Monthly Archives: September 2016

Oscar Becomes a Hero

Facebook surprise me with memories sometimes. This morning they reminded me of a piece I’d written 5 years ago to the day when I was writing about Oscar. He was just 16 at this point. He lived until just past his 18th birthday and died on Oct 1st 2013. During all that time we’d recorded his battles with the other household ‘pets’ introduced by Julia. The three ‘girls’ who were rats and beautiful and the degus who though delightful to look at had less intelligence than a peanut and who made short work of all the wires in the lounge whenever they broke free.

Anyway, here’s the piece Facebook reminded me of.

How easily things change. One light time I’m all but invisible in the village and the next I’m the flavour of the week. Though of course that’s how it should be really.

I was a little bored and not sure what to do with myself. Outside it was still the dark time and inside there was no light as my ‘The Her’ and ‘The Him’ we’re still asleep. I’d had some fun unravelling all her knitting , I’d ‘borrowed’ a few pairs of socks, I’d even knocked two plants off the ledge by the small clearway but now I was bored. It was time for fun with the Longlegs.

I walked through my home to the room where my ‘The Him’ was in his sleeping place making those funny grunting sounds that my ‘The Her’ hates so much. He looked funny sprawled on his back , arms up above his head and one leg hanging out of the covers. It looked a very handy way up so I got a good grip and ran up the leg to the sleeping place. It might or might not have been the fact that my claws were out that caused the “What the?” that I heard but I’m afraid that was soon cut off as I jumped straight onto his stomach bringing forth an “Ooph.” I lay down and started retracting and bringing forth my claws to make him softer ( it never seems to work) until the arms which had now come from near his head started stroking me. But, if he thought he was going to get back to sleep that way he was wrong. I didn’t start purring as he’d hoped. I moved higher up his body and connected my head with his chin making him lift his head. I was then able to snuggle under his chin. Unfortunately this didn’t seem to please him today, perhaps because I may just possible have been leaning on his windpipe. Totally accidentally you understand.

It took only moments for my ‘The Him’ to decide I wanted something and gently pushing me aside he swung himself off his sleeping place. “Well, what is it you want you rogue?” he asked, probably expecting me to need food. Instead I led him through to the lounge where I made him sit and stroke me for a few minutes. Then, off I jumped and led him to the clearway. “ Hooray!” He said ,”you out and me back to bed.”

That suited me and as the clearway opened out I went. The light time was almost upon us now and I decided to walk to the village. There was no sign of Ginger or the others on my way but there was a lot of fascinating rustling coming from the undergrowth nearby. Lucky for them I’d eaten. I was just level with the Fursty Ferret when I heard a noise. It was a Longlegs scream . It was coming from below the pub. I went to look and the wooden floor outside was open. I could see a female down below shaking with fright at the sight of a rat in the corner. The rat was more frightened than she was but she couldn’t see that.

I jumped down and hissing at the rat I lunged and caught it by the neck. “Play Dead” I told it with a muffled voice, my mouth full of rat hair. It went limp. I jumped out of the cellar and deposited it on the ground. “You’re the pet of that little girl next door aren’t you?” I said, “better get yourself of home before someone comes to check I’ve finished you off.” He ran home quickly and I went to lean over the edge of the floor.

“Oh thank you Oscar” said the female Longlegs as she recognised me.”how brave you are, I shall get you some salmon , wait there.” And wait I did. It was delicious.

I had just started to leave when there was another Longlegs sound of dismay and before me was one of the old ones looking up into a tree where a kitten sat shivering in the branches. I guessed she wanted the kitten down, probably to treat it with some respect as we Superiors deserve but I know that some kittens while good climbers up, are not good climbers down. I climbed up and found this was the case. Once up there, the little female kitten had found she didn’t like the height. Picking her up by the neck as I had the rat I carried her safely down to the ground. The old Longlegs was crying and fussing the kitten who just rolled over on her back to enjoy it. I stood by as proud as I should be until suitable recognition came my way. It did, as the old one finally started fussing me too.

“Oh what a brave, clever cat ( cat ?) you are Oscar” she said, and out of the corner of my eye I saw the now unfussed kitten start heading towards the tree again. “ I won’t come after you a second time” I said “back here now please for another fuss.”

The kitten obeyed and was rewarded with another fuss as promised and I even joined in by licking it.

I carried on strolling but met none of the gang and nothing else happened. Getting bored again I decided to head home for food.

As I arrived back and entered through the clearway I saw my ‘The Him’ with a dish. I followed and found he had put me some fresh chicken out. My ‘The Her’ entered and started stroking me.

“Well Oscar, you have been a busy boy this morning. I’ve been getting phone calls from the village about you.” Before I could deny any wrongdoing,she added “You must be the bravest pussy cat ( why can’t people call us Superiors?)( But of course she’s right about the bravest) in the village.

So, I’m back on top and in favour again in my rightful position. I can’t wait until I tell the rest of the gang later.

