Hypnotised by Joey & Given The Bird, by The Bird.

Sunday 20th
Well I got the blog out on time last night and even caught up with my mail before bed at 12.15 am. Lights out at 12.35 am after just a chapter of my book. I even got a lie-in compared to the rest of the week as I didn’t get up until 3.52 am. I paid a visit to the Piddle Palace then came back to make a start on the overnight mail. I was surprised that it wasn’t as heavy a traffic as I’d expected. I was up to date by 5.40 am then promptly fell asleep over the desk, waking at 5.51 am with a crick in my back and my neck. If I’d had warning I could have sat in my chair. I took the new antibiotic then went through to take my morning meds and make a coffee.

I brought the coffee back and found a few more messages had come through. I cleared them then opened my talktalk box and started again. By 7.35 am I was temporarily clear yet again and decided to go sit with Joey and open his cage door. It should be light enough for him to come out now. I opened his door while he stuck his head behind his mirror so I couldn’t see him. I sat down but he didn’t make a move, despite me talking to him…..or maybe because I talked to him. However it did work like a charm on Mike who came through about 8.30 am. My eyes were on their way out, (I think the batteries meed changing) so he had to make his own coffee. When he sat down with it I was fully awake but only for ten seconds then the eyes went again. When he had to nip to the loo, my eyes closed and stayed there until Mike returned. At 9.30 am I forced myself to be alert and went to get dressed.Mike did the flowers and then went to his room to get dressed. At 10.00 am we were on out way to a filling breakfast. I daren’t say how much I had but let’s just guess that it involved half a pig and a loaf of fried bread and toast. Breakfast in The Bells is a treat. Bacon, sausage,fried bread,those horrible potato things in a triangle, fried bread, beans, tomatoes, fried eggs and scrambled eggs. For those who can’t do without there’s even chips. Then as much toast as you want with either jam or marmalade and butter or margerine. Excellent.

Once out of there at 11.10 pm Mike ran me to Holywell to look at Lidl. I got some strawberries and cream for my tea. He brought me home again and at 12.00 pm left to meet with his dad’s doctor. I attacked my mail until 2.00 pm then went through to sit with Joey. I watched garbage on the TV even though Joey wanted wildlife programmes. I had to assert myself before he’s brave enough to land on me and thinks I'[m a pushover. Then late in the afternoon I watched Lewis, an episode I hadn’t seen. While I was there I had some strawberries and cream for tea. I was disappointed there was so much wastage in the strawberries that hadn’t looked bad in the punnet. Joey didn’t accept an invitation to join me which was a shame as I could have eaten less. At 7.00 pm I came back to my mail for a couple of hours and then had a last two hours with Joey who spoke all the way through a film,  before starting on the blog which is mercifully short today.

Monday 21st.

It was a night of two halves. Lights off about 12.45 am after a read but awake again at 1.58 am and uncomfortable. I knew I wanted more sleep and had to try in my chair in the lounge. It turned out I tried Mike’s chair so I could put my feet on the table. I slept. It was 4.09 am before I got up. My feet weren’t on the table anymore and I’d sent nothing crashing to the floor so I was already on a plus, but I must have managed 3 hours sleep so that was a definite plus. So, a trip to the loo then powering the computer up. I started in gmail where I caught some more nice comments on the blog.Once that was cleared I took my meds, had breakfast, put the washing machine on then brought my coffee back so I could take an antibiotic and then start on my talktalk mail. By 7.20 am I was clear again and went to do an inner eyelid inspection until just about 8.00 am. I had to try and coax Joey out of his cage to do a mass clean up and do fresh food/water before Val the warden appears later.

Joey didn’t make any effort to help me until 9.05 am when he shot out of his cage and did a lap of honour squawking all the way. Once he’d settled on the mirror for his usual argument with the other ‘occupant’ I was able to start cleaning the cage and replacing his floor of sandpaper. He doesn’t help by flying off in panic the minute my arms approach the cage even though I talk softly to him. In case there are ladies present I shan’t reveal what I say though. Once that was done and his food and water seen to I could back off. He’s totally unconcerned about that of course and just continues leaving horrible marks on the mirror from where he tries to do a Glasgow Kiss on the other bird. I’m sure he has brain damage now. I should have covered that mirror the day he arrived. At 10.00 am I started watching Homes Under The Hammer but was soon distracted with the arrival of the postman. One I haven’t seen before. He brought a book I won in a competition by my friend (and author) Pamela S Wight, the book is called The Right Wrong Man.  http://goo.gl/XwW3oB  I’m quite looking forward to reading it. I also had another book which I’d ordered from ebay for Yvonne and a Christmas gift for one of my great nieces. Things are going quite well in that direction. There was also a letter about claiming my pension which made me realise how close I am to that age.

