R.I.P.Sharkey II & Welcome Stan

Sunday 22nd Feb 2015

Circumstances conspired against me yesterday so that it was 1.30 am before my light went off last night. That meant a slightly later start this morning of 5.02 am. It sounds good but meant just three and a half hours again. Still, I can cope with it. My usual visit to the loo with an indecisive bladder meant not logging on until 5.10 am and I was slightly disappointed when I did with the amount of mail waiting. Can’t you lot write to me after breakfast or something?  There were about four responses to the blog which was nice, and it seemed to have gone down well on the music front. I take this opportunity to remind you that I’m happy to take requests and I’ll try to find something nice.

I went through to the kitchen at 6.30 am to feed my pals and Sharkey II was noticeable by his absence. It wasn’t pleasant to find him floating belly up at the top of the tank well beyond any hope of the kiss of life. He’s my first ever loss other than natural age. I’m absolutely devastated as it’s only been a week and in that time he’s become a firm favourite. A beautiful, sleek graceful fish. I promise I didn’t do it from moustache envy. I note that perhaps the pump isn’t working at full capacity and wonder if it has some bearing on matters even though there is an airstone giving it some stick in there. I shall ask Mike to take a look when I get him up. I cleared him from the tank before he was cannibalised and placed him in a little container. I feel cruel for consigning him to the rubbish.Food went in for the others and they carried on as though nothing had changed. Maybe there will be a memorial service once my back is turned.

After taking my meds I made a coffee which I took back to my desk with me. More mail coming in all the time but by 8.45 am I was starting to keep pace with it. I knew that was going to change later when we went out for lunch. I kept pace until 10.00 am when I went to wake up the rest of the mourning party with a cuppa. I needed his help in seeing to the pump before we decided where to go for lunch and what to do today. He’s not renowned for speed. To be fair when I walked in and told his coffee was there, I added that I was going to say the three little words he’s longed to hear “I need you” typical response though when he said ” I thought at the least the words would have been The Lottery’s  Ours”. He did get up though. He sat for so long looking at his tablet I almost fell asleep before we finally started on the pump. Once it had a good clean it was right as rain again. Then he told me what he’s been looking at the tablet for, it was to confirm Sharkey hadn’t died through my fault. It was because we hadn’t been given a fresh water fish at all, but one that needed brackish water and of course I hadn’t added salt. Also, far from the four inch fih I’d expected this could reach 13″ which was far too much for my tank. That’s a shop I shan’t want to visit again.

When we’d done Mike got washed and dressed and we headed off for lunch. All the way to Rhyl to the Red Cafe where we’d been last week so we could get some sponges for the filter from our usual fish shop, and to see if they had a pictus in. They didn’t. And though there was a beautiful large plec there I didn’t want it. I wanted something that moves a bit. We came away with the sponges, a new air pipe and some food. While we were in Rhyl, for the first time ever there I was accosted in the street for money from a homeless person. Though I did hand over money for a meal I couldn’t help but wonder if she was genuinely homeless and whether the money was going for food in the end.  By the time we got home it was about 3.00 pm. Mike stayed another hour while I tried to keep my eyes open and then said his goodbyes at 4.00 pm. He was my excuse not to work so I dragged myself to the computer and screamed. 212 waiting. I could only work until 6.00 pm before having to make myself a sandwich for tea so I watched a couple of Big Bang Theories and fell asleep. I stayed there until 8.00 pm and with some reluctance came back through to work. I gave it till 10.00 pm then started the blog. Anything else can wait till the morning.

Monday.

Idle Human, bed glued to your back is it? Well maybe it seems like that. I was in bed for just gone 11.00 pm last night and light off at midnight yet it was 6.11 am when I woke. And even when I did, there was a reluctance to get up even though I wouldn’t sleep again. My bladder decided that for me and up I got for a visit to the loo. Only when I came back did I power up the monster where I found only half a dozen messages or so from last night, but a hole horde of them from this morning. I got started. I could only work until 7.00 am before having to go through to the fish. The morning light is a bit better so I could see some activity before the lights went on. Best of all was seeing the ancistrus out of it’s hidey-ole. As I turned the light on, he disappeared back to where he’s dug himself in underneath a shell. I feel a little guilty for having not put an area of sand down for him to dig into but he seems to have done well enough from the gravel. Big Al was unusually out of his corner and performing some beautiful arcs in front of me, little Al was matching him stroke for stroke. Pepper didn’t seem interested. As usual I wished them good morning as the light went on and as usual Morecambe came straight to my voice. Wise followed but at a much slower pace. Even one of the bronze corys came for a look. I stuck two algae tablets to the inside of the tank to disintegrate slowly and hopefully to interest the plecs then gave some of the new food, all in one, to the rest who attacked like they were kept hungry for  week , they love it. For any of you tank enthusiasts out there, keep an eye open for foodstuffs by Fish Science. It’s really good stuff and is the result of someone going it alone after many years developing fish food for one of the top manufacturers.

Seeing the fish happy I got on with taking my meds and making my coffee to bring back. I also put a load of washing in the machine then came back through. I got stuck in. About 8.40 am I went back to the kitchen and put the washing on the drier mode so it would be ready to put on the radiator before lunch time. The first batch of mail kept me going until 10.00 am with the interruptions but I wasn’t worried. I’d no intentions of going out today. After that it was time for some kind of bravery. I refreshed my first mail account and opened the second. Oh my, will I never learn that you people never sleep. As Australia is heading in that direction, The U.S. is waking up and Europe is already on line. The Philippines is a little ahead but online now (when it works) and Thailand is in mid afternoon writing to break new records.Some very good blog posts, some adverts for the release of new books, some personal but very funny mail and even a couple of cons, it all flowed through my hands via my mouse. All of  a sudden it was almost lunchtime. I went to the kitchen and decided I’d better empty the bin since I put something in and it bounced straight back out again. Then the drier stopped so I took everything out, folded it and put it in the airing cupboard for now. I took my pre-food tablet, buttered some bread then loaded the microwave while I had a cigarette. A beef stew with dumplings today. I prepared myself a tray with a light mousse for pudding and added my after food tablets to the corner of the tray. As I ate I watched an episode of Murder she Wrote. Once over I washed the pots and came back through.

I don’t know whether you’ve noticed, but I’m not falling asleep and missing the end of Murder she Wrote as much as I did with my antiques show. I’m not sure what that means yet. What I do know is it was flippin’ hard to keep my eyes open doing my afternoon stint on the mail. I was nodding, my right hand would jerk and the mouse would be off the desk dangling down the side of my chair in my hand while my head was going forward at a rate of knots towards the desk and a very hard ash tray. There must have been some recognition of the incipient danger running through my brain, as my eyes struggled to open and wake me up. Proof that it worked is evident by the 50% less bruising I had than usual. At 2.15 pm I had to admit defeat and got through to the lounge. ( For all you clever clogs sitting there saying I only went in for Father Brown, I didn’t even turn the telly on. Anyway Father Brown is over). I sat in my chair and relaxed I was falling asleep, having a dream and waking up, and repeating the whole thing. I know my wife was with me tough sometimes it was another person too but I can’t remember the context now. By 3.00 pm I’d come back through ready to go into battle again. I don’t know how many I shifted or what time things changed but there it was again, I was woken up by my head flying towards the desk. It was 4.30pm. Not only woken for my  programme but somehow I’d also signed out of my messages I was getting less done that when I go out.

