Car Booty & Priya and Penny Depart

Sunday. Since Mike’s phone said thunderstorms today and mine said very overcast, both for the same area we felt justified in going out in short sleeved shirts and lightweight jackets. We were not disappointed. Maybe we didn’t tempt fate by putting the top of the car down but we did travel mainly with the windows fully down. Very handy too when Mike’s stomach isn’t up to much. We traveled into sunny Cheshire to the hidden ( shopping) village of Blakemere for a car boot sale. It may not have been as big as our local one at Rhuddlan or even the Countess of Chester Hospital one we went to last week but this was Cheshire and the goodies on offer were good. There were a couple of things I’d love to have got for Reuben if only they hadn’t been PINK, his father wouldn’t have approved at all. But I did manage to get a great pop-up tent and also a crawl through tunnel that also fitted onto the tent.

For myself I found a wooden hand which could hold a candle but also ( and this is what I’ll use it for) an incense cone, a wooden box with a Buddhistic image in gold on the lid. I paid £2 for the latter item and later saw them on sale at £12.99 in the shops at Blakemere. I also bought two nice ( and expensive) tapestries at £1 each. I got a really nice CD/Radio player that Mike wanted for just £4. All in all a very productive morning. I also found but didn’t buy a game called Scrabble Trickster which allows players to get cards which lets them among other things, spell a word backwords, put a word on the board wherever they want, turn a tile over and use it as a blank and steal the previous player’s last score. What a game that could be. I’ll have to think about it though I’m actually half regretting not getting it now.

 

Scrabble Trickster

 

 

 

 

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Naturally our first stop after the car boot was the cafe scratch that, loo, after which came the cafe. A nice cuppa revived us for a walk round the shops. Two fantastic shops which sell imported items, mainly wooden from Indonesia and Thailand, 2 antique shops, a craft place, a huge pet shop, complete with some pets, I think there’s a baby shop( though I’m fairly certain you can’t buy or sell babies there) and then an attractive courtyard filled with shops with gifts, a tea room, an ice cream place, sweets and various gift places. It’s a great place to visit though I aim that more at the ladies than the gents, Mike says I must be more in touch with me feminine side but the sarky beggar forgets it was his idea to go the last twice.

It took an hour to get back home and on to lunch at The Ivy. Yes, today I remembered the chocolates. Shella was back at work after hurting her back and we had a nice chat. Angie was there and Mike put a smile on her face with a Terry’s chocolate Orange I got yesterday. The meal was lovely, though very filling. My first ever panini which was filled with road beef, fried onions and mushrooms and a dish with coleslaw,( I didn’t have the cheese and the horseradish sauce Mike had) , a small side salad and some chips. I didn’t know paninis were so big. Neither of us could manage lemon meringue pie which was perhaps as well since by the time we’d let our belts out a notch there was just one piece left and I’m not noble ( or daft) enough to say “After you bro”. I did leave there disappointed though. Oh, not because I didn’t get my hugs, there was no problem on that score. Yesterday I’d asked Tariq if he could put some glass into a picture that Yvonne had bought me and which had been damaged for some time. Tariq does all his own framing so has a lot of glass about. He made me shake hands that he wouldn’t argue about accepting the money for lunch (YAY) on the understanding that I only paid him for materials and not for his labour. Reluctantly I agreed after getting agreement he would take payment. After the job was done he told me the charge was 55p which is probably about 35c U.S. The man is a horse trader. I shall think of some way of getting a gift.

Mike ran me home and disappeared quite quickly. ( I have that effect on people) giving me the chance to catch up on the 132 messages in my box. That took a while and it was nearly 6.00 pm when I went through t wash up from this morning and then to watch an episode of Midsomer Murders for relaxation. At 8.00pm I came back through to start again.

Monday. Not every day starts with good news. I’ve heard from Jo, one of my wonderful nieces that Penny and Priya (pictured) have departed to join Ju so they can play inside her dressing gown again. You’ll remember no doubt that Jo took over looking after all four of our special girls after Ju passed away. Amy and my beautiful Bernie passed away a while ago  so now the last two have gone to join them. So sad.

Priya enjoying her morning cuppa Tea. R.I.P

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Feeling unwell today I went back to bed after doing my mail and then carrying out kitchen duties. I was woken by a knock on the door, not that I knew that’s what it was at the time. Only when I sat up and my mind began to work ( despite what A C Flory says) did my mind begin to twig some poor soul was stood on the doorstep. It was my nephew David ( do I really have a nephew approaching 50?) and there he stood despite me telling him just to walk in. He’d brought a batch of Sheet Music dating from around 1905 for me to see. There was only one that meant anything to me by Gen. Lew Wallace , the theme tune to the book he wrote ‘Ben Hur’. It had a very frameable cover as did some of the others. I wasn’t able to help him really as I know nothing of music other than some I like, some I don’t. I suggested taking it to a specialist music shop as they may be interested in displaying it or even playing it.During the time we were chatting David reminded me he’s promised last week to buy me lunch today and despite my saying there was no need he went off to the sandwich shop for some filled baps. He also went shopping for me to Pauline’s. As soon as he mentioned the brand and his Uncle ‘Dave'(I hate it) she knew who it was and just said “100?”.   David was taking one of Ju’s prized horse figures today for himself but I also found some old jewellery boxes filled with costume jewellery he could take for the stall. I finally got dressed !

David was due to be home for 1.00 pm but while we were talking about car boots I’d told him of the two tapestries I go yesterday and he asked where I was putting them. I explained where and why and that I’d bought a pole to put them on as well. He offered to do the job there and then. I refused as it was already 12.25 pm but he said it took no more than 20 minutes to drive home.(They haven’t invented a car that fast yet except in F1). We did the job regardless and I’m afraid i was 1.00 pm before he left so I hope the motor mechanic at his end was a patient man.

I came back to the computer to clear what I could and was forced to go to my chair at 2.45 pm. I had my lunch but by 3.45 I was asleep again. I woke just in time for my 4.30 pm Antique show and then came back to mail at 5.15 until 6.00 pm. I’ve managed to stay pretty much abreast of it today somehow. I watched TV from 6.00 to 8.00 pm and then came through for the night sessions. I’d had a text from Mike to say he’s been granted an exchange on his flat so he’s moving as we speak and won’t be down this weekend. That will be good in a way as he’ll be with his son for Father’s Day. If he does finish moving early, he and his son will be going to Manchester to fix his Dad’s washing machine, otherwise it could be the next weekend and I’ll have two very quiet weekends. At least he won’t be moaning I’m getting him up in the middle of the night for shopping.I won’t get any done. I’ll still be going to the Ivy though for my Father’s Day treat.