At 11.00 am I returned to work and was doing well with my messages when the doorbell went. It was Val who went to the lounge to say good morning to Joey and to chat to me. She was there about twenty minutes and once happy all was well she went on her way with some thank-you chocolates. I had time to return to the messages before lunch. I watched Bargain Hunt and yes,I managed to stay awake for the end, though I did then allow myself a short nap for forty minutes before coming back here to make an effort to keep pace with mail. That wasn’t too difficult today. I stayed here until almost 4.30 pm when I went to start my evening viewing. I had to be prompt tonight as there was an important item coming up on ebay. At 6.30 pm I was back in my bedroom with half an hour to spare. I prepared my top bid, ready to pounce at the ten second mark. Then I got distracted and missed the damned thing but it went for almost double it’s real value and I wasn’t bidding that much. I’d put about 8 items in my basket to think about and suddenly decided to pay for them. Ouch, and then there was another item due at 8.30 pm and I sat for twenty minutes not taking my eyes off the screen just in case. I was not successful but I haven’t given up hope and I do have time.

At 9.00 pm I went through to watch DIY SOS. It was an old one and we weren’t very far in before my eyes blurred (Lousy TV). It was in Wales and way up in the hills in the worst snow in and temperature in years. Locals were struggling to get out of their villages to go and give a hand but one father and two sons drove from Leicester to give their time. As always it was amazing  and a true picture of what people are willing to do  to help those in need. There is still hope for humanity. At 10.00 pm I turned off and said goodnight to Joey, promising to see him in the morning. Here’s hoping I do. It’s my Chester day tomorrow and I’m really not looking forward to the travelling.  I’ve been shaky for a couple of days. I had a look to see if there was anything more on ebay tonight but there wasn’t. I think it might be an idea if I held back now until all the stuff I’ve ordered is here, allocate it and see who is missing before I carry on. That meant I could concentrate on the blog and if time permits on the rest of the mail too.

Tuesday 22nd.

I turned the light off early at midnight because I was so tired. Next thing I know I’m awake and it’s 1.05 am. I didn’t want to get up so paid a visit to the loo then had a cigarette before trying again at 1.16 am. It worked, off I went again until I woke again at 3.07 am and the same tricks weren’t going to work.  I still tried though. The visit to the Piddle Palace yielded little and so I just enjoyed a cigarette before turning the computer on. Once logged on I started on my mail which took until 4.22 am then the talktalk box which took me to 5.11 am. Since this was a little early for my antibiotic and I didn’t want breakfast yet,I was forced to search on ebay again. I had some luck there this morning with some smaller gifts, at this rate I’ll soon be left with just Yvonne and Ugo to puzzle over. After breakfast I returned to my room coffee in hand to check on incoming mail. By 7.20 am I was clear ready to go and catch my bus.

I reached the bus stop without breaking the picture frames I was carrying but it was more luck than judgement. When I got on the bus I tucked the bag in at the side of my leg, placed my chin on the arm grip of my crutches and let myself drift off. The journey was short and no-one tried to talk to me except Howard the driver. Yvonne and Reuben were waiting on the bench when the bus arrived. Once the hellos were out of the way and I was enjoying a post journey cigarette there was a short discussion about where to go. Since Yvonne needed a few things from a Supermarket we decided to have breakfast either in the Supermarket or a little cafe next door. We ended up at the one in store which is a Costa. After we finished I asked if it was possible to get to a shop I like going a different way. Yvonne was sure we could and so we tried. Sure enough we could. It’s a great gift shop full of Chinese/Japanese furniture , plates etc plus some very pretty and unusual gifts. I made a mistake in buying  2 giant candles as gifts and invited both a hernia and a heart attack. Lucky for me Reuben was walking at that time so his buggy bore the weight. We spent our time mooching until finally it was time for my bus.They walked me to the bus stop and since there had been intermittent rain I told them not to wait.