Time to watch my PYMWYMI (Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is for future reference). I managed to stay the course. When the next programme started I went to make myself some tea which I then ate while the questions were being asked. My excuse for not answering- my mouth was full. At 6.00 pm instead of the usual, I watched an old episode of Law and Order ten turned everything off and came back to sign in again. So much mail, I would have questioned whether I’d done anything all day if I couldn’t actually see the time these were received. I just plodded on and on and on until they were done and refreshed. By about 10.45 I was up to date and not stupid enough to refresh again. I took the opportunity to start on the blog instead.

Tonight I’m going to do two records to please the two ladies who asked for them and also to say thanks to them both for taking the time to comment.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FYFUqxypkbA

Annie Lennox- Why for Elaine Canham an excellent blogger and friend.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_n3ebuL1cPA

Elvis Presley-In the Ghetto for my friend Lynne who writes as Lasvegaslinny

Tuesday.

So I managed bed just before midnight and still managed a half hour or so read before putting the light out. Lie down, start coughing, sit up, take a drink and repeat. I know why they call it a nagging cough now. I was awake at 3.43 am, probably overflowing from all the little sips of drink. I made my way to the bathroom feeling like a tugboat awash on a sea of lime juice. When I eventually got back I set the computer to warm up and checked my mail. Just half a dozen from last night and 53 from the morning which only averages out at 13 per hour which doesn’t seem bad for a change. I made a start. By 6.00 am I was over the half way mark but I decided to feed the fish so there wouldn’t be a mad rush if I forgot the time later. Cough, cough, cough, so no way I was creeping up on them. I put the kitchen light on and went straight over to do the same with the tank. Morecambe and Wise came straight over, Pepper did a loop de loop close to the front and the two bronze corys played tag. Big Al and Little Al seemed to be enjoying a swim in and out the branches of the bog wood. Even the hoplos seemed to be having a sort of game swimming to the surface and back. The plecs just lay sunning themselves, very inactive. The pretty V shaped tail of the ancistrus was showing as it tried to disappear from sight. Of the synodontis there was no sign. I wasn’t worried though. I places a little flake in for Morecambe and Wise to ignore, stuck one of the new algae tablets to the tank wall an dropped some algae pellets to the floor. Everyone raced for those so I dropped a couple more near the shall and the synodontis came out for an undisturbed nibble.

Leaving the fish happy I came away and dealt with my sprays then got my mug of milk to take my tablet. I added sweeteners to what was left of the milk and made a coffee. Once I’d taken my drink through I was able to wash and dress ready for going out. There was now time for a little more mail before going out at 8.00 am. Instead of me travelling to Chester by my usual bus we had decided to meet along the route at a Supermarket and I  would travel by the bus I always used to take. So, in plenty of time I got my shoes on ( it takes an age), gathered the things I was taking for her ( the gloves we forgot last time), donned my coat and gloves  and got my go-go sticks at the ready. Times beautifully for 8.00 am ( as if I’d say any different) I left the house and started walking to the bus stop.The bus stop was full of yammering kiddies and dammit I was early. Fortunately the school bus wasn’t too long in coming and there were a couple of quiet minutes until mine arrived. As I’d never got off at this particular stop before I’d had to guess how long the journey would be. I said about 45 minutes for me and about 15 for Yvonne. She wasn’t leaving Chester until 8.45 am. I arrived at he bust stop at 8.58 am and proceeded to press 5 sets of crossing requests to get from one side of this convoluted junction to the other, then a breath grabbing few minutes to walk to the front of the store. I arrived and stood catching my breath popping a cough sweet in my mouth to hold the coughs back from Super Nag who can hear a wheeze at 50 paces. I’d just found the energy to turn round when there was a call and she hove into view with the little figurehead at the prow pointing in my direction and laughing manically.

Yvonne and I hugged and I blew Reuben a kiss in case his insanity was catching. We went inside. I suggested a coffee before we started shopping so we went to MaDonald’s. I had a coffee while Yvonne had a soft drink Reuben could share, worryingly it always seems more full after he’s had a drink. Yvonne and Roobs shared a cheeseburger which meant he got the bread and the cheese part and showed disdain for the meat. Yvonne bought me a bacon  (sort of ) bap which I didn’t actually want but hey, who listens to me. I thought I was safe as Roobs doesn’t didn’t seem keen on bacon. Within moments he was pointing at it. I offered a piece of bacon thinking it would head floorwards as in the past and I’d be left alone. No way, all I hear was “More” continuously until the only thing I was left to eat were the tablets I was supposed to have after food rather than instead of it. We He finished breakfast and he went back in his trolley ready to wander round the shop. He’s much safer restrained. I got him some nice jeans and a couple of nice tops and Yvonne picked up a nice shirt. We picked up a few bits and bobs as we went around  and believe me, we really went around. We were very thorough. So much so that when w reached the tills we found we’d been in there for two hours. Yvonne needed to get home for work and I needed to get home to deal with all these people who have nothing better to do with their time than write. We walked together down towards the bus stops. She’d be using the one I got off at this morning while I was staying on the same side of the road as now. I had just one crossing button to press, Yvonne had to deal with 5. My bus arrived just as she got to her bus stop but her bus pulled up directly too. So, we were both able to wave goodbye at the same time.

I was home again at 1.00 pm having needed a wee so badly I’d walked past Pauline’s shop yet again. Once the loo was out of the way and I’d put away my little bit of shopping I cam through to take my punishment for having a life. Cruel and unusual punishment judging by some of your posts. I’d given up the idea of an afternoon nap or an escape for 2.15 pm TV. but I hoped I could manage a 4.00 pm finish to get something to eat before my PYMWYMI. It was hard going, especially staying awake but at 4.05 pm I was down to the last 20 or so. I broke off and made a corned beef hash. As I finished that my programme came on. I put two matchsticks to hold up my eyelids and enjoyed the fight. I stayed there for the quiz but fell asleep before it was quite over, waking up 15 or so minutes later to find the news on. I had the last few minutes of another quiz then came through. Laughingly I left the TV on standby in case I got the chance to watch something later but the god of blogs chained me to my chair and here I remained until I was allowed to go for my tablets at 10.00 pm, and to turn the TV of properly. At 11.00 pm I gave up on post to concentrate on the blog. The rest can wait fopr tomorrow when the backlog problem will be even worse than usual.

Wednesday.

Before I shock you too much, let me explain it was 1.00 am before my light went out last night and gone 2.00 am before I was able to get to sleep. Between discomfort and coughs I’m amazed I got off at all. Now for the shock, it was 6.14 am before I got up. I was horrified, today of all days. It was loo then work in short order. I made the fish wait until 7.30 am before I took a break to see to them. As a treat I got out the bloodworm to give them a treat. It’s in a tray with foil separators like they use for tablets I inserted my thumbnail into a piece of foil intending to peel it back but the contents were still liquid and they just exploded all over me. What little was left went to the fish and I started trying to grab the splashed stuff off my dressing gown to put in. That which had reached the floor I decided the floor could keep. I added algae pellets to make up for the loss.  I really didn’t have time to stand watching them this morning especially now I had to clean the kitchen floor. As soon s I’d dealt with that and no-one could prove a thing, I took my meds and made a coffee.

