught up in that. At noon we were still watching as a really good serial came on. Mike made himself another coffee and we just watched it. When it ended at 1.00 am he hadn’t moved to get dressed. It was getting on for bedtime again. Eventually we were about ready to go out for lunch, then it was the where? I told him to surprise me. We ended up at the Dragon’s Rest where he’d fancied yesterday. He had a lamb dinner while I had a lighter ham, egg and chips then after a little discussion we had pudding as well. He had bread and butter pudding while I had rhubarb crumble and custard.

From the Dragon’s Rest we turned right through the village of Caerwys that we’d come through in the other direction yesterday, down onto the Mold/Denbigh Road at the bottom and a very short distance to Afonwen Antique Centre ( www.afonwen.co.uk ) where we stayed until 4.00 pm before heading home again along a new road we took by accident. It was a lovely run and brought us a different way into Holywell. Mike put the TV on and I joined him as soon as I’d got rid of my coat and sticks. It was a film. I watched a bit with him then nodded off. The next thing I knew he was waking me up to say goodbye. It was almost 6.00 pm. As soon as I’d waved him off  I headed for the computer to assess the damage. There was a lot. It took me until almost 11.00 pm to clear up and before I could start this As soon as I finish  which will be just a couple of minutes shy of midnight, I’ll be going to bed.

Monday.

4.33 am today. I was OK but knew I’d feel it later ( my excuse for a power nap). As soon as I returned from the loo I logged on and headed straight for the messages. during the course of trying to clear last night’s stuff I’d come across a couple of annoying ones I wanted to mention, a quick glance through this morning’s stuff shows they’re here again. The first purports to be from my ISP Talktalk.net telling me they’re going to implement some changes and want to be sure my current information is carried over correctly. Please complete and return the attached form. Please don’t open the form it carries a virus. Why some malicious armpit would want to infect the computers of so many people I have no idea.I suppose the answer is as usual ‘ Because I can’. The other most annoying one usually starts ‘ You have an hour before someone claims your voucher’ or just maybe ‘Congratulations you’ve won a voucher’. This one does not seem to be infected but still asks you to open an attachment. You might be directed to a site where you might enter to win a voucher but this is another advert for a gaming site. Since it tells you you’ve won and changes to you may win it’s clearly false advertising and should be shut down. But do yourself a favour and just send the whole thing to your waste bin.

I worked on that portion of my emails that weren’t cons and was making some headway when I decided to have breakfast. Of course my OCD brain decided on cold toast again ( I’m thinking of eviction), so at 7.0 am I put some bread in the toaster, took my sprays and my tablets then went to sit in the lounge with a cigarette. When the time was up I cut and buttered my toast and made a coffee. I sat in the lounge and ate it listening to the constant chatter of the birds and no, I’m not as mean as they say but there’s no shortage of berries for them whereas if I share my bread I have to go out. Once I’d done I sat there for a while just putting my life into perspective which in reality means daydreaming and avoiding the emails. I returned to work about 8.00 am not knowing what significance that time held today. By 9.45 am I’d finished the first batch of emails but rather than refresh I went over to ebay where a jacket was about to come to an end. I hoped to get it for Mike if I was lucky. I was lucky, by pouncing in the last 10 seconds it didn’t give anyone chance to outbid me and I got it for less than £15 including postage. I was watching a few things today so ebay would have to stay open.

I opened my second email address to find some more personal correspondence which gave me a laugh and lifted my mood. 8 One line messages from the same person in response to one line from me in response to one line from her and so it goes on. I think she has me on the ropes far more often than I do her but occasionally I have a winner and I love the reactions. I had to return to my normal emails and refresh the page eventually, As expected quite a few but I don’t mind because my relationship with the senders is good. Coming up for lunchtime I broke away but before making anything I decided to text my nephew for any news. It appears his wife went into labour at 8.00 pm last night and gave birth this morning at 8.00 am. A little boy at 7lb 8oz as yet unnamed. My fingers are crossed that there will be a Welsh name in there somewhere. I couldn’t be more pleased for them. They’ll be awesome parents.                                                                                                                                                                                               I had a cottage pie for lunch but couldn’t quite finish it because of an awful taste in one corner of it. Straight in the bin it went and I finished off with a yoghurt. It was time for a power nap but what became a full charge I think. I was there for an hour and a half. Lucky for me when I returned to the computer I was in time for the next auction. I employed exactly the same tactic on something that was currently at £3.50 with postage of £4.90. I knew my top bid would be £11.10 to make the package £15.00. I decided someone else may want the same thing as me, quite a few someones probably and thought they may go up to £10.00 but in the last ten seconds as I bid £11.10 it became clear someone else employed the same tactic with the same price. They lost because I got there first but it was a close call.