Getting off the bus at home was fun as it’s quite a way to my house. I hadn’t been to the loo in Chester and was getting close to desperate. Dragging half a ton of candle with me meant I couldn’t move at speed and there was no chance I was calling at Pauline’s. I made it home, dropped my bags, threw my crutches away like a Lazarus and shot into the loo. Only after I came out could I store my sticks, get my coat and gloves off, put the candles away and then say hello to Joey. I opened his cage but he didn’t seem to want to come out just then. I had to leave him to it and head for the computer. I worked almost continuously until 4.30 pm when I could put the TV on for my Antiques Road Trip. Joey came out then and made as much noise as he could and believe me that’s a lot. I’d won a few more things on ebay during the afternoon and apart from nipping back at 5.30 pm and 6.15 pm I stayed away until 7.00 pm. I came back and worked until 9.00 pm and then went to watch a film, one of the Superhero ones from the comics of my childhood. Only it wasn’t. I remember Green Lantern and Green Arrow but not Green Hornet. I’m glad too as it might have put me off reading. I gave the film a fair go at an hour and a half but by then I had no nerves left for it to grate on. Truly abominable. Ah well, it gave me chance to come through at 10.30 pm to do the blog. I’m grateful for that.

Reuben with his daytime TV friends.

Who’s chasing whom?

Wednesday 23rd.

My light went off about 1.00 am last night and it didn’t take long to drop off. This morning I got up at…………5.02 am…… Ta da! A wonderful, beautiful unbroken sleep. I didn’t even get up to go to the loo. There are signs I should have (Joke honestly).  I did nip along there a bit sharply once I was up though. It’s been a while since I hovered around the four hour mark and I like it. I opened my talktalk and was in the clear at 5.51 am which was almost perfect timing to go get my meds and some breakfast. I note on the calendar that today is the first day of Autumn. The nights are really drawing in now and according to the shops the Christmas countdown seems to have begun.         After breakfast I took my coffee back to start on my gmail. There were more in both boxes so I worked till they were clear.At 8.00 am I went and opened Joey’s cage and sit with him for a while. I don’t know how it happened unless the little burger hypnotised me but my eyes went. When I woke and looked at the time it was almost 9.20 am. I got sorted and dressed and left to go to Pauline’s. I wasn’t out too long but it was close to 10.00 am when I was back.

After putting the shopping away I went to watch my Homes Under the Hammer. Of course this was the time Joey decided to do a vocal test going from squawk to screech over about the first 20 minutes of the programme. He didn’t even shut up when I spoke to him. Part way through I notice he had no millet so I tried offering that. I noticed there was still plenty on the spray on the cage floor after Mike put some in on Saturday. I carefully put my arm in the cage and picked the millet up, as Joey was flying round the cage like a demented pilot I put the millet back on it’s stand and removed my arm. Joey came out. I’d just settled in my chair hen the doorbell went. It was the postie with four parcels for me. Brilliant. The programme wasn’t getting the attention it deserved but I was having my Christmas early opening parcels. Everything was fine so the minute the programme was over at 11.00 am I came through to leave feedback. One parcel contained 3 items and all were delightful. I carried on there with incoming messages until midday then went for lunch. Corned beef hash today. Very tasty. Of course Bargain Hunt was on while I ate and I managed to stay awake today. After washing up I went back to work. I’d just sat down when the doorbell went again. To be honest I thought it was the window cleaner collecting his money but no, it was delivery of another two parcels. It’s getting to be a very exciting day.

