Strange Start to the Day.


Something strange is going on. I can’t quite put my paw on it but my whiskers are bristling and that’s a sure sign. Of course it could also mean that a great wet is coming from the sky as well, but I don’t think it’s that.

We all know I creep into this room once my ‘The Him’ has left so I can leave a note for all my fans out there who understand how to treat Superiors and like to know what I’m doing.

Let me start by saying I got up this morning and all seemed fine, well as fine as it can be with two interlopers in the house. I refuse to call them guests since I certainly didn’t invite them. There really are times when the Longlegs shouldn’t be allowed out on their own. Still, I’m sure I got my message across to them the other day and they won’t tangle with me in a hurry. Anyway, I was up. I didn’t feel like walking in the direction of the lounge just then so I thought I’d pay a little visit to my ‘The Him’. I was shocked to find he was already up too and working on the writing box that I ‘borrow’ to speak to you all. As I got closer I could hear him huffing and puffing as his fingers tapped harder and harder. P L E A S E S T O P S E N D I N G M E H O R O S C O P E S he stamped out saying it out loud as he wrote. I have no idea what they are but anything starting with horror can’t be good. He saw me and leaned down “Hello Oscar old boy” he said, “do you want your breakfast?” And without being asked too.

He carried my dishes through the lounge to the food room, passing by the cage with the rats as I followed him. He put the thing on that makes water hot and then instead of scratching my ears while we waited he took some crunchy things from a packet and went to feed the rats FIRST!! BEFORE ME!!!!!!! His paw was at a funny angle passing things through the bars and before I could warn him that he’d get pulled into the cage, one of them took the titbit from his pinched fingers as the other one got a grip on another finger with her teeth. I expected a squeal, either from him at the pain or her as he squashed her for her cheek, but no, he laughed and said “Patience Penny, yours is here” and gave her a treat. He’s obviously gone mad or they’ve hipnippertised him.

He did my dishes and gave me breakfast. Then I saw him put some bread on to brown for himself and make himself a drink. He carried my dishes through and I left him to his meal while I had mine. As I came back there he was feeding them the crusty bits. I left in disgust and went to see my ‘The Her’.

I had just settled down when my ‘The Him’ came through with a drink and a plate of browned bread. “Thank you Dear ” she told him, “but please take it through to the lounge and I’ll join you there so I can feed the girls the crusts.” He swivelled round and headed back saying “Righto my Dear”. The world has gone rat mad. Do they not know these are rodents in the house of a Superior? It’s unheard of, or at least it should be.

After a little nap I went through to ‘borrow’ the writing box to tell you all of the indignities I’m suffering and there on the place where I tap I found hair. Rat hair, where I work. Please don’t tell me they’ve escaped. But I looked carefully about and couldn’t see them. I made my way to the lounge and there they were still caged up. I was just breathing a sigh of relief when they noticed me. One of them smirked while the other one just put her head down and crunched into a peanut shell. It was very unnerving.

I’ve come straight back through to tell you all about it as I don’t understand how these hairs got from that room to this and up onto the table where this box sits. If anyone has an answer please let me know, and if anyone would like two rats just let me know.


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95 responses to “Strange Start to the Day.

  1. Oh-oh… I hope Oscar doesn’t get on Craig’s List and try to sell the ratties. 🐱 Mega hugs my friend.

  2. I am at a loss for words. Lol! Tell ‘Him’ I said your tale is purrfect πŸ™‚

  3. I think the rats may have a way out of the cage. No I don’t want them.

  4. Lucky he doesn’t know that they can type too…

  5. Bloody sinister these scary hairs and all following random horrirscopes. I’d say they were linked in some bizarre metaphysical way.

    • That’s very ‘The ides of April’ there Geoff. Funny, until now the thought never crossed my mind that maybe he was responsible for all the Horrirscope offers I used to get from Mystic Mog.

  6. It really is such an indignity for poor Oscar how the him and her dote on the rats. I love Oscar and have a new found respect now that I know he can use a computer as well, LOL!! I howeled when I saw ” hipnippertised” Percy looked at me like I lost my mind,

    • Blimey, it’s not like Oscar wasn’t doted on too. It’s just as well we didn’t have a horse there too as he might not have had a look in then. Ju was horse bonkers.
      Poor Percy having to wonder that, in this house one look at me and he’d have known for certain. I’ve been looking for it for ages.
      Thanks for reading and finding the laugh Suzanne.
      xxx ending Gigantic Hugs xxx

  7. Priceless, David! Imagine feeding the “rats” first. Humph! Hugs, my friend.

    • It seems the easiest way may not be the best way eh Mary J. It’s so easy to be in trouble when you live with a cat.
      xxx Massive Hugs xxx

      • I had a cat once for two weeks. He came on Halloween night and two weeks later, he slipped away into the night as quickly as he had appeared. In the meantime, he tried to get into the fish tank without success. I do have three grand-felines. πŸ™‚ Enjoy your week, David.