Tuesday. After finishing my mail this morning I became tired and nodded off in my chair in the lounge. That was about 6.30 am and I didn’t wake until almost 9.00 am. I doubt I’d have moved if it hadn’t been for the repeat prescription request lying in front of me on the coffee table. I got washed and dressed before dropping it off with the chemist and went straight back home as I wasn’t going to Yvonne’s today. The air had revived me enough to stay awake long enough to catch up on the mail again. Four messages suspending my online account with Santander. Do these moronic con men think I’m more likely to believe a message if I read it more often? The postman came with a new batch of keyring blanks for me and I was able to make up nice ones for my nieces.

By 11.00 am I was tired again and back to the chair I went. Zonk, I was out till 12.00 pm and though I didn’t feel like lunch I made something anyway. There was a made for TV film on at half past which I watched till it ended at 2.20 pm when I thought I’d better make serious inroads into the mail or I wouldn’t see my Antiques Show at 4.30 pm. I made it by the skin of my teeth. In a repeat of last night I went back to the computer at 5.15 pm till 6.00 pm and then TV until I called it a night at 8.00 pm. I’m following a couple of items on ebay at the moment so I checked up  on those before doing a few searches for things I like, walking sticks for one. After that I spent time concentrating on the mail again which included a further two notifications that Santander don’t love me any more. If I actually had an account with them no doubt I’d be heartbroken.

Wednesday. Such a major disappointment this morning to find in my mail box 5 separate messages directing me how to get back into my suspended Santander account. If they can’t get me with threats they’ll try to get me by being helpful. I also had 3 messages of love which was a surprise since as usual I’ve never met the ladies (?) in question. There was also a message with just one word…Hello. That went the way of the others. I suppose I shouldn’t complain too much as at least Mystic Myfanwy hasn’t been predicting my future fortunes again.

I had to get dressed and go out this morning though just as far as the corner shop. The sun was shining and it was really quite warm despite a breeze. We’re officially into Summer now so maybe this is it. Back home I decided to stay up and stay dressed in case my drugs were delivered ( they weren’t). I also decided to put a bid in on a game of Scrabble Trickster due to end this evening. The rules sound just about crazy enough to be a good laugh. While doing my post I came across a problem I’ve had before where my ISP suddenly decides not to send messages to any hotmail addresses. Everything I tried was getting returned as undeliverable and the steam was starting to seep out of my ears. In the end the only thing to do was create a new email address with gmail so now I have the same post going to both places and confusing me. Gmail breaks mail down into type, Social and Promotions and each is held as a separate list. The contacts list isn’t in an obvious place either. Somehow I managed to clear all the mail I save like payments to ebay until the goods arrive. Plonker.

I slept a good deal  of the afternoon though I did keep going to the computer when ever I was awake for more than 30 secs. At 4.30 pmm I went to enjoy my antiques programme and found I’d missed two messages on my mobile. Mike to tell me the move is going well but he won’t be here this weekend. Lee James to say he can’t make it tonight. A shame. At 5.45 pm though the door opened and Dil and Matt arrived. I made drinks as the Scrabble was set up. I don’t know why I bothered. It was a slaughter in the first game- Matt, and a massacre in the second game-Dil. I was demolished in the Nomination Whist-Dil again but I did win the cribbage so didn’t need a new pack of tissues. There’s a lot of humour expended on these games nights and I love them for that reason. We could be playing Snap  for all I care ( as long as I’m winning of course). They left as usual at 9.30 pm and after washing the pots and having a quick tidy round I came through to start the assault course of mail again. Now it’s time to go to bed and have a short read before witching hour is upon us.

Thursday. I won the Scrabble Trickster last night. Let’s see them beat me next week. If it comes early I’m memorising the rules.That should last all of half an hour. I’m still working out the differences in gmail but there are some definite pitfalls for me. I can’t find a way to  change the font style or size and two people I write to I layer the mail. They write a one line answer to my part of the message underneath mine, and I do the same to theirs. That seems to be a major faff. Currently I’m running between programmes dependant upon the message.

Since I put my prescription request in on Tuesday morning I the drugs back yesterday. It didn’t happen so when I went for bread this morning I stuck my head in the chemist. I let them know I needed a full spiriva kit and not just refills and that my gliclizide had run out. I was told they’d be here this afternoon. They weren’t and I’m not best pleased. This has happened before where they didn’t deliver because one item was missing. That’s not much good to me when I’ve run out of a drug. I shall have to pay another visit in the morning. There’s been a lot of mail today for some reason so a lot of time has been spent in here. With the heat I’ve been wanting to nod off more than once. I’ve been very good, and waited until a programme I wanted to watch came on TV. Then the rafters reverberated to my Zzzz’s. I did manage to see my new Big Bang Theory tonight though.

It’s been a funny day though. A message from Yvonne about Sunday. Ugo has to go away and needs to catch a coach so they’ll be with me from about 10.00 am Sunday till 1.00 pm. Not great but I can cope. I tried to tell her not to bother and save themselves the dash but NO, they were coming. Now a new message to say they’ll be here after all as his trip is put off by a week. If all those Nigerian con mails start again I’m going to get very suspicious. The window cleaner came and yes, I’d nodded of. I’ve decided never to clean the insides again so he can’t see me sleeping and think I do it all day .

Right, I’m off to bed. Sleep well all  !.

Friday. I’m really struggling with this gmail account. Not only do all my emails not arrive there, I don’t have the option of how to answer them ie. as layered answers, I write a line or two and then the recipient writes a line or two on top. Instead I have to write at the bottom of a long list of ongoing messages between us and scroll back up everytime I want to make sure I haven’t missed something. Within the last ten minutes I have at least discovered how to change the font, size and the colour. Yay.

After the usual morning jobs ( like waking up and dressing) I went to the chemist to find out what had happened to my drug delivery yesterday. At first I got some very blank looks like I hadn’t put the request in at all but eventually I was told they’d do what they could and bring my stuff round. Fair enough about an hour later Dawn arrived at the house with a bag. I asked her to hang on for a minute while I checked it in case I’d been given just the refill capsules for the spiriva. I hadn’t. In fact the spiriva wasn’t there in any form so I had to query that with Dawn. It wasn’t even sowing on the bag as an item owed. She said she’s go back and check for me and I’m sure she doubted I’d ordered it.  At least I had the now three drugs I’d run out of and I hadn’t run out of the spiriva. Just as well really as she didn’t return with it for me. And before you ask, I know I ordered it as I wrote on the request that I needed the full kit. The senility hasn’t hit quite that bad yet.