Back in the bedroom I went about getting ready for the morning and got washed and dressed than at last was able to sit down with some more work. For some reason I didn’t manage much and found I didn’t feel great so returned to the lounge with my coffee. I finished it, ate some malt bread for breakfast and promptly fell asleep. It was still only 8.00 am. It was almost 9.00 am by the time I came too and knew I needed to get a move on. I went to Gmail firsdt to the messages left over from last night as they were personal ones. It took some time but I got those out of the way and deleted the rest. Then I turned to my normal mail box and just started working my way up from the oldest date. It wasn’t even 10.00 am when I heard voice. The door opened and MuJo were there, much earlier than usual. I was very surprised especially as they’d said they were having new tyres put on the car first. That plan had changed for today and they’d come straight to me. I passed them the bags of things I’d picked up for them over the last couple of weeks and went to see to drinks. We sat chatting for a good while.

It was too early for lunch by the time the drinks were gone so I suggested a walk round the shops in Holywell before heading to John’s favourite place, the Chippy. They agreed so off we set. John was able to pick up a Mother’s day card for his mum who’s in her 90’s now and I was able to pick up a couple of things. Having wasted enough time, we went for lunch. I had chips with mince & mushrooms plus mushy peas, MuJo both had fish, chips and peas. After we’d finished we got back in the car and headed for Flint. After we parked up the first stop was Home Bargains where I got a few items and then onto B & M (Bum) Bargains where I got chocolates for the girls in Temptations. That’s where we went next. Ceri wasn’t there but Trudy was and I hadn’t seen her in ages, I also saw Helen and Sian  so managed a few words each. After our refreshments it was gooodbye  girls and back to shopping. Mu managed to get herself a couple of jumpers in the sale so she was delighted. After that, back to the car and home.

3.00 pm back indoors and as John relaxed Muriel went to Pauline’s to get her lottery tickets. They left at 3.50 pm to head back home again.After saying a fond farewell I flew into my room to look at the messages. With what was left from the morning and the new stuff that came in, well lets just  say I need new tissues.  I could only work till 4.30 pm as I didn’t want to be in here working if Lee arrived. I went through and sat in the lounge, coincidentally my PYMWYMI was just starting. Lee arrived at 5.00 pm and we sat talking about his impending fatherhood (April) and whether he needed anything for the baby. His dad arrived at 5.30 pm sans Matthew who apparently had just started work this afternoon/evening. He’s going to miss out on his little treats as I forgot to send them back with Dil later. As soon as the usual quiz was over we set up the table and started playing. Scrabble first, That game was mine. Nomination, despite a promising start I was robbed, my brother has no conscience and isn’t easily taken in by a facade of pure miser either. Then Crazy 8’s the the bloody highwayman struck again without even wearing a mask. Throughout all the games there had been constant jollity and little stories being told. Nothing had been played with any speed. They left at 9.30 pm giving me time to tidy, wash the pots and get my evening meds before burying myself in here. It’s going to be a very long night.

There it is Pops

I’m so excited Pops

Thursday.

As predicted it was a long night. It was almost 2.00 am before my light went out but at least sleep came easily. I woke at 4.07 am but my kind body informed me I wasn’t ready to get up and my bladder wasn’t pushing enough to make me. I went back to sleep again. At 6.33 am I woke again and this time was the real thing. This time my bladder gave a little twinge just to let me know that my legs were on the wrong side of the covers and they should be walking by now. I walked. I came back relieved in a few minutes and powered up the computer. Amazingly, I thought I could cope today. I could only work for about half an hour before the cries of the fish could be heard. “Feed us” they said. I turned the kitchen light on then the tank immediately after. No point in keeping them waiting. I opened the flap and sprinkled some pellets in which they went for straight away. Then I gave them half a sachet of daphnia and I was left wondering when I’d bought the piranhas . I had every intention of taking some pictures of the fish today but I’ve not managed a good shot at all because of the reflected light. For now I’m just going to entertain you with a couple of blasts from the past…..

The Infamous Oscar

Beautiful Bernie

After I fed the beasties I took my meds and made a coffee to bring back.  At about 9.00 am I got washed and dressed though I hadn’t any intention of going out today. I do have something niggling at the back of my mind but can’t put my finger on it. I stayed in my seat all morning keeping pace with the mail coming in and once I was up to date in my main account I opened the secondary one and started there. I cleared all the duplicate emails until I came to the personal ones which don’t appear in my main account. I dealt with those, hopefully spreading a few laughs as I went. Finally, as I cleared the last one it was 11.50 am and time to think about lunch. I busied myself with some bread and butter then put a cottage pie in the microwave, turned the TV on ready for Bargain Hunt then as the pie was ready, settled down to watch.

As it came to an end I was allowing myself to settle down n the chair. The Zzzz’s were just starting to appear when my phone went. It took me a few moments to understand the source of the sound but when I did I found a message from Mike. He’s on his way and he told me all about the special friend he’s bringing with him for me. I’m very excited. Roll on 3.30 pm. In the meantime it’s just 1.00 pm and time to get back to work. Back at my desk I find no-one has been going mad for a change and the post is quite reasonable. I think I’ll be able to manage. I worked until 3.10 pm then left to put the kettle on, I knew Mike would need a coffee when he got here and I’ve no doubt the guest he’s bringing will need to relax. Mike walked in at 3.20 pm so I assume he’d used the convertible jet facility and landed at a local airfield. He handed me a bag which I took into the kitchen and gingerly opened. Inside was a polystyrene box which had been well taped so I had to use scissors on it. When I opened it there was a clear plastic bag filled with water and the most gorgeous pictus of about 3″. A huge whiplash moustache on it’s face swung about as he tried to turn circle in the bag. I started to undo it. After a lot of effort the bag was open. I tried to get rid of all the blue air I’d caused trying to undo the bag and rolling the neck down I said hello to Stan as I lowered the bag into the tank for the first acclimatisation session of 20 mins. I went through to the lounge and paid Mike, this is the nicest visitor he’s ever brought.

At the end of the twenty minutes I went through and added some water to the bag so Stan became used to that too. He’d need another twenty minutes now and then he’d be in the tank. When the time was up Mike was sitting closer to the kitchen than me so I asked him to see to the release. He did so gladly for me and called out that Stan was doing the full tour of the tank. I was glad.I hope he liked it enough to stay. Personally I think Mike will fall a little in love this weekend and want one of his own when he gets home. He got Stan from his own fish man at home when he went in to see about a new and bigger tank. It looks like he might have a 5 foot one before long. I’ve had to do some considering and decided I probably can’t get away with any more than a 3 foot tank in the space available in the lounge.That’s still enough for me to have some of the type of fish I love so much. Maybe I’ll just transfer most of my usual fish into a new tank and close the kitchen tank down.

I made some tea and we watched a bit of TV before I excused myself for a while. I wanted to see a programme at 8.oo pm so I needed to clear some work first. When I went back through it was for a DIY SOS to help a family with disabled 3 year olds living in a property too small for them. There was an 8 year old boy too.Dad was forced to work away from home to earn enough to keep them all and mum, a midwife, was devoting herself to the boys. The older brother was a little gem. The team did a 9 day job on the house and changed it beyond all recognition with the help of local tradesmen and friends. The response was phenomenal and it goes without saying there were tears at the end, even some from the family. It’s heartwarming to know people can still respond to things like this without putting themselves first.                                                               After that, I came back through to work. suggestions from a 24 year old woman ( ?) living in Paris but from Togo suggesting I might be a suitable partner and a good father for our children scared the life out of me but entertained Mike no end. A second and third missive to say she appreciated my honesty about my age and having a daughter older than her didn’t faze her in the least and cracked Mike up. I nearly cracked him myself. While I had him here I showed him a tank I’d found locally with it’s own stand that looked well cared for, was a very good price and just the right size, it had him running round with a tape measure in his hand deciding where we’d make space and even starting to move things. I suggested it might be  little premature. He left to watch TV and I got on with my mail.