I worked only until 4.30 pm as the bank holiday meant some programmes were on at different times. I had a short gap back at work between 6.00 pm and 7.30 pm then I went to watch some more TV with the last programme being the first of the most recent Sherlock Holmes stories. That took me up to 10.00 pm when I needed to come back and catch up again. It was a close call. It’s almost midnight but I have time to add the music for today. I hope you enjoy it.

Tuesday.

I’m none too sure what time I first came round this morning but it was to the sound of whispered conversation. The thought that sprang to mind was ‘Burglars, where’s my stick’ but I heard “Ah look, he’s with us now” and opened my eyes. Arrayed on the footboard of my bed, which is clever since it’s a divan and doesn’t have one, were Somnos and his two brothers. I wanted to suggest they looked like the three wise monkeys but remembered I was quite happy with my head currently fitting all my hats and not relishing the thought that even a bottle cap could prove too large if I parted my jaws in anything but a smile. I’ve found Somnos to be a little short on humour unless he’s the one telling the joke.There was a lot of godly finger wagging in my direction and recriminations about me not keeping to my side of the bargain as his promotions man. Mind you Porcinus and My Brother Jake came in for a little telling off too as they’re supposed to be in post to remind me. It seems Porcinus has taken to the pastoral life with his pigs and goats and spends a lot of time in meditation whereas Jake is out partying till all hours with the younger small gods. No doubt that’s where he is when I’m wishing for a lottery win, collapsed under a table in a nightclub somewhere. His voice suddenly started booming and he faded away saying “Remember I’m counting on you…..” All of a sudden there was no-one on my bed but me and I was waking up again. It was 3.55 am. I had quite a tight feeling round my forehead, like a headache.

After my visit to the loo I signed on and logged into my mail. There was a fair bit of it but I thought I’d cope. Between then and 5.30 am when I went to get breakfast I caught 3 annoying emails Two don’t forget to download your voucher’s and one Hello My Dear Beloved In Christ. It was bin, bin, bin straight away. Breakfast was lovely even though I had to scrub the butter out of my moustache afterwards. I came back to the bedroom and got dressed. I’d washed my brown jeans yesterday and even ironed them last night ready for today so I could wear my comfortable brown shoes, the only problem with which is they’re lace ups. I put them on and spent about 20 minutes trying to reach them to fasten them. When 7.30 came round I was not only up to date on the post I was ready to go. I was approaching the bus stop when what looked like my bus sailed past. I was ready to text Yvonne and say I’d be late as I’d have to go by another route when the proper bus arrived. That was a trainee driver going out before him. As always I closed my eyes and concentrated on the various bus stops between me and Chester until I was ready to open them and get off……almost at the wrong stop. I think the potholes in the road had fooled me as to where I was. either that or I’d actually nodded off and had no idea where I was. At the correct stop I finally got off. Yvonne and Reuben were waiting and such delight in Reuben’s eyes as he saw me and pointed.

Hello hugs and kisses out of the way we wandered down the street.Yvonne asked if we could start the other end of town today and I agreed. First though a coffee. We visited the Costa we used to go to when I got off the bus in the bus station figuring they would have forgotten us and Reuben’s saucer smashing antics of a year ago. It seemed OK and they had breakfast there without Reuben trying to repeat the trick. From there we walked up to the Market and the gallery where we’d been visited by the butterfly last year, I think this could be our first visit since then. So many of the shops have changed it’s almost unrecognisable. We went round the big B & M store that Yvonne had even forgotten was there. Though she did suggest it we didn’t go to visit the pet shop with the budgies. Instead we walked back into town to see if the new TKMAXX was open yet only to find it’s mid-June before it’s due. No matter we got to look at the children’s clothes in H & M, remarkably I bought nothing and Yvonne says she’s getting worried. I’d told her all about my nephew’s new baby and she was delighted, her brother who never was, she’s very fond of Lee. All the wandering had taken some time and I needed to go for my bus. We were a little way away when Yvonne noticed it was already in so we had to speed up. I caught it and my seat was vacant so I was able to sit and wave through the window until we pulled away.

