I have returned from my holiday to find I have been usurped. In a large cage in pride of place are two animals that should never be seen in the home of a self respecting cat like myself. RATS of all things. Worse still the longlegs have tried to humanize them by giving them names, Penny and Amy. I ask you, who gives names like that to rodents?

I am trying to rise above the situation by pretending I don’t see them or better still that I am ignoring them. After all I don’t want anyone to think senility is setting in…..which it obviously is with my longlegs. How dare they bring these creatures into my home after all the years I spent hunting them as pests and now they drop an ‘S’ and call them pets. Absolutely ridiculous.

It is a little funny though that I can walk into the room and watch them eyeing me up to see if I’m about to pounce. They stop whatever they’re doing to watch me as I studiously pretend to ignore them. hey’re quite funny really and from the corner of my eye I can see their antics. Penny is a thief of any food that isn’t nailed down and in that I include anything that happens to be in her sisters hands at the time. This morning I saw her fly down the ramp from the penthouse carrying a peanut in it’s shell. She deposited it on the ground floor in her cache then shot back up her ladder to the first floor to see if there was anything for her from the longlegs, No? So she shot straight up the ramp to the penthouse and pinched the nut that Amy was trying to open. That also went down the ramps to the store leaving neither of them with anything to eat until those silly longlegs gave them another one each. And how undignified the longlegs are with their constant
” Hello beautiful Penny, who’s a pretty girl” etc. when in fact I’m the beautiful one around here and they should be giving me treats and hugs now I’m back.

I believe a few sessions of missing my litter tray are in order to regain me some attention or the gang will be laughing at me soon. I think I may also train the rats to co-operate with me in a finger nibbling session when the longlegs place their hands near. I will leave them in peace in exchange for that and the longlegs will see I’m the one they need to take care of from now on.

Teatime for rats.

Teatime for rats.


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74 responses to “Usurpers

  1. This has me rolling, OMG, rats. I can certainly understand why Oscar is incensed. LOL. really a rat drinking tea, now thats a first. This is precious, well Oscar I can certainly understand your tyrade. This really made me smile. thank you David and Oscar for such a fun post.

    • Hi Suzanne, the girls had something Oscar lacked….table manners. The picture was actually of my favourite, Priya who was very loving and had great fun running in and out of pockets or relaxing across shoulders. Oscar could have learned a lot. He was very jealous of their dexterity I think.
      I’m delighted to have made you smile.That makes me smile too.
      xxx Massive Hugs xxx

    • That’s a definite ‘It won’t be happening’ unless someone else want to borrow the stories and write it. I have trouble stringing a sentence together these days and couldn’t do a book.

  2. Yes, it must have been a shock to the system. I remember you talking about them but they were before my time. Thanks, David!

  3. Thanks, David. This was very entertaining. I liked the tea time picture. I hope you have your bubonic plague shots.

    • Thank you John. Breakfast was always shared toast or cereal with delicate drinking of the tea. Almost a ceremony.
      Of course I had my shots though the girls were more likely to catch something from us than the other way round. Colds were awful. They are beautiful, loving, intelligent creatures.

  4. New York is full of rats which are usually larger and bigger than my cat Sylvester. Being that they carry disease and germs they would not make good pets!!

    Pizza Rat

    Rat Love Song


    What most of us have dreamed of doing to our evil bosses!!

  5. Want to write a “charming” pet book for the grandkiddies, David? You’ve got your title–TEA TIME FOR RATS–and a great cover picture. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I’m still smiling at John’s “I hope you have your bubonic plague shots,” but yikes and eeeek.
    Have a terrific plague-free week. Hugs!

    • There won’t be a book from me Marylin though I admit that is a great title. Maybe someone else will do one.
      The girls are good at grooming and are very clean so they probably needed shots more than I did against the common cold.
      I’ll have a terrific week if you will.
      xxx Sending Ginormous Hugs xxx

  6. Usurpers? Is that that the best you can do?. I say when the back door opens, shoot them out. What a calamity. Tea time? Where’s yours? o_O
    ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€

    • Ha, if the back door had opened it was more kike they’d gang up and shoo Oscar out so Amy could eat his food. Oscar enjoyed cold tea on saucer but the girls were far more refined than that.
      They were beautiful Tess and never once acted like an alarm cat, getting me up for the hell of it.
      xxx Huge Hugs xxx

  7. Some feline is thoroughly displeased and I can’t help but laugh. Oscar accept my sympathy ๐Ÿ˜

  8. Ah, Oscar. He was a gent with dignity. ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. Ha ha! We give rats names in my family too! Mega

  10. I like Marylin’s title, too. I’m sure the book could be charming, but I will have to take your word about the actual girls themselves. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Like humans they sometimes had odd little moods an some were more loving than others. They’re very intelligent and funny and quite happy to curl up with you. I liked Priya but I loved Bernie, never has there been a more loving rat who liked to sit on my shoulder and nuzzle my ear. She was just beautiful. Having said that, degus are also very pretty but not at all loving and very destructive on open wires.I don’t miss them at all.
      xxx Ginormous Hugs xxx