By 11.00 pm I had it down to a manageable level and turned to doing this blog. Maybe tonight will mean an earlier finish.

Friday.

Not quite as early as hoped but I was still in bed by 12.15 am. I read until 1.00 am and then settled down to dream. I think it was about weddings in which I wasn’t a willing participant but everyone else seemed to think it was OK. I wasn’t able to talk for some reason, perhaps fear of the club being held by a rather ‘statuesque’ lady who also carried two crying infants. I was up at 3.23 am and to be honest I think I was quite relieved. Actually that came next. Once I’d been to the loo I powered up the computer and started on the mail. I worked till 6.00 am then went to feed the fish. Stan seems to be another one for hanging around in corners. In his case it may have something to do with the light  which is quite bright. I need to but some sand or gravel and put some plants in. I know pictus like to hide in caves where they can, so I’ll see if the tank can be rearranged to accommodate one. Of course if I get a new tank I can make sure that’s the first thing in there. I dropped some algae pellets in and a little flake and everyone moved except Stan. I added some daphnia and Stan came alive zooming along practically hoovering it up. I wonder what he’ll be like with bloodworm tomorrow.

Next job was to take my meds and I used the opportunity to fill my diabetic pill box for when I go out. I used the last on Wednesday with MuJo. Once I’d taken everything I prepared my mug for a drink then fetched my meds drawer through so I could fill my weekly meds boxes.Once done, I put the drawer away, wrote out a prescription request for next week to restock then made my coffee. It was then 7.00 pm as it’s quite a lengthy job, especially if you’re still concentrating on fish at the same time. I worked for an hour then went to do Mike’s coffee and give him a shout. He’s not put his alarm on today. It always used to be, Up at 8 (Thanks Cat Stevens), out at 9 and arrive at his Dad’s about 10. Now it starts call at 8 and hope for the best. I know I roused him a bit because he acknowledged the coffee. At quarter past I went through and noisily added a radiator rack to the radiator under the window. That also woke him and I got a “Wha?” After that I left him and at 8.40 am he came out more or less under his own power. At 9.20 am I got dressed and went to Pauline’s leaving Mike sitting there in his pyjama bottoms. Twenty minutes later when I returned he was still there. He started a conversation about immigration which lasted until almost 10.00 pm when he finally went to get ready and I went back to work. At about 10.15 am he came through to say goodbye and left to start his journey. It would be at least 11.15 am before he got there in time to have a coffee before going out for lunch.

I carried on working until 11.30 am at which time I went through to start making Mike’s bed. I was perhaps half way through when the doorbell knocked. It was the warden who hearing my breathing thought I was on the point of a coronary. Once I’d sat down a few minutes I was OK though I’d hoped she might have started the mouth to mouth by then. We chatted about the week and s usual the conversation got round to the fish. She wondered why I didn’t have the tank in the lounge. I had to explain there had been a tank in the lounge in the past. one of seven in the house and that this one was where it always had been and was the last of them. I’d left it there just expecting the tank to die off. I told her about the latest addition and she asked if I’d mind her taking a look. I didn’t mind at all if she didn’t mind scaling the ironing pile. She thought Stan was beautiful and Pepper very pretty but the Siamese were the only ones she recognised as her fish had been the tetra’s, mollys and the guppys  that most tanks have. When she left I finished making the bed complete with hospital corners on the sheet and then almost collapsed into it.

Time for lunch. It was 12.15 pm so I put Bargain Hunt on and slammed something in the micro. It was only when I’d finished I couldn’t remember if I’d taken a tablet first. Oops! I did take the after ones just in case.At 1.00 pm I returned to work and started trying to work my way through both mail addresses. I wasn’t doing very well as my eyelids weren’t co-operating at all. I found myself falling forwards for the forehead tattoo quite a bit. In the end at some stage it just happened. I woke up at 4.15 pm with neck ache. I wandered through to the lounge ready for PYMWYMI and wondered what time Mike would be home. My programme was good but I let myself down quite badly by not seeing the very end, nor the start of the next programme. When I opened my eyes a little voice said “Hello”, so at least my last question had been answered. We watched the quiz and then I made something to eat while we watched two more. I even remembered my tablets.  At 7.00 pm I went for a shower which I hoped would wake me a bit. I did feel a bit better afterwards as I went back in to sit with Mike. We saw a sports quiz  then Mastermind where Mike had to keep checking to see if I’d nodded off again  and it was a close run thing. Than I had a Big Bang Theory. I’d probably run out of excuses not to work by this point and came on through. I think it must be this bronchitis getting to me as it’s not as though I burn the candle at both ends is it.

It was fun trying to catch up and I really was making progress but at 11.00 pm I had to stop to give me time with the blog and I don’t think I’ll go back to it later as tomorrow is shopping day. I don’t think I shall be buying a new tank this weekend after all though, as Mike has fitted an air curtain to the existing tank and decided I need a stronger pump.I concur. A new tank can wait.

Saturday.

I managed bed at 12.05 am last night ( this morning?) so I had chance of a read before sleep. I did have a wee problem settling down before sleep as I couldn’t get comfortable, but eventually it came. I got up at 4.29 am so didn’t feel too hard done by. About three and a half hours on top of the skiving I did yesterday. I nipped to the loo before signing on in case it was a stop-start morning but the flow was uninterrupted. I hoped the same could be said of the mail. Well, in fact it could. I worked on the last of yesterday’s stuff and started today’s before knocking off at 6.00 am to see to the fish. First I gave them a frozen block of bloodworm from the freezer which Stan loved a he barged his way through the rest f the fish lining up for breakfast. Then I sprinkled in some of the new formula which sent them all into a bit of a tizzy. It was fun watching the tail of one fish swiping the face of another in it’s eagerness to feed, I couldn’t help but wonder if the slapped one got it’s own back later. At some points it looks like there’s a James Herbert creation of a massive fish with lots of tails waving. Time to concentrate on me….. I took a food tab and then the rest of my meds followed by the usual timing cigarette. Then I ate a bowl of cereal, unusual for me but at least I won’t have to worry about eating tonight.

I took my coffee back to the bedroom and did a little more mail before getting dressed. Amazingly I remembered to top up my phone. It was 6.55 am when I looked at my watch, time to get the kettle on. At 7.00 am I took Mike’s coffee through and non too gently “Yoo Hoo’ed” him awake. I left him to fall asleep again as usual but moments after leaving the room the first alarm went off. I didn’t go back and ten minutes later the second alarm went. I thought I’d leave it till the third one this morning and call him again but lo and behold the sneaky burger slithered his was through to the lounge after that second alarm. Mind you, I went through to tell him he’s upset my guess today and he was asleep in the chair until I spoke. Today I have to give him credit for 1 Call and 2 Alarms. Minutes later the third alarm went off anyway as ‘someone’ had forgotten to turn it off. The chair was his home until the last possible  minute and he was dressed and ready to leave at 7.55 am. I was surprised but pleased since I’d had my shoes and coat on for at least half an hour by then. We set off and were at the Supermarket by 8.15 am. I managed to it the jackpot at that hole in the wall machine so I knew I’d eat again this week.