After placing the parcel with the growing Christmas pile I returned to work, needing to have clear mailboxes before Dil comes for games tonight. Wen we finish it’s always hard to cope with the mail and the blog and expect to get to bed too. I was clear before 4.00 pm when I knocked off. I’d have been out sooner if the siren song of ebay hadn’t been heard. Not that I had much luck, I ended up crashing on the rocks today. Dilwyn arrived at 4.30 pm just in time for the Road Trip, he was glad it wasn’t the same dealer as last week so he didn’t have to hear the hissing every time he came on screen again. I bet each one of us must have known someone who makes our skin crawl at some time or other. Tonight both experts were really nice, as they always are, and a pleasure to watch. They both did very well.                                                                             Next up was our quiz where we did very well answering questions tonight though when sports come up all you get from me is a blank face. When 6.00 pm came it was time to get the table out and start playing. The Yahtzee went well and I ended up 4-2 ahead. Sometimes when it’s a draw we carry on for another game but Dil suggested it tonight as my luck should run out. We carried on and it didn’t. The second game was 3-3 giving me the win overall at 7-5. Out came the Trivial Pursuits and we started on that. We each managed to get the six segments which meant I had to answer a sports question, then we both tried to make our way to the middle.                                                       We both managed to get to the middle twice and had a category and question chosen by the other. Dil unfortunately missed out on his which I chose I managed to get the second one he chose for me. Again he left to go home in high dudgeon. I said he’d be better in a car.

After a quick tidy up and a wash of the pots I took my meds and came through to start on the accumulated mail. I’d done by 10.30 pm and was able to deal with the blog. I must have been quick tonight as it’s almost 11.30 pm and I’m almost ready to go to bed. No more mail tonight.

Start of the masterpiece.

Glee.

p.s. Reuben is aboard the rocking donkey I got for his birthday. If you squeeze the ear, it makes donkey noises, hence the smile.

Thursday 24th.

I was in bed before midnight and with light off at just a minute to the witching hour. I’m sure sleep came fairly quickly.. I woke this morning at 2.58 am so had another good night in comparison to some. After lolloping to the loo and back I powered up the computer and signed in. My first job was to check my bank account to see if the DWP have repaid me the £55.50 they acknowledge owing me and which they said they’d pay me as soon as possible. It’s been 7 weeks since they wrote to confirm that. It strikes me that ‘as soon as possible’ is a very flexible phrase. It’s not as though they have to save up to pay me is it? Next job was to check my pension had gone in OK (it had) then I could concentrate on mail. My talktalk account came first and I was clear by 4.10 am and able to head to my gmail which I cleared by 5.00 am. Obviously the mail was still coming in but I was trying to catch it as it did  and not let it accumulate. Also I was trying to use ebay to generate ideas for gifts but it’s very hard as you have to have an idea in the first place to stick in the search box. I recommend you look in Wholesale and Job lots and also everything else, you might have a laugh, especially with the latter.

At 6.00 am I took my morning meds and had breakfast, remind me I need more butter this weekend please. It was too early to open the cage for Joey annd since I’d left the power to the TV on last night I decided to watch Third Rock From The Sun. Eventually it was light enough to let Joey fly about so I opened the cage door and stood chatting to him for a few minutes. He kept his back to me and didn’t respond until with a shrug I shut up. He turned towards me, stood perched on one leg and I swear with the other he flipped me the bird. He’s so uncouth, in fact I bet he never even had any couth. As I backed off he flew out of the cage at speed, did a circuit of the room going very carefully round all obstacles and then did a stop in midair turned 90 degrees and went straight back into his cage. I took my empty coffee cup back to the kitchen and came back to my room to work. I stayed there until 10.00 am, mostly in shock at being flipped and then went back to see Homes Under the Hammer. This time he was glad to see me and wanted some attention. But, as there are no adverts I just gave him the occasional Best Boy, Joey, Joey Joey and concentrated on the programme. He took to nattering loudly with the occasional whistle, or flying circuits of the room and waiting to be told what a clever boy he is. He’s an aeronautical miracle but I wasn’t going to tell him so. Maybe I will the day he lands on me. The postman came and delivered parcels galore , even he was surprised when one more kept coming out of his bag. I had a great time opening them and listing them to leave feedback, I was missing my programme though. One parcel I’ve been expecting still hasn’t come though and I wonder if it’s at the bottom of a postman’s sack somewhere or maybe the custom’s office have stopped it for checking. I want no more bills off them.