  11. My daughter had a pet rat once. It was a nice little animal. She gave it dog food and it gorged and began getting so overweight we had to stop and go back to his regular food. Cute story. ๐Ÿ™‚ — Suzanne

    • I never fancied trying the dog food, after all I wouldn’t eat it. Amy did once eat Oscar’s cat food though. We used to buy all the propietary rat food and fresh fruit but also small amounts of what we had if it was sandwiches or cereal.
      xxx Huge Hugs xxx

  12. Ali Isaac

    Sorry, but I’m in agreement with the Cat here… I just dont see the pleasure in keeping rats as pets. ๐Ÿ˜

  13. Three words , . . I’m with Ali. ๐Ÿ™‚ xoxoxo

    • What, you’ve moved to Ireland??????? I can’t believe her cat is influencing you too not to LOVE my little girlies. Once seen you’d be hooked. Just go see the baby ones at your local pet shop and look for a pied one. Instant adoration.
      xxx Hugs Galore xxx

      • I’m afraid I’m going to have to pass, lol. My biggest fear is the rodent family, lol. Peace and love! ๐Ÿ™‚ ((((((still sending hugs)))))):) โค

  14. Subtle but effective reminder jealousy never did anyone any good – just eats one up ๐Ÿ™‚ Many hugs David ๐Ÿ™‚

  15. Yikes, David. This brought back memories of the book ‘The Rats’. I can understand Oscar’s frustration, especially if they were nicking his food. ‘Teatime with the Rat Girls’ sounds like the kind of story that could go either way.
    Mega hugs to you.

  16. Oh RATS!! Hahaha you do make me laugh, David. Have a cuppa with a rat, that’s something new. Hugs

  17. This made me smile, I know, usually rats don’t make people smile, but a friend of mine had a rat named Suzie and she was a peach. I see they like tea, I don’t blame them, I like it myself. Sometimes being usurped can be fun. ๐Ÿ˜‰ Thanks you, dear David, for the smiles, we all need them right now. ๐Ÿ™‚ Massive furry hugs xox

    • I’m glad it made you smile. The girls always used t make me smile. Tea and toast always went down well though a bit of biscuit would do just as well. I’m glad you had the opportunity to see your friend’s rat, so you know just how beautiful and bright they are.
      I may keep the Oscar pieces coming for a while until times seem a little brighter….perhaps I’d better start writing again.
      xxx Ginormous furry hugs back to you xxx

  18. Just the light, relaxed read I needed today, David. Thankyou.
    I’m not overly fond of rats, but this one had me smiling.

    • I’m happy you enjoyed it Damyanti. Rats have a bad rep which is earned by the wild variety but those bred as pets are not just friendly, intelligent and very clean they’re just beautifully varied too.
      xxx Massive Hugs xxx

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  20. Hi Oscar!
    Pleased to meetcha’ and I feel your pain – as the 2-legs say. I keep those rats with the fluffy tails out of the house by frightening them up the trees anytime I catch Mom even looking their way. I don’t get out without her and I think she’s too ADD to organize bringing them in while we are away. I hope so, anyway.

    My mom’s friend always has a rat or two at house – along with a dog or two — but THIS is *my* domain! (Hers are white, btw – the rats, not the dogs). I’m not keen on sharing my treats – or Mom’s undivided attention when she finally steps away from this computer to sit on that white chair that makes noises when she gets up.

    This is Tink, btw, taking advantage of an unguarded computer while Mom is doing something in the kitchen she calls “nuking the coffee.” I just started blogging too – doing my bit to help the 2-legged bloggers who don’t have the good sense to watch and learn from how WE stay connected with our world. [“Blogging Tips from a Shih Tzu” was my first ever post]

    I’ve been looking for blogging fur and feather friends to fill up the “Related Posts” section Mom insists I include on anything I write to “follow her format” (which never seems to go anywhere, but whatever). Anyway, I’ll go back and add a link here – so get David to watch for a ping.

    From now on, if you see one of my guest posts on Mom’s blog and have written anything that I can link to – even dimly “related” for now, be SURE to leave me a link in a comment so I can move it up. So far I’ve met blogging dogs and one pig named Bacon, but you’d be my first blog-buddy who is a cat. (The 2-legs could learn a lot about welcoming diversity from us!)
    Woof! Tink

    • Hello Tink, It’s quite unusual for me to be talking to a dog. Very often I don’t have any breath left from the exercise I take trying to avoid getting too close to a dogs mouth. Still, they say exercise is good for you. Those rats with fluffy tails are called squiggles and they’re not too bad, though a bit cheeky. They’re not the rats and mice I usually have anything to do with when it comes to hunting, but here’s where the two legs are not rational. I bring them presents of rats and mice and I get screams and told “Bad Oscar”yet here they are bringing their own presents into the home and calling them ‘The Girls’. And, they say I’m not to play with them which I might have dome before Penny and Amy started looking at me as though I was on a menu. Penny is almost white like the rats at your Mom’s friends Amy is white with some black patches then they got Bernie who is pied and always trying to be friends with everyone and Priya who is dark brown like the rats I meet outside sometimes.