Once inside the store we found my Pepsi Max on a special in the litre bottles and bought two. I wandered over to get some potatoes and then we went to get some flowers for Ju. It took 3 bunches to make me happy this morning though of course I had to defer to my Florist Friend who would actually arrange them. We had a good wander round the store before heading for the part that actually feeds us. First some micro meals, sausages, roast beed slices and yoghurts. Then cakes, bread, puddings before picking up some tinned veg and milk. Then there are sweets ( not for us), pop and biscuits. Anything else I want I try to buy from Pauline to keep my local shop going. After going through the checkout and trying to slow my heart down after thinking I’d bought shares in the firm we moved on to the cafe. Shopping is very dry work. An Americano each and of course save the little plastic stickers from the mugs for a free one. We went round to get our cigarettes and I had a look ( as always ) at the photographic section to see if there are any fantastic bargains on frames. There were though I also bought a calendar as Mike said he wanted one for his Dad with enough room to write on. I don’t think he’s too keen on it though as he becomes fixated on specifics like shape rather than function. Still, no-one is forced to use it.

From the supermarket we traveled a short distance to Pets at Home to check out their pumps and I ended up buying one at £30 because it seemed powerful enough for the job.I also bought three plants to try and give Stan some shade. Just as well I’m not buying a tank soon. On to Flint to find some drawer knobs for Yvonne as the shop that sells them has run out in her area. Which really means, Yah Boo Sucks Yvonne, maybe you’ll let me get them next time we see them instead of delaying. Shock Horror, my branch had also run out but I asked a member of staff who knew that some had come in on a palette and he was willing to get me some.I was very grateful. I bought a couple of other things from the same shop and then it was time for a coffee. At Temptations Ceri was in with Kyle and young Charlotte was manning the card counter. Mike looked happy to get a little bit of banter in today. We had a look round a couple more shops for calendars in  case there were any square ones but the only ones we saw had been reduced to £5 and were not really suitable fare for an 80 odd year old ( or his Dad).

Back in the car and head off for lunch. Though where was optional the car automatically brought us to The Ivy. The usual suspects were all there and it was nice to get a kiss from Angie when we went in. She asked if we wanted out usual drinks and set about making them. We saw Tariq briefly as he dropped a cartoon on the table as he flew by. It made me laugh. There had been a menu change so Mike was able to order a lamb shank for his lunch while I chose some pork and leek sausages, mash and garden peas. Once the order was in were went outside for a smoke. Despite the sunshine it’s still cold outside and Mike was right to put his coat on. When we went back in, we didn’t have long to wait for food. I called Rob over as we ate and asked a few questions about his fish tanks since he’ll be responsible for looking after the Ivy’s fish population if Tariq decides to go ahead and start a small pet area. He upset Mike by telling him about a beautiful 5′ tank for sale in  the area very cheaply. Mind you, if it had come to my house it wouldn’t have left again. Are you sure you lot don’t want to send me 10c each to paypal? We eventually said out goodbyes and Mike ran us home. It was earlier than usual so when we’d unpacked and put away and Mike had fitted the new pump which created an air curtain along the back of the tank, I was able to attack my post sooner than usual. I was rather pleased with myself that I was up to date by 5.30 pm. I joined Mike in the lounge. He was playing on his tablet so I watched an old film The Scarlet and the Black. It left me with a lot of moral questions at the end. Worse still, the next programme was also a film which hit me badly with a story of the Warsaw Ghetto. It caught me so strongly in places I was forced to turn over for The 39 Steps, a big but very enjoyable twist on the original. At 9.00 pm I came back through.

It took me a while to reach the stage of being up to date again but at least it was early enough to allow me to do the blog post while still on Saturday.

I wish you all a fantastic week ahead.

 

Birthday Sunday & The Horrible People Play

Sunday 18th Jan 2015

4.11 am today and though it’s my birthday I woke to no fanfare. I don’t understand it. Perhaps next year. Mind you, it would have been fun to see whether Mike could sleep through it. I popped to the loo and as soon as I got back turned the computer on. Let’s see how well the blog did last night. I was really happy to see there weren’t too many emails so that I spend another day hunched over the machine. I worked till 6.00 am then went to take the first antibiotic of the day. Because I had to turn the kitchen light on it seemed reasonable to do the fish as well. They knew I was there after all. I tuned on the tank light. My expectations of finding Big Al with a Happy Birthday banner were dashed when I saw him take one look at me and hide under the bridge.”Well, thanks for nothing” I said.my voice quickly attracting Morecambe and Wise to the top of the tank to listen to me. Down below it was business as usual as Little Al and Sharkey jostled for the best position under the feeding flap.

I put some flake in for Morecambe and Wise then dropped some pellets on the heads of the eager beavers below. The two new synodontis swam over to scour the bottom for food and the mid sized plec did the same. It was quite funny seeing them snuffling along the bottom searching between the gravel for food.  Big Al obviously wasn’t coming out while I was there this morning which must mean I’m in trouble again as I’ll never believe he’s shy.

I closed the food flap and turned to take my tablet. It wasn’t worth my taking the time to disturb myself after so I took all my usual meds too then made a coffee to take back. As I passed through the lounge I almost dropped the drink when something seemed to loom before me. OMG, it was the balloon from Temptations yesterday just moving in the breeze created by my movement. I would remember to come back later and put my cards up. By 7.20 am I had cleared the decks even having gone in to facebook and answered a couple of messages.I went through to the kitchen to leave my cup in the sink then sat in my chair in the lounge watching it start to get lighter. At some stage I nodded off until 8.35 am I returned to the bedroom and started work again. It was nice there seemed to be no pressure and a few comments were starting to come through about the blog and a few birthday wishes. Then my mobile started too with well wishers from withing the family. Yes you cheeky beggars, there still are some.

9.45 am and I heard Mike heading towards the loo. I left my post and went to make him a drink. I knew he wouldn’t go back to bed again. His drink was ready on the table when he came through. I stood and chatted to him as I opened and read my cards eliciting the odd grunt. I sat down and chatted as he had his drink. I suggested we could go into Prestatyn and get the free drinks owed us by Marks and Spencer’s after his disastrous dinner before Christmas. Trouble was neither of us made a move to get dressed until 11.00 am by which time it was too late to do anything except go for lunch. We both went to dress and oddly enough ended up in exactly the same trousers. No, not the same pair you ninny, we each owned a pair. At 11.30 we headed off and arrived at the Bells at 11.50 am. The girls were there before us, waiting in the car park and waving as we pulled in. We went inside.

Karen went to the bar to order soft drinks and I gave Mike my voucher for a free birthday meal. He  wouldn’t let me pay for the other meals so he did that on his card. Karen had found a table so I went to sit down and Jo brought our drinks over.I passed a gift each over as they placed gifts for me on the table. There was a lovely Uncle card and I was given some sheepskin slippers, a beautiful maroon/white shirt and a maroon jumper.They were really nice. I gave my thanks before we got down to the serious business of food. At that moment there was no-one in the queue so the four of us wandered over     ( at a run) and created a queue of our own. I chose beef as my meat and was kindly given an extra piece because it was my birthday. I went on to help myself to all the veg and two kinds of potatoes. When the girls got back to the table I saw the chef must have thought we were all having a birthday. Karen and Jo had 3 Yorkshire puddings each and Jo had even more slices of meat than me..There’s no way I’ll ever get to look like her so I needn’t build my hopes up.