As always I closed my eyes. We pulled in at the main bus station and people got on and got off. I was startled when someone ran over my toe and then neatly parked on it. I had to open my eyes to find it was a woman with a young child in a buggy. I extricated my foot and shut my eyes again looking forward to a peaceful journey.                              “Mummy , want f’weeties, Mummy, want f’weeties” I heard. It was a whiny voice getting louder as it headed toward tearful. The mother explained she didn’t have any but they could get some when they got off. Explanation or not the voice went on and on repeating it “Mummy. want f’weeties” for an hour and a half of my one hour journey. When they got off in Holywell, 3 stops before me, running over my foot again in the process, I could still hear the voice. I couldn’t help but hope that whatever f’weetie the mother bought was a large one. When I got off the bus I went straight to Pauline’s to pick up some cigarettes, bread and my TV magazine. I also found she had some curry and chips in the freezer so I bought one for my lunch. At 1.15 pm I was home, took a pre-food tablet and bunged the meal in the microwave. As soon as I’d eaten I went to see how the post was doing. D’you ever know you’ve made a mistake? Looking at the mail was mine. My nephew had sent me some pictures of his new son though.

Prosser Jnr. No name chosen yet.

Prosser Jnr. No name chosen yet.

I worked on and on until 6.00 pm then left for a break. But only until 7.00 pm because I notice a film due on at 9.00 pm I intended to see. The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. I don’t usually watch late films in fact I rarely watch films at all. But. his was recommended. So, I worked up to 8.00 pm and saw a programme on bog bodies which actually came to some good conclusions and then sat and watched my film. I won’t say I wasn’t conscious of work as I watched it but have to admit it was worth the hassle. An excellent film. Back here afterward I had to do the blog which has meant not being free until 12.35 am and have had to leave the post until the morning. I have some photos I’m going to share over two days.

At the whipping post.

At the whipping post.

Going to the zoo joy.

Going to the zoo joy.

Wednesday.

It was almost 1.00 am before I got to bed last night so I restricted myself to a half hour read. Somnos must have been happy at yesterday’s mention ( here’s hoping he never reads things too closely and that his brother’s can’t read at all), because he didn’t wake me until 4.53 am. Though it’s only a little over 3 hours it’s better than some of his timings, especially when he’s not happy. I had a visit free-dream free sleep. I had a nightmare awakening though. I swung my legs over the side of the bed and suddenly my bladder went into action. It was screaming for attention and for a moment I thought I might have to grab a slipper to use. I did however get to my feet and get the slippers on and with a curious hop skip movement managed to get to the bathroom. Then I had to stand there for twenty minutes waiting for something to come. Talk about awkward.

Coming back from the smallest room I powered up the computer and logged on. First glance was at the Eurolottery where I could see that ‘Jake’ hadn’t been listening yet again. Next was ebay but I have nothing today though I may do a couple of fun searches later. When it could no longer be avoided I signed into my mail. I wanted to sign right out again but my hand wouldn’t move. I’m charging it with insubordination later. I could see there were 4 items with a virus removed. I just hate it that there are such talented people out there who’d rather perform a nasty deed than put their talents to good use. Anyhoo,I’d got up so late that I couldn’t break off for breakfast too soon so I waited until 7.00 am. After I’d taken the foodie and dealt with all other meds I lit a cigarette and sat in front of the TV with Will and Grace until it was time to eat.Once I’d eaten I returned to work straight away. It took me until 9.20 am to catch up on the mail and I thought I’d better get dressed. At 10.00 am I thought I’d better check in with Somnos to see if he was OK so I sat in my chair and nodded off. It took an hour to find out the answer,