Yesterday I trawled through all Julia’s crafting stuff to find a machine I’d promised Yvonne. It took a while to find all the different plates that fit it it but eventually I managed it and prepared two big bags for her on Sunday. Picture if you will a wall. From right to left are a five drawer chest of drawers, a slight gap, another 5 drawer chest then a set of three plastic drawers full of craft material. Righto, got that? I need to get rid of the 3 drawer craft set so that I can move the left hand chest to the left  ( change partners do se do) so that there is now a larger gap in the middle. I want to fill that gap with a set of bookshelves which ebay kindly furnished me with this morning. 4 shelves high that fold down and the sides fold in over them. Amazing value at £23.99 and I had the option of free home delivery or delivery to an Argos shop for collection. I took the home delivery option and they should be here by Tuesday. With any luck that”s the day the game will arrive too.

There have been a lot of messages today. Only one from Santander to say my sign in is now blocked but one from Barclays again to say they’re having problems paying money into my account. I suggest they gather cash and send me that instead. I don’t mind if they close a non-existent account really. Regretfully there have been no declarations of love or offers of marriage today so during a gap between Antique Road Trips I took a shower. I removed the shampoos and bodywashes from the seat and used that to sit on this time. I still had to bend over to keep my arms from being above my head since there’s no Mike to scream for. It’s been along day and I expect a fairly long weekend but he does have a life of his own out there as well. I hope the weather stays nice and you all have a Great Weekend.

Cheese String Thing with cheese string

 

The laundryboy

Mucky Face

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Saturday. Dawn came sneaking round a corner this morning and crept up behind me with a hammer. Dame Aurora can be a devil like that, one minute a headache, next minute the sun is glaring down saying get your lazy arse out of bed. I complied yet it was no later than 5.00 am. I wasn’t actually in bed anyway which is how the sun caught me. I’d been sleeping in my chair after sleep and I had an altercation in the bedroom. Sleep wanted to plague my rest with dreams and I’m like the BBC- no adverts. I returned to the bedroom where at least the sun wouldn’t bother me. It would take more than that to get through my curtains.

I turned on the computer, opened both my email programmes since the new one doesn’t seem to bring all my mail over and because some I prefer to answer in the format I use on TalkTalk. I was heartbroken to see that Barclay’s have also decided to suspend my sigh in but even worse, the Halifax are now saying they have problems with my account. This is getting so bad that yesterday I deleted a message from Paypal about a refund to my account before I realised  it might be genuine. Once I checked with Paypal it was. Another beggar has reused to honour the ebay agreement to supply goods after an auction and after I’ve paid. This lot haven’t even had the manners to respond to messages. Ebay raised a case, gave them 5 days to respond and then refunded me. I’d much rather have had the goods though as it was a lovely mirror clock with the Welsh Dragon at the centre. Last week I had a similar problem with a case for my phone. I’m waiting patiently like an idiot until I realise nothing is coming. The firm did initiate a refund very quickly but no apology or explanation of why they didn’t send it. I had to start again with another firm which firstly sent the wrong one and quickly corrected it. Once before I bought something, paid for it and waited. The seller marked it as dispatched. Three weeks later she admitted it hadn’t been sent an d she wasn’t going to as she didn’t like the price she got. Put a bloody reserve on it in that case!

I had breakfast and then put all the bins and rubbish bags out. At 7.30 am I went out for the bus. At the supermarket just up the hill ( one of two…Supermarkets, not hills) I got cash from the machine. I could almost hear it say “The Bank Manager- He say YES” and I considered shouting “I’ve won” but it was still quite early. I grabbed a  shopping trolley, loaded my sticks aboard and set off. The vases at home weren’t looking too bad but they were perhaps a little crowded and all four contained the same plants. I was bound to be able to weed some dead stuff out so I bought a nice bouquet of mixed flowers and a bunch of carnations. Then I edged up the vegetable  aisle, and note this….I stopped. I bought lettuce, tomato, cucumber and some Jersey potatoes. All bets are off if it rains though !! Baps next, cakes ( for my neighbour who is always taking in parcels for me or returning my bin from wherever the binmen leave it),a rhubarb pie, butter, milk, ( I considered cream but decided not), yoghurts, round the corner for bacon and lemon meringue pie. Then I needed biscuits, crisps, sweets and a bottle of beer. Somehow I managed to forget coleslaw and pickled beetroot.  The girl on the till waited until I had my bags set out in the trolley before ringing the goods through which was a great help. Then I got cigarettes from my friend who called me a taxi…No, she didn’t say “You’re a Taxi”, she made a phone call to get me one. He arrived a couple of minutes later and I was home for 8.30 am.

It didn’t take too long to unpack and put away the shopping but it took forever to get rid of some of the old flowers, trim the others and arrange the new ones so it didn’t look like I’d just bunged the bunches in a vase. I had to get very arty-farty. Mike usually does it so he must be more in touch with his feminine side than me. I knew I’d need the coleslaw for lunchtime so I went to Pauline’s, forgot the beetroot and bought more cigarettes instead. I think my mind might be elsewhere.  Perhaps a little worried about tomorrow? Back at home I laid into the mail again and by lunchtime was back up to date. I ate lunch watching an old film but don’t ask me what as I’ve no idea now. After lunch I just zonked out anyway.

When I woke I knew for sure I’d been out an hour and the mail would be there again, I had another catch up session. As long as I was free for 5.00 pm s there was a Miss Marple I haven’t seen. After that a Jack Black film was due to start. I managed less than ten minutes before I had to turn it off or bang my head against a few walls. So, I came through and I’ve been keeping pace with mail ever since.

I wish you all a wonderful week.

A killer smile

First Nursery photo

 

Funny Monster

Sticky fingers

The Missing Doughnut and Bye Bye Birdie.

Long, long ago in the Dark Ages three hopeful spirits set out on a Pilgrimage. They were not seeking the elusive Holy Grail, but a much more mundane prize, The Perfect Summer’s Day.

Two adults ( though in on case that’s a matter of opinion) and one child travelled from their lonely village home of Llysfaen ( Cliss fine or if your tongue has straightened out from last time, Thliss fine) (Please send a crossed cheque made payable to me for these lessons I’m providing) to the shores of the great sea that floated in front of the Promenade at Llandudno. The sun beat down mercilessly, or to put it another way, the temperature actually achieved double figures. The child (Yvonne) like all the other children of this magical place grew hungry and thirsty. The adults who protected her ( let us call them David and Julia) saw that there was a place of abundance close by and went hunting.

David returned with a feast which was called Doughnut while Julia returned with drink from the sacred spring of St. Pepsi.  Yvonne started to sate her thirst and lifted the Doughnut to her mouth. At this moment the sky darkened. Time seemed to freeze momentarily and they knew a monster approached.!! Seconds later, even before they had time to hide beneath a bench the monster struck and Yvonne’s hand was empty. The Doughnut was gone !! Yvonne’s face crumpled as had her hand moments before. David ran to the place of hunting and quickly acquired a replacement. He placed it gently in Yvonne’s hand and her face lit up again bringing the sun back out. The hand grew round the Doughnut to encompass it and keep it from sight and tentatively she moved it towards her mouth. Success, she managed a bite. As her smile grew all three heard a beating sound like that of the little drummer boy rat, tat, tatting on his instrument. ( get your minds out of the gutter please).