      I’m very good at using the computer now as soon as no-one is looking, I sometimes do an advice column but that’s generally for cats. But I’m happy to talk to most anyone.As you say, the two legs could learn a lot from us both about blogging and about the diversity of our friendships.Can you believe that David who also uses my computer has no idea what a ping back means. He’s very slow on the uptake poor lamb.Talking of lambs, no, that’s a story for another day. It’s nearly what he calls four o,clock in the morning and I’m peckish so it’s time to go and tickle his feet with my claws till he gets up and puts something different in my dish. Sometimes I just lie on his face until he moves, that one is fun. Yes, I know there’s food in my dish but I have a fancy for something different and he shouldn’t sleep through that.

      Very nice to meet you Tink. No doubt we’ll see each other again.

      • Helloooo Oscar!

        I hope you filled David in that a ping is what gets sent from a link on one post (like mine) to notify the other that their wisdom is being spread around the universe. (sheesh – two-legs!)

        It works best (and easiest), Mom said, from one site to another. Since David has to approve comments, he’ll also have to approve pings – then they’ll show up as if they were comments. Sort of. Anyway, they add to the comment count. He can click it to go see where it came from – in this case, ME!

        My mom can sleep through ANYTHING – like she’s dead or something. I just have to wait until she wakes up on her own to go sit on that white chair that makes the noises when she stands up – not that she’s good for much of anything good for ME until after she’s had her first pot of coffee. She blames it on something called a sleep disorder.

        HEY, when I can sneak time to do it, I’m drafting a post as a surprise for Mom – comparing agility training to Group Coaching – like for Mom’s clients and students, not for sports or anything that sounds like much fun to me (even tho’ SHE laughs a lot when she’s wearing that head-thingie – and I get bribed with a lot of treats to stay still and quiet while she chats with her imaginary friends).

        Do you have anything about training I could use as one of my links? I mean, you must have had to train David, right? Did you blog about it? Or WOULD you?

        Oops, gotta’ run – I just heard the door slam on that kitchen box where she goes to put the cup of coffee she ignores when she’s on her computer.

        Woof! Tink

      • Hi Tink, well I tried. He seems to think a ping is the noise you get when the microwave finishes. Now I’m perfectly prepared to leave that as the case provided the contents are for me.
        David says the only reason he sleep just two hours night is due to me.( I’ll take a short bow here)There was never any official training. Since I’m a superior it’s only natural that the two legs (whom I call the long legs in case I slip up)naturally defer to me and are suitably grateful for the opportunities I offer them to worship me. One the rare occasion a little extra training is needed I generally only have to flex my claws. For instance if Davis should mistakenly think he can sit in the chair I’m occupying, I look at him, flex the claws a few times and he remembers an appointment for his rear end elsewhere.When he’s reluctant to do something (like get out of bed) I may run my claws across the soles of his feet or should it be necessary I can use them to put a barcode on his leg. I do tend to put some distance between us when that happens though.His bite can be worse than his growl.

        Like your Mom, he likes his coffee first thing. I don’t know what’s in it but it seems to make him more amenable for the rest of the day.
        It sounds like you have some very good ideas for your Mom, I hope she appreciates them.If not, lay the blame elsewhere.I do. The rats must be good for something. I think a training manual might be better coming from you as you don’t immediately draw the natural obedience a cat does or carry the natural deterrents for when things go awry.

        I understand you’re having a break for a few days. Enjoy yourelf and try some eye to eye mind control while you’re away. You never know, your long legs may be more perceptive than most.

        Your friend

      • A break? In addition to my article on Group Coaching, I just got volunteered to write one describing what it’s like to live with somebody who is asleep and awake at really weird times – and not just because I wake her up after only a few hours. (As if!)

        It’s after 3 AM where we live, and she’s still going strong How am *I* supposed to get anything written if she hogs the computer all night long? I can’t get much done during her quickie jaunts to nuke the coffee. I have to jump down and look innocent the minute I hear the ping that warns me of her return.

        How that coffee thing works is a mystery to me — never got to try it myself. Mom says it’s poison for dogs. Whether that’s true or something she made up to keep it all for herself — like that chocolate she hoards — I suppose I’ll never get to even taste it.

        That ping thing is confusing to me, too. How is it that the two-legs SEE sounds? And they think we are the strange ones! Anyway, I just heard one with my ears, so I’m going to pretend I’ve been napping in my donut bed next to the computer.

        Your friend Tink

  21. Ha ha the cat’s jealous of rats. Too funny, David.

  22. A rat drinking the tea surely it’s something different …n your thought patterns are really not cliche

  23. Poor Oscar. Usurped by rats, named ones at that. I hope he didn’t miss the littler tray too often!

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  25. The rats are so cute and Oscar is so funny!

  26. I enjoyed reading this one, David.
    xxx Huge Hugs xxx

  27. Sweetness. My Luke did that. He loved to eat at the table. xxxx

  28. OMG, my worst nightmare. At one point, I was afraid to look at the traps in the basement…๐Ÿ˜ฎ

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