Up to lunchtime I was back with the mail again, still on my main address. I was able to stop at 11.45 am. I made goulash for lunch and ate during a Time Team programme then stayed put for another history show that was very good. That kept me away from the computer until 2.00 pm. That gap came at a price however as I saw when I refreshed my page and opened my second mail account. That strangled sound you heard was me with my nuts in a nutcracker. I was hard at it until gone 4.00 pm and I hadn’t even revisited ebay yet. I decided to do so then. I did all the searches that I used to enjoy but nothing caught my eye today, I stayed away from coins as that could turn out to be quite expensive. Mind you , so can everything else if you get carried away. John came through on skype to say he and Mu would be here tomorrow. At 4.35 pm I  gave up and went through to the kitchen so that if Dil turned up at 4.40 pm as he had last week I wouldn’t be caught on the hop. As it happened I needn’t have rushed as he and Matt walked in at 5.05 pm. I wished Matt a Penblwydd Hapus for yesterday, pointed out his card  with money in and his cigarettes then went to do the drinks before Dil complained at the delay. We sat and watched the quiz till 6.00 pm with Matt reading the questions out to Dil who has to squint at my measly 32″ screen.

At 6.00 pm we set up the table and started. First came my humiliation at Yahtzee when Matt and I won just one each and Dil won four. We followed that up with Chase the Lady. It was a very hard fought battle but in the end Matt and I ensured Dil lost while I pipped him to the value of five points, just one card. Finally we set up for Nomination Whist and I started well but by the end it was anyone’s game. My name just happened to be anyone so I won, ahead of Dil by just one point. I herded them out before they started breaking things. I tidied up and washed the pots then took my meds before coming back through here to gloat while I did the mail and the blog. I seem to have done something to my mail accounts so that they’re no duplicating everything so it’s taking longer to do.

zoobaby 10

 

zoobaby 12

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

parkboy2

parkboy4

 

R.I.P Errol Brown. Lead singer of Hot Chocolate. 1943 to 6th May 2015.  A nice man.

Thursday.

It was a 3.58 am start this morning and I’m pretty sure it was a 3.57 am end to last night. It felt like it anyway though I was most definitely awake. An email yesterday had warned that the next time I signed into the bank I’d be asked to create a password to go along with the generated number code I already have. I hate all this messing about but thought I’d better bite the bullet and take a look. As soon as I came back from playing will I, won’t I at the loo I logged on. Creating a new password wasn’t too difficult it’s the remembering them that causes all the problems. Anyway I came out of there and started on the mail. Whether it’s my imagination or not but the con trick emails are getting more frequent. It feels like every other one. Some are groan inducing like that Christ The Story Reading Ape who tricks me into believing he has a joke to tell.

I had breakfast at 5.45 am because I knew MuJo would be here during the day and wasn’t sure at that point when Dil would be picking me up to meet his new grandson. I hoped they’d decide on a name soon or I’d not be able to think of him as anything but PJ. I ate breakfast watching some of the Homes under the Hammer series. I enjoy seeing how people can turn a property round whether it’s to live in, rent out or sell. They all made excellent jobs  of what they did today, especially the two who were going to use the places for themselves. One person bought a piece of land for £50,000 and then sold it for £75,000 a few weeks later without doing anything except get some plans drawn up. At 7.00 am I went back through and carried on working. At 9.00 am I stopped, got dressed and went out to get my lottery tickets ready for tomorrow . As I came back the post van was getting close. I was back inside with my coat off when the knock came. The postman (Darren) passed over one and said “Jacket”, a second with “Trousers” and a third with ” and two handkerchiefs”. Funnily enough he was right on the first one, it was a jacket. The second was a robe for the Templars and the third was 2 packets of sweets from my wonderful niece Karen as she’d found dark chocolate Rolo’s. I think I need to hide them.

I spent so much time unpacking them and leaving feedback that time was getting on and MuJo arrived. I went through to see to drinks. We were talking about what we’d been up to and they were asking about the ‘little man’, I always have to ask if they mean Reuben or Mike. But when they couple it with mention of Tuesday I know it can only be Reuben. We left at 11.15 am as Muriel needed the Post Office which I knew meant we were going to the chippy again. Heaven help my arteries. We arrived in town at 11.3 am and John headed straight for the food rather than do the Post Office and visit his charity shops. I had liver and onions today as Thursday is the only day they seem to have that on the menu. That’s cos they wash them on a Friday no doubt. After eating we had a wander round the shops John likes and I could feel a slight discomfort at the waistline. Once we’d exhausted the Holywell shops we took to the open road for Flint. A minor hiccup while we found a good place to park and we were our usual carefree selves. I was allowed one shop to get chocolates before we went for a coffee. Temptations was heaving but that was probably because it was only 1.30 pm and the local workforce were on a break. We did manage to find seats though and I almost enjoyed a drink but the pressures against my belt were growing. I finished the drink as quickly as I could and said I’d be outside having a cigarette in the sunshine. It was quite difficult leaving the place with the phut, phut of a little lawnmower following me so closely. I managed to get outside to the open air without either catching anyone’s attention or killing them.