All at one there appeared at Yvonne’s feet dozens of pigeons. She cooed with pleasure, they cooed back. Before the adults could warn her she started to sprinkle crumbs from the Doughnut in their path. The crumbs disappeared as if by magic, but the pigeons didn’t. They decided her knees would make good perches and moments later the adults had lost sight of their precious daughter as in her place sat a pigeon tree. David, being a wimp, was about to panic when Julia took action. “SHOO” she cried and with a huge whoosh the birds took flight. Yvonne was in some disarray since the pigeons obviously thought her hair was straw ( since they don’t eat gold and have no idea what blonde is). But in her hand she was clutching with determination half the Doughnut. She took a tentative bite when the sky darkened for a second time and down came the monster. This time it didn’t attack but landed close to Yvonne and started to stalk her. All the time it’s beady eye on her hand, all the time her eye on it’s huge maw. It was a test. The adults dare not interfere as these two forces of nature prepared to do battle. All of a sudden, Yvonne brought her hand up to her mouth and took a bite but before the monster could attack she threw the remaining piece down and said ” Awww, poor seagull, here you are.”

They say no kindness goes unpunished but that day the two adults were surprised to see it could happen. Yvonne was safe. She drank her libation from the sacred spring of St. Pepsi, gave a polite burp, and they moved on to other delights. A Punch and Judy show on the pier, a very short and uncomfortable donkey ride and even a bit of shopping though no Kinky Boots were bought. They lunched in another scared Sacred grove which came to be called The Cocoa House where they found fish with delightfully deep fried objects called chips. The adults partook of Sacred drugs called caffeines. And they grew tired.

As the day wore on David noticed Yvonne beginning to flag. ” Let’s go home” he suggested.  They headed towards their chariot which had been parked on the street of shops close to a feeding station. Julia took to the reins. They had noticed some of the seagulls ‘mooching’ about on the pavement near the chariot as people threw crumbs to them. Some landed in the road and as Julia pulled the chariot away from the kerb one of the braver seagulls made a dive for a large crumb. There was a crunch like breaking a stick of seaside rock and the two adults looked at each other and then at Yvonne. David got out to check and sure enough there was one monster less in the skies. Getting back into the chariot he said ” Whew, that’s lucky. the wheels went either side of it and missed.” Yvonne smiled again and said ” I wonder if that’s the one I fed?”

 

Fate, Kismet or just plain old luck.

“I have a writer friend in the US who has INSISTED, under penalty of coming to visit me if I don’t, that I include here a mention of a free promotion I have going on one of my books.  She’s further insisted that I give the link to said book and promised to check back to make sure I’ve done it, threatening to post a promo and link in the comments if I don’t.  Seeing as how she’s vicious and not to be trifled with … here is the link to my promo, which is running this weekend only …

U.S. http://www.amazon.com/Barsetshire-Diary-The-Diaries-ebook/dp/B0054JI824/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1368312680&sr=1-1&keywords=my+barsetshire+diary

U.K. http://www.amazon.co.uk/Barsetshire-Diary-The-Diaries-ebook/dp/B0054JI824/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1368312789&sr=8-1&keywords=My+Barsetshire+Diary

On with the tale…….Many of you will know that I used to work in Local Government. When I returned to Wales I took up a post which necessitated me roaming the County and checking the street lamps. I had to plot them on a map, verify the type of lamp they were and ensure it was only the ones run by my Local Authority which were plotted and not those run by the Highways Authority which were totally different altogether. Bored yet?

On one of my rural trips I was plotting a series of lamps when I got into conversation with a couple living in a large converted Church. I fussed their dogs, was invited to have a cuppa ( which I had to decline) and was invited back at some stage. Some few years later I decorated the flat in which my father’s mother lived only to have her die a few months later- not as a result of my decorating I hasten to add. Life moved on and I began a new period of work within the Authority which involved me working beside a river ensuring the bank was safe and the grass was cut short. One young man I worked with had a similar taste in music and as we were all quite friendly I allowed him to borrow some LP’s ( youngsters will need their parents to explain what LP’s are). Soon afterwards the Authority decided I was needed elsewhere and was asked to take on the job of  Deputy Manager of a new scheme they wanted to try. This was going to involve a lot of interviewing. I didn’t get my records back.

The first day of interviews went well. We’d decided where possible to take people who were not currently working and give them  chance ( the idea of a very forward thinking individual). They were mainly women but a few men a well. We took on 8 people that first day. The next morning I was prepared for another fresh start and the sun was out. It was early May and man had left the cave, invented the wheel and was now living in houses. It wasn’t a good start. The first three people weren’t employed but had no interest in becoming employed either.  Some kind body brought a cup of tea through just before person number four came in. My heart sank. Jeans, leather jacket and motor cycle helmet. The helmet came off to reveal a woman with quite long, straight brown hair who like the others didn’t look interested. And to be honest, because of the way she dressed for interview, I wasn’t interested either. But, custom said to plough on. It transpired here was someone suffering hardship and ho was actually a nice lady. She got a job, as did seven more that day.

I’m normally quite a quiet and reserved person but I don’t believe in separating myself from my staff as I need to know of any problems. We had two teams of 8 people some of whom were willing to work late shifts if necessary. I became quite friendly with the teams as I’d go out with them sometimes, especially if it was an evening shift. The lady from day two was around a lot of course and I confess I liked her a lot but had no idea how to approach her. I got into conversation with another girl who seemed quite friendly with her and found out that she didn’t have a boyfriend or husband ( in fact she’d sworn off men) and managed to find out quite a bit about her. The following day the girl came in and asked for a word with me. Taking her to one side she told me HER SISTER would be happy to go for a drink with me. I had no idea they were sisters because of the difference in names. So, plucking up my courage I asked her out and Julia said yes.

We’d been going out for 3 months and I was pretty sure how I felt about Julia. Still showing my usual cowardice I chose a night when we were sitting alone in her lounge to ask where she saw our relationship going. She prevaricated a bit and I asked what she wanted to happen to which I got the response I’d hoped and I asked her to marry me. She said YES. Since we were alone we decided to have a romantic evening and play some music. I started looking through her records and found something I liked. And something else, and something else, and one marked on the cover where mine had been. Asking her about them she said a previous boyfriend had left them. Every one I’d loaned him was there. Julia said I only proposed to get my hands on them again.

I didn’t want to wait and so we booked the ceremony for November 1st of that year. One of the first things to do, despite being adults, was for me to ask her father for her hand ( I told Julia he was desperate for me to take the rest of her too) so the following Saturday morning we set off to where they lived. I’d never been there before. You could have knocked me down with a feather when we arrived and I immediately recognised the decorating.