I remembered to take my foodie tabs both before and after the meal.Today I even had a pudding which Jo kindly paid for. I tell you I was thoroughly spoiled. We sat chatting for a while then I left to have a cigarette outside. Mike joined me. When we came back Jo went as Karen wouldn’t be on her own. At 1.30 pm we were ready to leave. The girls were ready to go to Rhyl to a shop they wanted while Mike and I were also going to Rhyl in search of fish. In the shop we like here was a fantastic catfish about 6″ long but much as I loved it, I didn’t want one fish on it’s own. I settled for two hoplo catfish which are only about 2″ long but they’ll grow.

Finally we headed for home and put the bag on the edge of the tank to acclimatise it. Then I could go to work. The screams might have been silent but they were there as I opened the mail box to way over 200 messages with more arriving all the time.After 20 minutes I added some of the tank water to the bag with the fish so they’d get used to that. Morecambe was swimming around the bag being very nosy about he new neighbours. Back to work. I was not making any headway. I went into facebook and answered two messages, but also found literally hundreds of birthday greetings that I’d never get through. I resolved to put a notice up tomorrow to thank everyone.The last 20 minutes had already passed before I remembered to go and release the new fish who may be called Abbot and Costello. I haven’t quite decided.I had two short breaks to give Mike a bit of company during the evening, one was to make our tea. Other than that I’ve sat here despairing of ever catching up. But, just minutes before midnight I did, so this has been a late night. Now 12.50 am and my reading time has evaporated. It’s been a lovely day though.

Monday.

Here we are again. Have I slept? It’s a 4.49 am start and I know I’m awake but feel I shouldn’t be. That’s how the day started today. I got out of bed, donned my dressing gown and walked to the loo almost normally, though that’s not saying much in my case. After asking my bladder to pee or get off the pot, why bring me this far if you’re not sure you want to go or not? I came back and switched on the computer. Though I logged into my mail I actually visited Facebook first. There were even more birthday wishes than yesterday and two more messages. I was forced to write a general, cover-all thank you to everyone or I’d have been doing individual replies for hours. I answered the two messages then logged out and came back to my emails. Amazingly there were only 5 from last night and the rest were as fresh as a daisy. No frauds, fakers or conmen today, just pure blogs almost. There were a couple of very easy to deal with adverts. (straight to the bin ). I started on liking, commenting and/or re-tweeting  some of the wonderful posts you’d all made though I can’t understand why you’re all up at that time. If it’s dark here you should all be in bed there, wherever your particular there is. It’s those bolshie Aussies that upset the applecart determined to have their day in direct contrast to us.

At 6.10 am I remembered my 6.00 am tablet and went to take it. After taking it I looked in the tank even though the light was off. I could see one of my new hoplo catfish swimming about but the other one was obviously dead and looked partly chewed. I quickly turned the light on. Yes, definitely dead,not moving at all. I was wondering whether to grab the net and remove the corpse before Mike woke when the little beggar moved. He must like playing statues and won that game hands fins down. The position he’d been lying in was awkward and I think a darker patch to his head misled me about his general condition. I’m so glad. I don’t generally lose my new fish like that. I looked around to see how the others were doing and was momentarily distracted by the attention Morecambe and Wise paid me when I realised I hadn’t seen Big Al. Everyone else was accounted for even the brilliantly disguised plecs, but of Big Al, no sign. I got down on my knees so my head was level with the bottom of the tank. He wasn’t under the bridge nor in the amphora, he wasn’t in the shipwreck but I was fast becoming a nervous wreck. He is getting on in fishy terms poor chap but even a corpse he should be too big too miss. I stood with great difficulty and for some reason looked around the kitchen like he was waiting to jump out and say BOO to me. As I looked back at the tank in despair, there he was, as smug as always and laying at the front of the tank watching me. At first I was flooded with relief ( I must be a masochist) then I became cross that he’d done it which was followed rapidly by How did he do it? The only answer I can come up with is that Somnos took him for a chat and sent him back which if true, bodes ill for me.

I took all my other morning meds and made a coffee to take back to the bedroom with me. Last night Mike had said he could have a lie in today. His Dad has an appointment at 1.00 pm so he doesn’t need to be there until 11.00 am. I pointed out to be there at 11.00 am he’d need to leave here by no later than 10.00 am. To do that he’d need to be up drinking his coffee at 9.00 am. Reluctantly he agreed. I gave him 10 extra minutes and took the coffee through at 9.10 am. I spoke, he answered then went back to sleep. At 9.20 am I reminded him the drink was there, he responded then went back to sleep. At 9.35 am the postman came and just putting a few letters through was able to wake Mike again. It was still almost 9.45 am before he managed to come through to the lounge though. Chances of leaving at 10.00- laughable, of reaching his dad by 11.00 am, impossible. Maybe next week I’ll start at 8.00 am.

With some effort Mike left the house at 10.20 am . I left at the same time to head to the chemist and to Pauline’s. For some reason I decided not to bother cooking today so while I was close by I visited the sandwich shop. I ordered a ham and onion  bap for my lunch and some awful dread power came over me as I ordered a bacon bap which I decided to call breakfast. Just to make it worse I bought an egg custard too. After Pauline’s I went straight back home and chewing my bacon bap I started work again. This welcome break from routine meant my normal lunchtime was blown out of the water but it didn’t stop me from breaking at midday to watch Bargain Hunt. It did mean I had no pots to wash up afterwards though. YAY. I worked from 1.00 -2.15 pm then watched Father Brown which I think has become more habit than pleasure now. It does mean I get a regular break from the screen of course which everyone tells me is good. I fully intended to really put my back into it between 2.15 -4.30 but I’d only just sat down when there was a knock at the door. I wasn’t expecting anyone so I rather gingerly opened the door.  Naturally I opened it wider when I saw an attractive young lady on the step though her suitcase was a worry since I’m not a B &B. She opened her mouth to speak and I was almost blown away by the smell of booze that hit me, apologies if someone is now manufacturing sweets with an obnoxious smell. Then she spoke and the last of my illusions broke.” Buy some freakin’ soap for charity” was an approximation  of what she asked and /or demanded, I wasn’t sure. I moved my hand to the sign on the door I was standing next to that said basically ‘No hawkers. It’s an offense to try and sell in this area, so bugger off and don’t come back’ though not verbatim. She hoisted her case up to rest on one arm and opened it. It was full of a household brand name toilet soap, bath scrubs and other things. “Well?” she said “itzforcharitee.” I tapped the sign and looked at it but it had no effect. I think I heard “deaf git.” I replied as much as possible without stuttering “No thank you, you have to ask the prison warders if we can buy things, that’s why you’re not allowed to sell here.” I thought that might be polite enough and started to close the door . “Flip you too grandpa ” I heard, or words to that effect. I note she didn’t bother with the other bungalows though.

Please note, a bar of soap can cost 30p but can be sold to you for £3.00 on the doorstep like this. If you or someone you care about doesn’t have one, ask the Neighbourhood Watch for a sticker that says you don’t accept door to door sales and that it’s an offence to try. Please leave. If you return you can be arrested. You can point it out to callers. Have an internal door chain fitted and if you’re at all suspicious call the police as they’re always happy to hear about bogus callers. Anyone claiming to be selling for a charity if genuine will be wearing a badge around their neck with name , who they’re selling for and a phone number to check. If you can write the details down when you phone it helps should you need to consult the police.