We had a few more shops to go before Muriel did the ice lolly run and I could eat mine before getting in the car. By now the belt was cutting me in half but I didn’t want trousers round the ankles so I bore it with dignity and a very red face. We were pulling out of the car park ready to hit the main road when I saw a feral cat sitting on the verge looking disinterested inn the world in such a way you knew the world was getting it’s full attention. As we came to a halt beside it I saw it flex the claws on one paw and look over. I told everyone not to look at it because I knew if we did hat claw would be held against the side of the car as we drove off. There would be a set of marks running front to back and the cat would just congratulate itself on a manicure. Getting out of the car at home presented it’s own problems and instead of handing my key to John as usual so he could visit the loo I set off at the gallop. I opened the door, threw everything into the bedroom, ( the 16 piece teaset is now a 64 piece) , and dove into the bathroom. It was some time before I was able to come out. When I vacated I had been considerate with the spray and the news was calling it a low lying fog bank.

At 4.30 pm MuJo started heading for the car. I carried the bag of little gifts I’d gathered during the week for them and waved them off. As soon as they were out of sight it was back to the loo. And after I’d started work, a third visit. I had to hope there wasn’t a major problem or I’d be unable to meet my great nephew tonight. I worked until 6.15 pm as Dil was picking me up at 6.30 pm. He was nicely on time and I’d had no further problems by then. When I got out to the car his wife was in the back, leaving me the front seat. I asked about her broken wrist and was told it was on the mend. Lee lives in a delightful little village called Penymynydd but the route is really convoluted to the house. It was lovely to get there and meet the newest member of the family. He’s lovely. Poor Jen looked a little tired and poor Wilson the golden labrador didn’t enjoy not getting his usual fuss. We stayed well over two hours and all got to hold PJ, I even enjoyed it without being scared of dropping him. Eventually though we had to leave and Dil and Lynn dropped me off at home where my bro- wife Mike was waiting for me with “And where the hell have you been eyes”. The answer was “What the hall are you doing here, you weren’t due until very late.” We went through the process of describing our week to each other before I had to drag myself away to work on this. It’s almost midnight and I need my bed regardless of how much work will be there in the morning.

Friday.

Well, I only dared read until 1.00 am but I managed to finish my book and start another one. One of the drawbacks of reading a Terry Pratchett book is him not having chapters. That natural break where you stop reading. Of course the fact he’s so damned hard to put down doesn’t help. I don’t suppose it was long before I dropped off once that light was out as I was nicely relaxed. I got up at 4.46 am I could see it was getting lighter outside and the birds seemed OK at being woken so the world was fairly tranquil. I headed for the loo for the Charge of the Water Brigade and you can keep jokes about lengths of hoses to yourself thank you. I came back and worked till 6.00 am on the mail then headed for the kitchen to start my breakfast going while I took my meds and then filled the post with the next week’s supply.  It was past 7.00 am before I’d finished and was able to come back to work. Well, I say work but what I really mean is ebay. I wanted to see what was due today and it turns out it’s a jacket I want for my nephew but I couldn’t bid too early as it wasn’t due until nearer 5 pm. Nothing else was important before then.

I started concentrating on work and trying to get into a good position with it. By 8.30 am I was pretty well caught up and in need of a numb bum break. I went through to the lounge and plonked myself down in the chair. I contemplated putting the TV on to see the news with the election results but was afraid either my cheers or my tears would wake Mike. I just sat contemplating my navel for a while which naturally started to drift towards 40 winks. My eyes must only just have shut when this almighty racket broke out. Mike had put his alarm on for 9.00 am on full volume. The town didn’t stand a chance and started running for old air raid shelters and outside loos. I ran to turn the kettle on and make him a drink. However loud the volume though it didn’t get him up though he did turn it off at least. As soon as the kettle boiled I took the coffee through. Now bear in mind that I have the shakes and carrying a coffee is difficult, for some wazzock to suddenly say “Thank you” when you think he’s asleep is quite a shock. He nearly wore the coffee. I went back to work to calm down.