Next job was to visit her big sister to give her the news. This would be hard I was told as she was very sceptical with the speed of things. Her parents drove us there and when we came within sight I almost cried out “It can’t be” but it was. They occupied the converted church. At least I got the long promised cuppa. Julia and I had many a laugh about that period over the years. I know coincidences happen but was that what had happened or had fate taken a hand in things to bring us together like bookends? You’ll have to decide.

Rhyme and Reason?

In my post on April  11th I mentioned how difficult I’ve been finding it to locate certain things.  I was starting to wonder if Ju was sending me a message. For instance, when we cleared the garage , Yvonne, Ugo and I created piles for me, the Hospice Charity shops and for Muriel/John ( hereinafter called MuJo). When MuJo came I took them round to the garage, we’d found literally boxes of Ju’s horse figurines and I wanted her to have her choice. I’d put some watercolour paintings to one side for John as I know he likes them, but could they be found? Not a cat in hell’s chance. Either they’d evaporated or some wild rats have discerning taste in nest decor.

Whenever Christmas rolled around Ju would clear the decks to make way for the decorations. My collections on display would disappear and I’d be told they’d be back when the decorations were packed away. That never seemed to happen just as last years tree never seemed to re-appear. The loft ( please God I don’t have to clear that out ) must be full of Christmas trees and collections of old inkwells etc. But, the thing that had most puzzled me was Julia’s laptop bag. It and it’s contents had faded into thin air. I’d torn clumps of hair from my rapidly receding widow’s peak trying to find them. I tried to follow Ju’s logic as to where it would be since it wasn’t actually with the laptop which naturally enough was tucked down beside the settee. OK, I had to admit defeat as women’s logic was always beyond me.  But in wanting to give things to the family to remember Ju I have a niece who crafts and that bag contained lots of crafting DVD’s.

On Thursday when Yvonne was with me I’d gone to the pantry and a flash of yellow had caught my eye. I visit the pantry multiple times daily for the accoutrements to cooking or to deposit rubbish in the bin and before Thursday- Nada, but there it was, the flash of yellow. Reaching through the accumulated brushes, ancient hoovers, pan stands and a lightbulb collection that would do a lighthouse justice, I grasped the object in question and out came the upside down laptop bag complete with the DVD’s I wanted. Checking through there was no sign of the also missing tablet bought some months ago. Back to the pantry I went and soon had it in hand. I’m not sure if it still works, or how it works and will have to rely on my nephew’s expertise. He’ll tell me if it’s a toy I need or whether someone else can use it better. The DVD’s will now be able to go to a good home too. But PLEASE someone, explain to me the logic behind having a laptop bag, upside down in a pantry of all places and why it chose to reveal itself at that moment. At some stage I may have to explain to someone why I didn’t decide to look in there purposely as they wearily tap their feet and say, “Huh, s’obvious innit?”.

Our Goodbye

Yesterday, Friday 12 th  was the day of the funeral and our last goodbye to Julia. Many people may not understand-or agree- with our decision to honour her request for a religion free service. It was beautiful. Julia had a wonderful sense of humour and so my arrangements with the undertaker may have raised a few eyebrows but with the agreement of all the major players, Yvonne, Karen and Joanne we went ahead. I prepared the order of service which would be given out yesterday.

The hearse and the family car collected us at about 11.20 . The flowers reading ‘MUM’ from Yvonne and a large horseshoe from me were place aboard the coffin along with other family flowers. We were all wearing some token black but under my frockcoat I wore a silver waistcoat (vest) and a silver, flower patterned tie. Yvonne, my nieces and I got in the family car and the undertaker started walking in front of the hearse to guide it into traffic on the main road. We set off at a sedate pace and maintained it the whole journey. For anyone who’s journey was delayed because of us I apologise

We arrived at the crematorium at 11.40 and had a few minutes to wait while the previous mourners departed. At a beckoning motion from the funeral director someone opened the car doors and we were ready to go in. Julia had expected perhaps a dozen mourners or celebrants but I could see at least sixty people there. We entered to the strains of Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah by Alan Sherman and I’m sure Ju was laughing. The Reverend spoke for a few minutes to say we were there to celebrate the life of Julia  before inviting Yvonne and my niece Karen up to speak. Yvonne spoke movingly about her beloved mother and described her as both mother and friends. Some things were so difficult she had to pause to regain control and the congregation had tears in their eyes. I know I cried as did Julia’s sister Muriel behind me who was so close to Julia in many ways. Karen read Julia’s poem which it turns out she helped to write. She also choked and her audience followed suit.

The Reverend introduced the song Hey Ho by the Lumineers which had become a firm favourite by Julia recently after hearing it on an advert. The words ‘I belong to you, you belong to me, Be mine Sweetheart’ brought on the eyeball sweats again. The tissue manufacturers saw their share prices rise accordingly. As the song ended I was called along with Ugo to speak. Many of you won’t know that I stutter badly when faced with strangers and so I kept my head down as I laid a single lily in remembrance on the coffin and for the whole time I spoke about Julia and her kindness, her being my rock and making me wheeze by introducing rats, degus and anything else to the house .( I confess, I love them all). I had to stop three or four times to regain my composure and kick myself for not buying shares in tissues before I left. I finished with a poem by E.E.Cummings called I hold you in my heart. Ugo followed me and made sure everyone knew what a privilege it was to know Julia and be welcomed into the family by so caring a person who never judged. Even my stoic son in law needed my comfort up there when he choked and the audience choked with him. There was such sadness and yet such Joy at having known her.

The Reverend started the committal with some nice words and to the music of Fun with We are Young, Julia’s casket was borne away and the curtains closed. The Reverend gave a nice speech about Julia, including how wrong the comedian Les Dawson had been about Mothers -in-law and how Julia had been many different things to many different people, Julia Prosser the mother, Julia Prosser the wife the aunt, the friend. Julia Prosser, Lady of Bouldnor, the fundraiser for good causes, Julia Prosser the mother in law and the lover of animals. Yet while being all these people she was ONE PERSON in one body all the time. Thinking about it that must be true of all of us that different people see us in different ways in different roles. I hope we’re nice in all of them.

We then stood for the closing as we were told to stay strong for Ju and she was wished a safe journey to follow her belief of meeting up with her parents again until it’s time for us to be together again. I have no doubt she’s with them and enjoying a lot of pain free rides on all the horses in the sunlight. We walked out of the crematorium to the strains of Talk Talk and their record Life’s What You Make It.