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The Knee Jerk Reaction

This was a special weekend for me. Instead of wanting to get home after my shopping I had another destination in mind. Some 5 years ago I was privileged to meet in real life a young writer I’d been corresponding with from America. Patricia (Patti) Carrigan

the-rising

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The second part of the original book Antiserum. Written by my young friend then 15. She was a delight and Ju and I got very close to her. She came to the UK with a delegation from her home town and happened to be calling in at Chester for a short time. We went to meet her there. The time wasn’t long, about an hour, but at the end we all parted with Huge Hugs and the correspondence has continued ever since.
In order to let the family know she was going to be OK and that I wasn’t some predator stalking her daughter I’d also been writing to Patti’s Mom for a while. To be honest, at the end I almost felt like part of the family. Even so, it was a major surprise recently to get a message to say they were coming to the UK. Part business for her husband Tim and part holiday for them both. Would we be able to meet? Tracy knows I’m not good with people and tend to hide away but regardless I agreed. I think just to convince me I wasn’t being stalked Tracy had been in touch with Yvonne to ask to meet them too. They already had tickets to visit Chester Zoo so that was the place we agreed to meet.
Mike and I got there a little before 1.00 pm and finding out Yvonne and co would be a little late we agreed to meet inside by the elephants. We were standing there in the sunshine waiting for Yvonne when I saw two people coming towards us. No mistaking who they were. It was Hugs and handshakes all round. We had a few minutes to natter before Yvonne’s crew turned up so we quickly  discovered a great sense of humour. When we were all together it was time for a coffee so we’d all be able to say hello properly. Reuben promptly disappeared with my crutches, no doubt to shoot some poor unsuspecting alien since he loves Star Wars. Mike brought our drinks to the table and in order to occupy the hands of the octopus (Amelie) Tracy gave her a bottle of  water.
Everything was going swimmingly until Amelie launched the bottle of water and like a magnet it was propelled in my direction. Straight down to my spherical man parts in fact where it landed with a groan. ( I know I heard one). At that point I had a knee jerk reaction which cracked my leg on the underside of the table and an elbow jerk reaction too which sent my coffee into the air only to descend again in a spreading pattern. It covered my leather jacket, my jeans and my tee-shirt as well as he mother’s leg. Mike pointed out I could hold his hand leaving so people would take pity on the one who’d pee’d himself, and even more pity on his carer. Bloody Cheek. I dried out in the sun and we had a great afternoon round the zoo before it came time to leave and go our separate ways.
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                                                                                   Tim, Me, Tracy and some random stranger who stalked us.
On Sunday they were due to go to Llangollen so I was able to give Tracy lessons on how to pronounce the place before she screwed her tongue so she couldn’t eat. I understand they enjoyed a Hot air balloon festival there. Today they’re off to Scotland. It was wonderful to meet them.
Hugs to all.

 

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Today’s special guest; David

As if you didn’t get enough of me…….

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The Saturday Special.

Because we were in the Supermarket at 7..30 am on Saturday morning the crowds were avoided ( for my sake ) and the world was our bivalve mollusc. Mike decided instead of the bacon roll he often has after shopping that he preferred to go straight to Flint and have crumpets at Temptations. It was a bit of a disappointment for him when we had parked up to be told by one of the staff that they weren’t opening until 10.00 pm as the re-vamp they’d done during the week merited a Grand Opening complete with cutting of ribbon. I made sure Mike understood that it was the official ribbon which could be cut and not any other he saw on female hats or in their hair. He can be a bit literal at times, explaining about rock cakes was fun.

Anyhoo, we had 45 minutes to waste. That was fine by me as there were shops open and the only thing they were missing was me. I got some chocolates for the staff of Temptations as usual even though it’s a little like taking coals to Newcastle as they sell handmade chocolates. We did a fair bit of mooching until there was just ten minutes to go and we decided that a cigarette at one of the outside tables would be good. We did that and as expected 10.00 am arrived. In we went and joined a small queue which was building up in the shop section while a barrier of heave purple ribbon stopped us entering the cafe.

It was 10.15 am  when the ribbon was cut and we barged past everyone to claim a table. Newly decorated, new chairs and a posh new fan made the place look very nice. Mike claimed our table with his hat and shot off to the loo while I took my place in the queue at the counter to order coffee. There was no need to get crumpets for him as there were free cakes on the table. My turn came and I handed over their chocolates while giving my order. As I turned to sit down it was delightful to see our local celebrities Adam and Richard, the brothers who sing a lot of opera.

I knew my niece Karen would be jealous if I spoke to them so naturally I sought Adam out to chat to, he knows me well. To make things worse I got Mike to take a picture of us together on his phone and send it to Karen. She came back asking if I’d got their autographs which I had, on the inside of one of their CD’s. I should be in favour next time In see her.

After eating all the free cake and the biscotti we drove to Holywell to pick up some hot pork baps for lunch and went home. Normally I wouldn’t be allowed to go home so early but Manchester United were playing early afternoon in a derby with their great rivals Manchester City. I was able to catch up on work and then fall asleep in front of the TV while Mike was in his bedroom streaming the game.

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That’s Adam on the left of the picture with Richard on the right with some scruffy beggar in the centre.

Their last album

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Hugs to all.

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An opportunity to meet new friends.

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