At 11.00 am I returned to my battle with the mail and remained there until 12.00 pm. For lunch I had steak in red wine sauce with chips which I enjoyed very much. I stayed awake until after Bargain Hunt, I must have washed my pots at some stage then sat down again. From there it’s all a blank until 1.55 pm. I must have woken up but not even been aware I’d been to sleep.It was like I’d just lost almost an hour. I think Joey is related to Mesmer. Maybe a reincarnation. The post kept me busy until 15.50 pm then I went onto ebay until 4.30 pm when I went to watch the Road Trip. I just stayed there until 6.00 pm. Work called for a while but here wasn’t too much so I was able to disappear again to watch an underground exploration at 7.00 pm for an hour and then at 9.00 pm a fascinating Who Do You Think You Are. A BBC correspondent, injured by a shooting in Saudi Arabia wanted to try and verify some family tales about having come over with the Normans Invasion. He picked up some information on amazing individuals until he reached the point where he was given proof that his family didn’t come over with the Normans Invasion, they were the Norman Invasion.His direct ancestor was William I and the next 7 of his ancestors were Kings too.

At this point I was waiting for Michael to arrive and was starting to get worried. At 10.30 pm I’d remembered to take my meds and as I didn’t want more TV I had the equivalent which was another session on Ebay then at 10.45 pm I started the blog. I was doing quite well too. Mike arrived at 10.55 pm and I had to break away to do the coffee. We had to chat of course about how his week has been which seems to have been very frustrating with messages about his Dad in hospital. I came back to the bedroom at 11.40 pm and Mike followed me to put some cream on my legs, it was either that option or the one where he breaks my wrists so I can’t scratch. Hard decision but I opted for the cream.  I chose to point out some gurgle jugs on ebay then which lasted until 12.20 pm when he left to go to bed and I was able to continue with the blog. Just don’t blame me if I was too tired to make any sense.

Friday 25th.

So I was a little late getting to bed this morning. By the time I’d read one substantial chapter I was ready to go to sleep. I turned the light off at 1.20 am. This morning I didn’t get up until 5.39 am, another 4 hour night. Things are looking up. By the time I’d done the loo Olympics and come back it was getting on for 6.00 am. All I did was power up the computer and then go straight to the kitchen to take my meds and an antibiotic (last day) because of course I have to do my drugs for the week on a Friday morning. I didn’t have breakfast so returned to my room at 6.30 am ready to do battle. Battle was short lived and at 7.45 am I emerged the victor and headed to the lounge to release Joey. I sat and talked to him but he didn’t seem interested in coming out. I get the impression he’s not a morning person budgie. Eventually I gave up and went to get dressed and at 9.00 am I took a walk to Pauline’s for my lottery tickets. She made a mistake today and put an extra one on so I kept it in the hope it’s a lucky one. I’d been back in the hose a few minutes and just settled at the computer hoping to pick off the stragglers from my last battle when I heard Mike’s phone go off. Since I can’t be blamed for waking him at 9.15 am I went to make him a coffee. It sounds like his Dad is ready to go home.

At 10.00 am I went to watch Homes Under the Hammer and Mike got ready to disappear. As he was going the postman arrived with four more parcels. This is proving to be easier than I thought. More expensive but much easier. I still have the fun of choosing too. By the time I’d done all I needed to do it was time to knock off for lunch. I peeled some sweet potatoes then put the sausages under the grill. I remembered to take my pre-foodie tablet but had to dash back to my room for an antibiotic as well. Next the potatoes went in the micro for 7 minutes. When I mashed the potatoes the sausages were almost done. I bunged some baked beans in the micro, dished up the potatoes and sausages then added the beans and a piece of bread and butter. I was ready and so was my meal. Beautifully timed, Bargain Hunt was just starting. Just to prove I managed to stay awake till the bitter end, one team took home £170 and the other team £270. I washed my pots and to save me allowing my fluttering eyelids to come to a rest I returned to the computer. My treat, messages from Australia ! A constant battle in one upmanship on the sarcastic front (which I rarely win) is a real joy.