I heard Mike get up and go through to the lounge. I finished off the last couple of messages before joining him. Once there I was able to turn the TV on to get the election results. I even got them in stereo. Whatever we saw on screen Mike repeated like I hadn’t seen it and then when told one party was on 112 seats said one more and it’ll be 113. As soon as it happened I got “I  told you so”. I’d have killed for a gag. We’re on opposite sides of the political divide. Somehow the Conservative Party won a majority so that despite all the pundits saying there would have to be a coalition whoever got in, they were wrong. Mike voiced his opinions that the fools had got in while I voiced mine that I was glad they’d be able to form their own Government without having to barter favours with another political group. This time thy can be judged on their policies and promises kept. It was a major annoyance of mine that at the last election we’d been promised a referendum on Europe in the campaigns, but which was lost as the price of co-operation from the Liberal Democrats as the coalition partner. This time round, that had better be honoured or I’ll campaign myself for the anti-liars party. So Mike was disappointed Labour didn’t win but which pleased me as they’ve always been a financial liability to the country and kept taxation up. John will no doubt be unhappy that his UKIP party did so badly and I’m pleased with the results but waiting to see just how much they care about the people they represent this time.

All this electioneering meant Mike didn’t leave the house until about 11.10 am which makes it slightly difficult to get to his Dad’s for 11.0 am. I was really pleased to see he was wearing the new leather jacket I got and seems to like it. It does suit him. I got dressed and went to Pauline’s for some milk and I bought some microchips to have with some corned beef at lunchtime. And by the time I got back it was lunchtime. I turned Bargain Hunt on and watched that as I ate then went and washed my pots and went to watch the end of the programme. One team did quite well. So I managed to see the auctions stage before I fell asleep but fall asleep I did for an hour and a quarter. I didn’t get back tot he computer until 2.15 pm.. That meant a lot of catching up with post having come in to both addresses. It was 4.55 pm before I finished and that seemed an appropriate time to break for my quiz. I had a text from Mike at just gone 6.00 pm so I decided not to return to work. I had a shower at 7.00pm and then Mike arrived at half past with food because he hadn’t eaten with his Dad. He brought some back for me si I was filled a second time today. By 8.00 pm we’d seen Question of Sport and washed the dishes. I wanted to see the Big Bang I’d missed last night  so in between political arguments we watched that and another episode. At 9.00 pm I was going to return to work but was conveniently ill I thought, until a Question Time panel came on to dissect the elections and the disagreements started again. About the only thing we have in common is our dislike of the EU.

I came through and started on the rapidly mounting emails until 10.30 pm which is as late as I dared leave the blog.

That squiggle stole my nut.

That squiggle stole my nut.

See what happens if you try it again.

See what happens if you try it again, you get my fist.

Here I am with PJ.

Here I am with PJ.

Saturday.

I got to bed a little earlier (11.45 pm), read a little less (12.30 am) and probably slept a little sounder too. There was a period of dreaming I remember where there was a chant racing round my head, ‘All hail Somnos small god of your sleep, Porcinus will help you to count all his sheep, Your wishes will be heard by My Brother Jake, If only you cause worshiper records to break.’  It got quite annoying after a while. I think I was very glad to wake up at 4.57 am. I visited Piddletown then came back and logged on. Just the one email address for now,I thought, well that and ebay in case there’s something due. Ebay is clear until almost 8.00 pm. I started on the mail, I knew it was going to take a while. At 6.00 am I thought I’d have some breakfast but when I got through to the kitchen I’d changed my mind again. I started with my sprays and taking my meds then got the mug ready for coffee. Before having coffee though I thought maybe it would be a good idea to see to the rubbish and the recycling. I started with the food recycling which I’m quite sure they don’t do, they just dispose in a different place top general household rubbish. Then it was the large kitchen rubbish bin. I emptied the ash trays into that then added Ju’s flowers which were looking a bit careworn today. Lastly I emptied the little rubbish bins from around the house into it. Naturally the stalks from some of the flowers created holes in the bag which were stabbing me as I walked it to the bin. I was trying not to let it leave a trail of rubbish behind me. Once the 2 bins were out I concentrated on the recycling bags, plastic, tins, glass and paper/cardboard. I got those out by the bins and came back in to wash my hands.