So, at 4.30 I stopped to watch Antique Road Trip. No women this week but one was the auctioneer most people I know can’t abide.Currently on TV in the US advising a group of Women on antiques. Don’t listen to him ladies. I realised last week that women in this programme have an advantage, one smile at the dealer when they ask for a bargain price and it’s theirs. A man asks with a smile and there’s not a lot off. After that I fell asleep in my chair and didn’t wake up until 6.00 pm when Eggheads came on. I watched that and then returned to work. Someone must be in a good mood because when I refreshed my screen there wasn’t too much there.  I was able to clear most of it by 8.00 pm and take another break. Very unusual for me. At 9.00 pm it was time to bite the bullet though. I came back and refreshed and it’s taken until 10.55 pm to catch up again. I’ve been able to do the blog and I’ll still get to bed before midnight.

In honour of Martin Luther King’s birthday, a song about him.

Tuesday.

I got a 5.18 am today. Wonderful, about 4 hours uninterrupted, dreamless sleep with no horrible little messages running in the background telling me what ice cream to buy in the interval. So why was I so sluggish getting up? I nipped to the loo delighted to be able to put my weight properly on my foot. If Mike was here no doubt he’d tell you what a weight it is and to pity the poor ankle now.                                                                                                                                                                                                     As I came back, I signed in to check the  number of emails overnight. Not too bad, only about 50. I’d only dealt with about ten of them when it was time for my 6.00 am tablet. I went to the kitchen and had it with a drink of Pepsi then turned to the fish. Turning the light on I found  real hive of activity. Everyone was moving around as though excited. I hoped it was at my arrival or at least my arrival bearing food. I placed flake in for Morecambe and Wise and was really surprised to see my new hoplos coming to the surface. Most of my cats are bottom feeders and dwellers. I dropped some pellets in and a free for all began below with barging to push others out of the way of available food. Big Al who was acting like a normal fish this morning and not my trainer, stood his ground. Sharkey, the worst of the bargers made no progress on Big Al at all.

Once they’d been fed, I turned to my normal meds, thinking it a waste of time to come out twice. Once I’d dealt with that I made a drink to take through. Just before I restarted work I tried ebay to check and see if I could find Welsh money there as there’s talk that we’re going to have our own legal tender notes soon. I think it was 1971 we last started with Welsh notes before the Bang of England closed it down. They were beautiful notes. For a while afterwards the notes went on sale as a novelty. I wish I’d bought tons as they’re rare and expensive now. The other thing I was looking at and wan’t really aware of it at the time was fish tanks.  I was in ebay a little later in the day and found I’d saved quite a few to look at. I thought I was happy enough with the one in the kitchen but it looks like I might be considering the lounge as home for one. If I do that it will mean buying some new fish and probably larger ones. Mike thinks I want an Oscar.

 

Try imagining this chap ( or chapess) as being about 8-12 inches long and pure muscle. Capable of drawing blood if it gets your finger in it’s mouth if it doesn’t like you. On the other hand, if it likes you, it can be most loving like Olive my last one who bust her way out of the tank, taking the lid right off, just to join me in bed one night.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       The thing is, to the best of my knowledge, I don’t want another Oscar and didn’t think I wanted a new tank either. But if I do, it will be some large catfish.

I started work again and concentrated on catching up to take any pressure off later. By 9.00am I was in the position of being able to get dressed. Mike had told me last night that he’s going to be at his Dad’s 29th-31st supervising the laying of a floor so there’s no more tripping over carpets. I turned to the computer to send Yvonne a message about taking me shopping that weekend and I found the computer was back on ebay looking at a tank a man can scuba dive in. I don’t know who’s doing it but seriously they need to take a look at the size of my room. A six foot would be the maximum I could take……..If I wanted one that is.                                            I worked through till lunch time playing catch up and then going to my Ancestry to see the hints. At 11.45 am I was glad to move away from the machine for a while.

Lunch was a bing cottage pie which I ate while watching my usual show. Even my pudding came in a plastic tub so the end of the meal saw me washing a side plate, a fork and a spoon. Hard labour indeed. No matter my feelings about the Father Brown series I was determined to skive persevere and so went back to work knowing it was just for an hour and a quarter. There was enough to keep me going and a tad more so something to come back to. I didn’t enjoy it very much again and will now have to consider that I’m never going to so maybe I’d better stop watching them. When it finished t 3.00 pm I was almost glad to return to work but maybe that was just the thought that it was only for an hour and a half. The computer was starting to whinge and whine at overuse when I got the chance at 4.30 pm to let it cool down for a while. I settled in front of the TV with a packet of Quavers and waited for the Antique Road Trip to start. A knock at the door got me out of my seat but it was my chemist lady with my drug run so I didn’t miss much.                                                                                                                                                                                                             Both the competitors bought  few reasonable pieces tonight. I was cross that one stood in the shop and engaged the owner in conversation about the age of some chairs, saying how new they were then taking one outside whispered about how old he knew they really were because of horsehair stuffing etc. To me that’s deceitful. For the second day on the trot he won and I was so disappointed. The auctioneer was very good tonight and cajoled good prices from the audience.

After Road Trip I watched Pointless then as I was about to watch Eggheads had the sudden urge to watch Big Bang Theory and turned over to an episode I must have missed. That kept me occupied until 6.30 pm but then I’d run out of excuses and had to come back through. There was a message from Yvonne saying the doctor is sending a new prescription to the chemist for antibiotics tomorrow but I don’t know which one yet. I hope she stays with this current batch which have done a good job on reducing both the swelling and the pain. I spent the evening working on mail more or less taking my time and resting long enough ( I hoped ) so that the fan didn’t start sounding asthmatic again. At 10.30 pm though I was able to start the blog as the mail boxes were empty at that point. I should be able to manage a good read before sleep tonight. I wanted to work on tomorrow’s emails as well so games night wouldn’t leave such a backlog but the computer wouldn’t let me.

Wednesday.

I got to bed early and I got my good read. I even got to turn my light out before 1.00 am, I was nice and relaxed. What I wasn’t expecting was to be awake at 3.17 am and getting up for work.Well, officially it was getting up to pee first and work second but you know what I mean. In some instances I was answering emails just after they’d been written. I was late evening in America and early afternoon in Australia. Just one message from my self appointed astrologer but as usual heavy denominations must cross her palm to be divulged. If anyone has any free predictions out there I’d be happy to hear from them.                                                                          I worked till just gone 6.00 am then went to take the morning antibiotic. As soon as the kitchen light went on I could see the activity in the tank. My newbies were doing a lot of moving around and the others must think they’re missing something and joined in. I swallowed the tablet with some difficulty and turned to put the tank light on.  There was a slight pause in the proceedings and then the dance went on as before. I put some flake in and then some pellets, everyone headed for the bottom including Morecambe and Wise who should have been gobbling the flake. A quick headcount showed just two bodies missing, one of the new synodontis and the large plec. Eventually I saw the small synodontis under the bridge no doubt biding his time, the king of camouflage I found draped over the top of the sunken ship as though he’d been carved there.