Back out in the daylight we met all those who had come to pay their respects. Ugo’s family who’d travelled from London and Birmingham ( not Alabama), My sister-in-law’s daughter ( yes, a long winded way of saying my niece) Hayley, who had also driven from London that morning, friends from the cafes I wrote of in the books that she so loved visiting, friends of Yvonne’s who had met her and loved her and her friends from the two stables she used. Llanfynydd RDA with their wonderful staff, especially Di who helped her so much and Carl and Storm from Pennant Park which now has it’s indoor arena ( we still need a hoist though- subtle hint).    I took the canvas of Julia that had been on the coffin and we repaired to the pub where glasses and cups were raised to her picture on the mantlepiece as she watched us enjoy her day. She will never be forgotten.

The Last Poem

During this time you can imagine the number of bright spots have been few. Perhaps things will improve after the funeral tomorrow. One thing that did happen though is that Julia had left a poem with my niece which was to be given to Yvonne and myself when she was no longer with us. I’d like to share that with you if I may.

I’d also like to share a photograph taken which shows Ju’s hand holding Yvonne’s which I find very moving. I placed the poem on the picture to produce something to accompany the Order of Service tomorrow.

It’s strange that I can’t find anything since Ju passed away almost like she’s hiding things. Her laptop bag complete with Joanna Sheen craft DVD’s and her tablet. Most strange.

The End of Days

Today saw the end of the war. Julia fought many battles and has won many of them. In the end, superior forces sneaked in and defeated her. She left our presence but never our hearts at 4.10 am today, Saturday 30th March 2013.

Like me and our daughter, Julia was often overwhelmed by the support of so many people she didn’t know but often wanted to. She had great faith in people and declared herself a humanist whenever anyone asked. I always shared the best wishes of everyone who responded to a blog and sometimes we were able to share a laugh and a joke over them. One thing is sure and it’s that Julia was always grateful for the time people took to respond to something  written about her, even if I’d managed to be rude. She never considered herself important enough to be the subject of a blog, but I guess I owed her that much after the portrayal of her in my  books. I did wear the trousers in the house and had her permission to say so. In fact she certainly was important, not just to family and friends but to all those whose causes she undertook and by all those she raised money for, though I  never got as much as I deserved I thought.

When Julia passed away , the hospice ( the FANTASTIC St.Kentigern’s) had allowed Yvonne, Ugo and my nieces Karen and Joanne as well as myself,to remain by her side, sleeping in the lounge for hours at a time and supplying us with drinks. I want to thank the family for their strength and support and love as well as thanks to the staff from all of us for their patience and kindness. Their care of Julia was unbeatable. When we are able to hold a funeral In would ask for donations either to Cancer Research or to St. Kentigern’s to allow them to carry on doing such a brilliant job.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

R.I.P Julia Prosser 15.07.1956 – 30.03.2013

This Is The Week That Is

I suppose the title is not stricly true if you happen to be a pedant since given that Sunday is /monday is the start of a new week I’m actually covering parts of two weeks. I wasn’t sure that ‘TWTWTW with TITWTI’ wouldn’t sound like some demented owl calling instead of a title.

I left the story on Friday of last week with the hope that Julia would regain the will to go out or at least to give the ‘girls’ an outing from their cage. ( For new readers, I make the mistake of referring to my daughter and two nieces as the girls as well as our selection of pet rats. I leave it to you to decide who’s been caged).

The driver in place the pain must have been reduced but overall was still evident. So, on Saturday the dosage in the driver was increased, which required a doctor’s authorisation via the nurses. When  it had to be increased again, and because of the snow passage to our home was even more difficult, the MacMillan nurse decided to try for a place at the hospice immediately. That wasn’t possible so a bed at the hospital where Ju”s treatment started was found. Neither my daughter nor I was keen on the idea because they’re large wards, patients have to go through the outpatients dept. before being sent to a ward and there’s no guarantee of visiting outside the stated times. But, any port in a storm as the saying goes. It was thus arranged by having an on call doctor come and assess Julia and sign an authorisation for hospitalisation. It was actually strange to see the doctor since both Julia and I had met him before. He has a surgery in a local town, obviously covers as an on call doctor and also has a job with ATOS, the firm employed by the government to assess people for Disability Living Allowance claims- and refuse them . We remembered him well from his assessment of my claim a couple of years back. He had me walk four feet from chair to door before deciding I could walk OK. He saved himself the bother of asking me a few questions by just supplying his own answers for them and talking to Julia said ” Please My Lady, let him answer the quession I ask” despite being told I wasn’t able to. But this was all done in the most charming manner. On arrival this time to assess Julia he acted as though we’d not met each other before and referred to me as ‘Young Man’ (eyesight not bad then) and said to Julia ” Oh my Lady, you’re far too young for this, far too young” ( and who could disagree with that).

A couple of hours later the ambulance battled it’s way through to collect Ju. An ecstatic Macmillan Nurse rang to say we could have a place in the hospice on Monday but they don’t do weekend admissions. The alternatives were a different hospice much further away or a bed at the local cottage hospital until a transfer could be arranged on Monday.  Yvonne and I gave the problem our undivided attention for all of two seconds and decided on the local hospital. We told the ambulance men who were a little bemused as that wasn’t on their  destination sheet, but it meant an earlier finish so they could cope.

Julia was transported by wheelchair to the ambulance which was a very painful journey but inescapable because of the state of the ground cover of snow and ice. I travelled with her while Yvonne followed in the car with Ugo. It was a very short journey and soon we were on the ward. Though this a main ward it consisted of only four beds. And though privacy was somewhat impacted everyone had automatically started speaking in whispers the minute we entered. Amazingly though, the staff placed no restriction on visiting times and even showed us to a family room where there was a bed enabling some to stay over. It was also a place where we could bring food to so that there was no need to leave the hospital to eat. Ju’s morphine doses were increased again so we expeccted all to be well.

There was no doctor at the hospital so when Julia felt pain the nursing staff had to phone one to get permission to increase the morphine 20mg at a time. This wasn’t achieving much. So, after a Sunday where we brought and ate enough food to feed the four thousand and left the family room smelling like we’d had a Turkish sauna in there instead of Just Yvonne and Ugo sleeping it was great when Monday and the time fo transfer came. I travelled in the ambulance with Julia again while Yvonne and Ugo went by car and Karen did the same.

The hospice (St. Kentigern’s) is fantastic. Though Ju is in a much smaller room than last time which doesn’t have it’s own bathroom, the kindness here is amazing. No restriction on visitors ( I mean number of rather than they can form their own Sumo wrestling team to perform there) and they’ve allowed Yvonne and I to stay over so Ju has our attention 24/7 ( who shouted ‘Poor Soul’ then?) as well as constant care from the staff here which includes a fantastic Doctor who is the most empathetic I’ve ever met and brilliant staff for whom nothing is too much trouble. There’s also the possibilty to order meals so you don’t have to leave if you’d prefer . All that being said, the dosage of morphine is now strong enough to kill the pain and discomfort but Ju is hardly lucid at all now. It’s Thursday at 7.15 am here and Yvonne or I have spent the night sitting with Ju  and giving her occasional drinks to keep her hydrated. The tumour has now caused a blockage so she’s unable to eat at all. Any attempt leads to sickness so the liquid is important.