I made myself a coffee and was going to go through and work a little more but the time had slipped round to 6.30 am and I was shocked to hear Mike’s alarm go off. I didn’t think he’s do it 2 weeks on the trot. I’d turned the kettle on as I heard it start and it had boiled before it stopped ringing. Mike turned it off and turned over. I made a coffee for him and took it through. “Coffee’s up bro” I called, coughed and repeated it. There was a garbled response. I left him to it and came back to work. At 6.45 am the alarm went off a second time and I was a bit astounded that he actually got up. That’s 2 A and 1 C , excellent. I finished a few messages and went through to sit with him. I’m not entirely sure what happened next but one moment he was there in pyjamas drinking and the next he was dressed and telling me to get a move on. We were out of the house by 7.10 am and at the Supermarket for 7.30 am. I could hear constant mumbling about “Bloody middle of the night” but it’s best to ignore that and pretend you hear nothing. By the time we’d shopped and reached the tills we were running half an hour ahead of our usual time. We had our usual coffee then Mike decided he felt sick probably due to getting up in the middle of the night. When he returned from the bathroom we started to head for Flint but managed 2 detours. One to Lidl to get a brochure showing next week’s specials and one to a firm called Flintshire Refurbs to see if they had the kind of table Mike wanted. They didn’t, but they did have an ottoman like Muriel wanted so I had to text her.

From there we went to our usual shops and bought some chocolates for Temptations staff, then took them in and ordered drinks. There were only 3 of them in at that time so  we gave them an individual box of sweets each. Mike teased Ceri and demanded a kiss, which he got.On our way out he clicked his fingers at Sian and made the same demand He got the kiss but almost got more than he bargained for because of the clicked fingers. We headed for home to unpack and put away the shopping then paused for breath. we wasted time deciding where to go for lunch before we actually left, neither one of us prepared to make a decision. In the end it was rock, paper, scissors with winner decides. You’ve never seen two people try so hard to lose the game. Unfortunately I lost because I made my play with a pair of scissors and someone cheated by playing paper way behind my go. I decided on the Bells of St Mary’s so I could have roast beef under a mound of potatoes the size of Mt. Vesuvius. Both of us came out of there groaning. In my case it was of a reluctance to loosen my belt a notch in case when lifting my jumper the pressure burst the belt and shot someone.

Mike had a while before the football started so we took a cross country trip to Jackson’s for a wander round and once the stomach aches had gone, a coffee. Mike asked for two Americanos. One two shot and one a single. Such a simple thing but the waitress couldn’t tell us which was which. Mike put his superior nose to the job and decided which was which. He added his usual 6 sugars to his and I added two sweeteners to mine. It took one taste to see Mike’s nose needs retraining (with a whip and a chair I think). His coffee lined my throat, it clung to my vocal chords and refused to budge. Despite telling me he’d hate my coffee with sweeteners and not many of them at that, he seemed happy enough to drink it while I struggled to get breath past the treacle in my throat. Eventually he got up and thumped me on the back causing a chunk of this stuff to fly out, ping of the light fitting and black the eye of a waitress. We came home. It was 4.00 pm before we got in and we each retired to opposite corners to ,in my case work and in his chase a table and chairs on ebay.  When the football match came on at 5.30 pm Mike sat with his tablet in the lounge to watch it while I fought the tide of emails threatening to engulf me. I had to rush as the match would end by 7.30 pm and he wanted my company. I rushed but still 7.30 pm came.

I went through to the lounge and he was hiding behind the door and jumped me. I was tied to a chair in the kitchen and scalped. Then I was forced to the bathroom where my beard disappeared. I’m sure he’s deluded enough to think Summer is coming. Personally I think he just wanted to spoil my chances with the laydeez by making sure they saw more of my face. He’s an evil man. After that I stayed to watch an episode of Big Bang and then a film which ended at 11.00 pm. Imagine if you can the sheer panic of getting the blog out tonight after that. I wish you all a wonderful new week.

 

 

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