Things seemed a little slow today so at 3.00 pm I went to sit back in the lounge with Escape To The Country and a natter with Joey. I turned the TV on and that was the last thing I remember until 5.00 pm. So not a happy bunny. I had to dash back to my room and start on the mail, missing my usual quiz but I managed to catch the 6.30 pm Eggheads before going for a shower. Coming squeeky clean out of the bathroom I was in time for a sandwich and Question of Sport followed by Mastermind. I had a message to say Mike was on his way back so I went and caught up on the mail, growled when I realised I’d missed another ebay moment, then went to get Mike’s mug ready for his return. I started watching a comedy called Not Going Out  which makes me smile only because you tend to know what line is coming next all the time. Mike came back while it was still on. I made his drink and w talked about his Dad. He’s still in hospital and they’re arranging for him to go to a home for two weeks convalescence with a view to staying in a home permanently. Mike and I have often said this is what he needs but Mike is fighting with the promise he made to his Dad never to make him go in a home. He wants his independence. There’s a lot of guilt attached to the breaking of the promise even though it’s for the best possible outcome. Other times we’ve maintained he’s OK on his own because of the care workers 4 times a day and the new flat being sheltered accommodation. It’s a very hard decision.

At 10.00 pm I took my meds and came through to do the blog and to get to gripes with the mail that’s come in since I was last here. A body blow that I started winning something with a 10 second nip only to find I lost it by £1 to some terrible person who did a 5 second nip. You just can’t trust anyone can you? It’s going to be an early night.

Saturday 26th.

Well I got my early night and was in bed for 11.30 pm. I put my light out at 12.15 am and settled to sleep, it was soon coming. So was getting up time since at 2.01 am I was awake again. I paid a visit to the loo and came back to power up the computer. After signing in I checked and dealt with the talktalk mail then the gmail. That took me until 3.45 am when I decided to have a quick look at ebay. The quick look turned into a slow look as more ideas came. It was almost 5.00 am before I could tear myself away. I had to clear a few more emails before I could go and have some breakfast and take my meds. It reminded me if I’m going to keep having toast for breakfast I’d better get a huge family size butter. I prepared Mike’s mug then took my coffee back to the computer. When I heard his alarm go off at 6.30 am I made his drink and took it through. I got the usual grunt when I said it was there but no movement. It was only when the alarm went off the second time his twinkle toes beat a path to the lounge where he promptly fell asleep in his chair. I reminded him not to forget his coffee. Grunt. It stands at 2 A and 2 C by my reckoning despite the fact he left his actual bed before the second C. I went to get dressed.

We still managed to leave the house by 7.25 am only it was a very confusing journey. After a conversation yesterday I thought we were going to Morrison’s. Mike went past the exit road so I just said “Changed your mind”? At the next exit he sot off and started backtracking and I suggested he remembered the plans. All I’d been going to get differently from ASDA was my butter on a special. The car was turned again and off we shot towards ASDA. A bloody Mystical Magery Tour. I did the bulk of the shopping in ASDA then we diverted to get loo rolls from another Supermarket, mini jams/marmalade from a further shop and then on to Morrison’s for the one item I actually wanted from there but could have done without. Finally we made it to Flint and Temptations. We were partly served by Kyle who knows what we have and partly by a new face who turned out to be a new Manageress. Ceri wasn’t in. We handed over the chocolates to Kyle and had our drinks and Mike’s teasted toecake then left. Next we went to Prestatyn to the jewellers which was closed last week. Very handy as there was another shop I wanted too. Then to lunch at the CookHouse where we both struggled to finish today after being given pieces of meat as thick as door stops. Lovely, but soooo filling. I managed a trip round the £ Shop and then we came home.

After unpacking the shopping and putting it away I opened two parcels left with Bert while we were out. My missing item is here YAY!  I came through to start on the post while Mike stayed to watch his precious football team play. So far I’ve heard I think three shouts of ‘YES‘ which seemed to indicate they were winning. I later found my guess was correct. Most of the street found out my guess was correct when they finally worked out where the racket was coming from. I went through to join Mike at 5.25 pm when the football was over and stayed there for the evening, enjoying the cakes that are our Saturday treat and me trying to convince Mike that the rhubarb crumble is unfortunately not available for eating tonight as it’s for Monday, meaning  5 minutes after he’s gone on Sunday afternoon. I had to give up on all the fun at 9.00 pm and come to deal with the mail that’s piling up and also the blog. It needs to be ready for the midnight despatch.

I wish you all a Wonderful New Week with Hugs and Dreams come true.

Alien Reuben.