We spend time playing Ju’s favourite music, holding hands (hers) and stuffing biscuits and cakes down our gullets while Ju sleeps. We know this is the end, just not when it will arrive. Each of us hopes to be here when it does so we can say goodbye properly and not allow her to pass feeling alone. There have been important visitors here that have made Ju’s life better by their presence. Lis, one of those people who enrich the lives of all about them came as soon as the snow conditions allowed. Despite her lack of awareness Ju smiled from ear to ear. Little Mike came yesterday when he had a chance and I’m sure his cheeky banter lit sparks of recognition for her. Both Karen and Joanne (The Nieces) we here last night though Karen has been here all day every day suffering my jokes. Our nephew Lee and his partner Jen visited on Tuesday evening and Ju recognised them I’m sure. Today we know Karen will arrive early and be carrying bacon sandwiches for Yvonne and I and the three of us will sit and reminisce throughout the day trying to include Ju in the conversation where possible. We have no idea how long we’ll be sitting here for.

Quietness.

I’ve found myself being rather quiet recently. Conversation isn’t coming easily as I don’t much feel like being flippant. But in life, things have a way of catching you out don’t they? After the shock of last week I’d placed an advert on a degu site asking for a home for the three degu girls. I realised that it would be impossible for Julia to cope when I brought her home. As I’m quite allergic to them ( and the rats) there’s not much I could do either when it came to cleaning. But lets face it, I’m a man and never realise when things need cleaning anyway. I’d also added to the advert that I had the rats too and if anyone was interested………. All I’d specified was that I wanted someone fairly local so that we could keep an eye if needed and they didn’t have far to travel.

Unexpectedly I got an immediate answer and had messaged the young man who replied. Julia had been home a few hours when I mentioned the degus would have to go, I was pleased when she agreed (reluctantly) which was just as well because he arrived. Within half an hour the degus had gone and  I was sure it was to a good home. While he was here he saw the girls and said ” About your mention of the rats in the advert. I’d like them too.” I saw Ju’s face change and begin to crumple. As I went through to my room to get something she followed and tearfully asked that the girls not go just yet. What could I do? But, as luck would have it, he’d come in a car and the girl’s cage is quite a good size and would not slide into the car upright. I couldn’t let him take the cage on it’s back as the girls would be standing on wire rather than their solid base. After explaining that Ju was reluctant to say goodbye to them just yet I pointed out that they’d be safe and still here for him later. He left with that promise.

Since then, Ju has risen every morning without fuss to play with them before they go to bed. As she’s usually the one to open the cage while I make her a cuppa, the routine goes like this.

Priya will run straight for Ju’s dressing gown sleeve.

Bernie will go straight for the opening at the neck and wander down to her waist. Sometimes Ju sits down on the settee then until they emerge again. Then it’s up to the cage.

Penny will climb out onto the top of the cage and then onto Ju’s shoulder while Amy will tuck herself into one of the tubes they sleep in and wait to be lifted out. I will deliver Ju’s cuppa and then go back to take my meds. That done I have to pour myself a bowl of cereal because of the diabetes ( at least that’s the excuse) and go sit on the settee. Bernie will have been sitting on the arm in anticipation of my arrival. I have to give them each a shreddie on my spoon and they run off to hide and eat them. I daren’t take a mouthful yet as it’s not long before they return. Bernie first for her second one which suffices followed by Amy, Priya and Penny in quick succession and only after they’ve taken their third one can I carry on.

Ju uses this interval to take her tablets and a drop of her tea. My part in the performance is usually over in five minutes and it’s play time for a while with them raiding pockets for tissues to play tug of war with or running in and out of dressing gowns. There’s a blanket over the back of the settee and they love crawling under it. Eventually I’m off duty and Ju takes over again as the drinks lady.

Here’s Priya with a cup of tea.

For the not too squeamish, here’s Penny getting her breakfast the cheeky way.

Me fighting for food with Penny.

  There are some very distinctive styles of drinking. Penny will always cup the liquid in her hand and bring it to her mouth like a gentile lady. Bernie’s quite happy just to stick her nose straight in. Priya on the other hand tries both as if she’s unsure what she should do. Amy is always on guard so she’ll pass it from hand to mouth too. Then usually she’s straight up on her back legs to check for danger in the air. maybe she expects the Red Baron to appear.

Half an hour is about as much as Ju can take of playtime now but I’m so pleased she still shows the same interest. The biggest surprise for me is her determination to maintain the riding. So, on Wednesday afternoon we’re off to see if she can actually cope. We can only attend the RDA stables as they’ve got a mechanical hoist to get riders to horse level. Great news on the charity front though as our friends at a local cafe have a giant teddy bear they’re going to raffle off for Pennant Park Wishes and we’ve just heard that planning permission has been granted and building is about to start. All those that have donated to the Riding for the Disabled Charity at Pennant Park have my     undying thanks. I’ll let you all know how Wednesday goes.

Christmas Doings.

Christmas Eve dawned early with a six o’clock awakening of my wife. One bleary eye opened when I announced her cup of tea. ” What time is it ?” she asked. “Getting on for eight” I replied fearing the Wrath of Khan before the tea was drunk. Knowing that for some reason she generally sleeps without a watch helps. The reason for my duplicity was twofold. Firstly, I wanted to get to the shops before they became too crowded and secondly, I wanted to go without the girls having been given playtime or we’d be lucky to get out before ten.

Anyway, by 6.30 we’d made real progress in that the tea was drunk and not thrown at me and Ju was looking much more bright eyed than I’d hoped since she’d been in some pain on the Sunday. By 6.45 we were in the car and on our way. The road was quite busy with people rushing to work or rushing home from the party the night before. It was quite foggy and atmospheric with the lights of approaching cars coming towards us. In the supermarket there were quite a few early shoppers but not enough to worry me. Yes, it’s me that has a thing about crowds….more on that later.

I left Ju to pick up some cigarettes for me and go for a coffee while I shopped. Normally I wouldn’t do so alone in case someone spoke to me but today everyone was conscious of their own needs and getting what they needed before someone emptied the shelves. Not wanting much other than fresh bread, milk , ham and some coleslaw I was ready to head for the tills when I spotted some trifles. I bought one then decided to look at the Christmas puddings and fresh cream. By the time I’d got the extra things and gone to the tills it was eight o’clock. Smiling at the cashier to avoid speaking I paid up, packed the shopping and wheeled the trolley to the MacDonalds where Ju was sitting with coffee. As she saw me approach she tipped her hand asking if I wanted one and I nodded. Reaching the table I asked her to order a bacon roll for me too, I passed her some money then dipped into her bag for my ‘before food’ tablet and sat down to take it. “Brown or red sauce ” she called from the counter. “Brown please” I replied wondering why I bothered since it’s so thinly spread it’s questionable whether it’s really there sometimes..