      • Ah, a kitty kat holiday break eh. Different food, different bed and a different perspective on things like trying to get at fish in the tank. I’m glad the fish survived.
        xxx Ginormous Hugs xxx

  8. Ditto with Elaina’s comment. This is puuurrrrfect! πŸ˜‰

  9. There is nothing that equals the indignity of a cat! I’m glad you let Oscar write.

    xxx cat hugs xxx

    • I can’t claim to have ever let him write Anne. He never sought permission for anything he did as everything was his right. Superiors work on different rules than us mortals.
      xxx Huge Hugs xxx

  10. There’s a law – cats before rats! (Cats before everything else really) All cats know this, no wonder poor Oscar was discombobulated by the behaviour of the Her and Him!!

    • Yes, cats first , last and everything in between. They have no concept of spreading the affection.Oscar was Ju’s boy when he was the only pet in the house but I think I was more in favour of the poor field mice he brought home.
      xxx Mammoth Hugs xxx

  11. It seems you know where you stand now in pecking order. LOL Sorry I can’t help you with the hair. But do know I don’t want your rats, LOL ((((Big Hugs)))))

  12. Oh dear. Much as I love cats, I do think (pet!) rats are cute too. (Sorry!) I think you should all try and get on. With all your combined brainpower, you’d soon be running the place.

    • They ran the place anyway Bun even without combining brain power. We were all expected to be in the sway of Oscar who knew the house was his and that was as far as his rues went ‘Mine’!
      The rats could have done anything they were so intelligent but settled for ten meals a day.
      We were allowed to think we were actually in charge because it suited them.

  13. Ha! Poor Oscar, second place to a couple rats. Cats are indeed Superior! Mega hugs, David. πŸ™‚

    • Oscar never took second place except in his imagination which is where I’m afraid the thought of being superior rested. In reality, the rats could have run rings round him they were so bright.
      xxx Hugs Galore Diana xxx

  14. I have a suspicion the game is apaw, I mean, afoot and this tail might have a hairy ending. πŸ˜‰
    Thank you, dearest David, for allowing your furry friends to make us smile, hope the week treats everyone kindly, everyone. πŸ˜‰
    Massive ratty catty superior hugs xoxoxo

    • I’m so glad the furry ones make you smile Donna. I know I must have done something right for once and maybe I can feel a bit Superior for a change.
      xxx Huge Unlimited Hugs to you xxx

  15. Poor Oscar. What’s a desperate cat to do? o_O O_o

  16. I laughed when I didn’t think I could … AND I learned a delightful new word — hipnippertized! Thank you! BIG hugs!

  17. Be careful, David, Between the rats and the cat they might mutiny and take over. That’s one talented cat. πŸ˜€ — Suzanne

  18. I reckon Oscar could do with a bit of Valium daily for a while, you know – sort the nerves and bother out the way The Him or The Her might – otherwise he may contract an ulcer or something if the rats don’t leave soon or he gets to like them…nail-biting suspense with Oscar…

  19. It must be terrible for you, Oscar. I don’t know why the Him and the Her didn’t get guinea pigs, though. :hugs:

    • Heavens Jemima, a cat (who treated me as a servant), the rats, the degus, a horse and you wanted me to add guinea pigs to the zoo? The Longlegs needed room too.
      xxx Massive Hugs xxx

  20. Poor Oscar. Difficult times are afoot. Thanks, David. πŸ™‚

    • Many thanks Olga. Perhaps as a psychologist you might analyse your response and tell me why you ( and others) focus on saying Poor Oscar and never once poor Longlegs who has to pt up with all the shennanegins.
      Answers on a postcard please.
      xxx Massive Hugs xxx

  21. We’ve had mice in the walls (100-yr-old house) and even the kitchen until we got ahead of the problem, so don’t feel bad, David.

  22. So funny! I love hipnippertizing. That’s genius.

  23. Poor Oscar. πŸ™‚

    Hugs, David!

  24. Nothing like pet jealousy, with two cats, rabbits, hamsters, a tortoise, a budgie and a lizard, the alpha cat looked very indignant most days πŸ™‚

  25. Haha! I’m sorry to say no rats are needed here ~ and I don’t want any rat hair either!! Oh your writing amuses me, David πŸ™‚

  26. Sitting at an airport being entertained by you and HIM. Thank you for this fun tail, ur, tale.

  27. Maybe the rats have dug a secret tunnel to the writing box? Maybe they watched the movie ‘The Great Escape’? It’s usually on the speaking box around this time of year.
    Another lovely tale, David. So heartwarming, and Oscars tales always bring a smile to my face and give me that feel good factor.
    Friday Hugs to you.

  28. Pure silliness and oh what fun, David. This is so well written, I always love your perspective, my friend~~

  29. Enjoyed that look at the household world through Oscar’s eyes, it must certainly have an emotional effect on him seeing Rats caged in his own domain.
    Wishing you all the best for a convivial harmonious household.

  30. Kev

    Lol… hipnippertised… love it! 😁

  31. I propose we have a Soul Train line Dance Off competition between the rats and Cats. Here is the perfect song for them to Boogie! There’s a Party Over Here!!

    Fonda Rae — Over Like A Fat Rat

    Time to Trip the Light Fantastic!!

    • While the sound of anything Soul Train is good for me and the beat of this record is good to move to I couldn’t ever play it here. Oscar would smirk and call the girls names while the girls would be offended by the title.I think something like Celebrate (Good Times) by Kool and the Gang might be a better one to make them want to win.
      xxx Hugs to you DeBorah xxx

  32. Heartafire

    I am hooked, your story telling is amazing!

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