Ju brought me a latte over and a fresh one for herself since I must have been feeling so generous. The bacon roll arrived, was eaten and for dessert I took my two ‘after food’ torpedoes. Ju asked me the time. “It’s almost 8.15 sweetie” I risked with a smile. “Hmm, we’ve made good time this morning then” I heard and wondered which of the Pantheon of Gods I owed that favour to. We were soon on our way again heading for the trading estate which has a handy pet shop where we could get some treats for the girls. One of my favourite shops is there so I was allowed to look round in case anything new and interesting was in. There wasn’t so we hit the coffee bar where the staff treated us to a latte each before we head for home.

At ten o’clock we were home and had the shopping inside. Unfortunately you reach the kitchen of our home through the lounge and as we entered we were greeted by four wide awake and very hopeful faces from one cage and the sound of frantic activity from the other. I knew what was coming so as Ju removed her coat I put the shopping away. She’d no sooner opened the rats cage than Priya ran down her arm and plunged inside the neckline of her cardigan. Bernie wasn’t far behind preferring to sit on her shoulder and nestle into her neck. Penny and Amy climbed inside one of the tubes in the cage and patiently waited to be lifted out.  Ju put two large picture frames against the degu cage to stop the rats climbing up it and upsetting the degus . They’re not enemies but they certainly don’t get on. If Bernie climbs on to their cage to see them in her friendly way they set up an almighty chittering sound. Anyway, Ju played with the girls on the settee for half an hour as usual and then put them back in their cage where they happily settled down to sleep. Removing the picture frames she then got the degus out one by one and put them into balls. First Poppy then Honey with Mummy degu Saffy last to go. With three balls hurtling round the rooms aiming for your ankles it’s easier if you’re not on your feet. I swear if they catch you a Dick Dastardly snicker comes from them. I beat a hasty retreat to catch up on emails I hadn’t finished earlier. The eventual call of “Sweeties” has the balls tolling back to the lounge so they’re given a sweet before going back in their cage.

The rest of the day was a light lunch, television. emails and an assortment of phone calls before Ju went to bed at 6.30. I was luckier than usual and she went to sleey just the right side of midnight so I was able to turn my computer off and rest myself.

Christmas day I was up at 4am. I answered messages and sent messages of greeting out to friends around the world. At 6am I took Ju’s stocking ( a carrier bag really) and placed it one her bed before going to make a drink. Turning the lounge light on I gave all the animals a sweet and went through to the kitchen. While the kettle boiled I turned the tank light on and fed the fish. I took my meds then made the tea and took them through to Ju to gently wake her. Unusually it didn’t take much. She moved over for me to get in and passed my stocking ( a large sack) to me to open. We always do this together and in the past when Yvonne lived at home or stayed with us she joined us in bed to open her stocking too. There are always fantastic treats and always something funny. One year Ju go me some washing up gloves with a fur trim. This year I’d got her a rubber horse head mask and used bags of her favourite sweets to fill it out. It looked like a scene from the Godfather.

Tradition says we would normally go and have breakfast next before being allowed to open main presents but since Ju can’t face breakfast these days it’s just me. Up went the barriers and out came the girls. When they heard me put cereal (Shreddies) in  a bowl they all rushed to my end of the settee to wait. I sit down gingerly to try and avoid sitting on anyone before the fun starts. Four heads in unison try to get to my bowl first and I have to rush to get a shreddie on the spoon before one of them snatches it off. I usually manage a mouthful in between each of their courses which is usually three each though Bernie only eats one and squirrels the others away behind a cushion for later. Priya usually finds them within minutes.

After both sets have played and been returned to their cages it’s our time. We opened our gifts from Santa , or each other if you like. This took quite a while and was accompanied by lots of Oohs and Aahs. After that it’s time to open gifts from friends and family we won’t see on Christmas day.After each one we phoned or texted our delight. Finally finished Ju collects the wrapping to go for recycling while I make another cuppa and it’s time to get dressed. I show Ju a tee-shirt I printed up with a picture of us both on with wording that says Happiness is Love shaped. I have on new warm socks, new underwear, tee-shirt, new black jeans, black cardigan and black winklepicker cowboy boots with a cuban heel. Suddenly I’m as tall as I used to be. Ju spends some time picking through her finery before settling on a nice outfit and we’re ready to go. Yvonne’s first Christmas as a wife and her first cooking Christmas dinner for us all.

We have a great time at their home swapping and opening presents before settling down to dinner.She’s cooked a small beef joint for me and done my favourite onion sauce with it. For Ju she’s cooked a small lamb joint with her favourite mint sauce and for Ugo and herself she’s done  a 3 bird roast. We wouldn’t normally undertake such a large task but she wanted us all to have our favourites. I struggled to eat a small Christmas pudding afterwards.

A nice couple of days started to go downhill then. Ju was very quiet and excused herself to go to the loo. She was there quite a while and when she eventually rejoined us looked very pale. I asked her quietly what was wrong and found she was in great pain and her bowels were not holding again. We had to go home. Sadly we made our goodbyes saying we wanted to give them plenty of time to travel to Ugo’s family in the Midlands. Fortunately they accepted this. We made our way home where Ju took some fast acting morphine and got into bed. It was about 2 pm by then. There were a couple of trips to the loo early on and I couldn’t persuade her to have a cuppa at all. She lay there watching TV and resting while I worked on emails just occasionally sticking my head in. When I did so at 8 pm she was well away. I turned the TV off, and her light, went back to my room and just listened out for her waking.

I woke Ju at 7.am after eleven hours of solid sleep without waking once.She seemed to be a lot better and got up to see to the varmints. By half eight they were done and dusted and Ju said “Come on then. let’s hit the sales.” After checking I wasn’t hallucinating and she wasn’t running a temperature I ran to the car in case she changed her mind. She hates shopping…..I love it. It was well worth her while though since she got some nice outfits.We we’re home by half eleven though and things still seemed OK. The  rest of the day went well. Today it wasn’t such an early start but the girls were still done by 9 am and Ju was taking me to a different sale. We’d done quite well and got some nice clothes each before we stopped for coffee. As she finished I noticed something wrong and knew it was time to go.We made it home and Ju’s stomach betrayed her again. She’s back in bed. She’s very unhappy at what’s happening though I ask her to remember what the alternative is.Tomorrow I’ll get some imodium and see if it can stop the problem for now though as soon as she takes it there is usually a period of painful constipation. Sometimes the morphine helps and sometimes not with the pain. Her biggest worry is letting herself down in public but I try to say it can’t be helped and she can’t isolate herself on the off chance.That’s no life for anyone.