I took the rest of the meds and made a coffee to take back with me but decided to drink it in the lounge. I saw the time at 6.45 am then saw nothing else till 7.55 am.  I think I was drugged h’occifer. I got dressed and started back to work.  At 9.30 am I made a visit to Pauline’s for bread and a couple of other things, when I got back there was a message on my phone to call the surgery. I let Yvonne know but I’d forgotten it was Wednesday and she’d be at work at that time. Anyway she phoned in her break and let me know I needn’t panic. It was just a call about my prescription for more antibiotics going down to the chemist. Exactly the same information as she’d got from them yesterday. The woman was really snotty when Yvonne told them she knew. As though it was her fault.                                                                                      I broke off at 11.00 am to have a rest and to be ready for lunchtime. For some strange reason I started to watch Judge Judy. The woman fascinated me. She’s like an obnoxious doberman, forever barking and ready to bite. I was glad when I had to leave to make lunch which I ate watching Murder she Wrote. I returned to work at 1.00 pm and had to work hard to catch up again before sneaking off for 2.15 pm to 3.00 pm for another Father Brown. After that it was work again though the world had been quite generous in my time of and the work was easily managed. At 4.30 am I broke off ready for my Antique Road Trip and for my influx of visitors.  Five minutes into the programme the door opened and Lee appeared and handed me a belated birthday card. I got him his usual drink of water and then caught up on all his news as I’ve not seen him since just before Christmas.

He’s preparing a room at home for the baby. I remembered to give him a little picture frame I’d bought for a baby scan. I’m thrilled for him as he’ll be a great dad. It was about 5.25 pm when the door went again and Dil and Matt came in also carrying belated cards for me. Really nice brother and uncle cards. I’ve taken the others down and my balloon has been removed from the room. I made drinks while they chatted and answered question on the quiz that was on. As soon as it finished Dil erected the table and we got the new game out I’d got at Christmas which Lee hasn’t seen, Cards Against Humanity, a party game for horrible people. Lee laughs easily and has a very infectious laugh. There was a lot of laughter during the game, some shocks too. We played twice. I won the first one and Dil the second. Then it was nomination whist where my evil side came out a bit. I wasn’t just concentrating on my call as usual, I was concentrating on making sure others didn’t get theirs. It was a runaway success for me though I’m not sure how safe it will be to eat or drink anything in the house from now on after the threats that were made. Lee made his exit then which was just as well as I was running out of biscuits. Dil dealt a hand of crazy 8’s for us. It started well when I won the first hand but once Dil pointed out my zero score things went rapidly downhill. Fortunately I managed to get Matt to catch for a few big pick ups so he lost the game before they caught me too badly. Dil won so maybe he’ll undo the curse he put on me. I wish he’d stop doing that as it’s a beggar to get the cockerel’s blood off the floor.

After they’d gone I had a tidy up then made myself a sandwich so I could take my second set of foodie pills today. I also took my usual evening meds and my 10.00 pm antibiotic. I came through ere and found a lot of mail. I worked till 11.00 pm on it but then had to start the blog I’m looking at a 12.15 am finish tonight and I’ll finish the rest of the mail tomorrow.

I’m guilty of making assumptions. For years I thought this was a black singer. Seeing him tonight, the voice just doesn’t fit. Still good though.

Thursday.

On the slope down to sleep last night I remember saying ” None of your silly 3.17’s and 3.23’s this morning please” and I’m still not sure if I was talking to my subconscious or to Somnos.  In any event, whichever one it was has obliged me. However. let me just state categorically, they have a warped sense of humour. It was a 3.24 am day. What a lie-in that was. There was no time to be bitter though as there was a loo to be visited , a bank to be checked and mail to be answered. Oh Joy! Having visited the loo and found the traffic lights without the amber so I kept going from stop to start to stop to start to stop, I came back and powered up the computer. First job as very Thursday, to make sure my money has reached the bank. Everything was OK and I logged out of there and into my main mail box. There were quite a few emails but nothing I couldn’t handle. A quick glance told me I wasn’t going to be ripped off by anyone, made rich by anyone or being told which lottery numbers to play in a fortnight if I pay someone now more than I’ll win then. It was mainly straight post on people’s blogs and they were fine.

I’d caught up on the first batch by 4.50 am so had a few minutes on ebay looking for a cross of St Lazarus, mine was half-inched during the burglary. I can find Templar crosses aplenty in red but nothing in green. The computer started to wheeze again and as I’m bound to be responsible for it’s asthmatic ways I decided to give it a rest. Going through to the kitchen I put the main light on and took my antibiotic even though it was almost an hour early. The light had my piscine pals in a tizzy.Was it daylight or not? I thought, why not, and turned the tank light on. I swear some of them did a waggle dance. Morecambe and Wise both rushed to the corner next to me ass I started to wish them all good morning. Morecambe always seems very please to hear my voice.I must be like the Beach Boys and give off Good Vibrations. My two beautiful new catfish were running up and down the tank which is still strange to see as the others stick to the bottom of the tank. The two little synodontis came out of their shell (literally) to see if breakfast was served, Sharkey was prowling the food service area and both Big Al and Little Al seemed to be waiting for the starter to fire his gun. The plecs were just the plecs,  uninvolved with anything unless it suited them. I open the food flap and dropped in some flake and some pellets. They acted like magnets, pulling in everyone to seek their little portion of food. Just like humans there was no co-operation and no sharing. First come first served. The plecs are clever. they just lie on top of what they find till everyone else goes away.

I couldn’t help but smile as I turned away to take the rest of my morning stash and then make myself a coffee to take back. First I needed to replenish the stand for my pods. I was really lucky with that as the stands you buy specifically for the pods are quite expensive but someone had bought me a revolving spice rack and not being fond of spicy foods I’d utilized it for the pods. It holds four different types ( 1 tea & 3 coffee) and happily takes 12 in each row if needed. I’m quite pleased with the result.

I took my coffee back to the bedroom and started work again. That lasted until almost 7.00 am. Since I didn’t fancy another ebay session or any time on the family tree  I thought it was a good time to sit in the lounge and try for 40 winks. In order to aid the dropping off process I turned the TV onto a channel that caries US comedy shows like King of New York and Frazier. Big mistake, I started watching and couldn’t get off. At 8.30 am I went back through to get dressed. I spent n hour catching p with the latest batch then went to Paulines to get new lottery tickets and a packet of bacon. Mike may come today and he might be peckish. I was back inside by 10.00 am and in the short time I’d been out there were 3 messages on the phone. What usually happens is, if like yesterday the call is important I text Yvonne and get her to ring for me. Today two calls were from PPI firms and one was about new central heating boilers through a Government scheme. All the most irritating, annoying calls it’s possible to get as these are pre-recorded calls and for all I know on a continuous loop somewhere as rarely a day goes past without one. It’s as though they don’t think we’re capable of getting in touch just as easily after the first annoying call. I have a new boiler but it doesn’t stop the calls coming through. It’ s harassment.

Lunchtime was noon so I knocked off at 11.45 am to allow cooking times and pill taking time. While waiting I watched Judge Judy for a couple of minutes. I’m sure she’s been in for a charm bypass. If it demoralises you so much that you have to scream like  a harpy at the fools who appear before you I’d say you’ve been in the job too long. The ‘Bing’ came in time for me to watch Murder She Wrote again and blow me down I fell asleep before the end. To be fair I wasn’t out for long so at 1.15 pm I started back towards the bedroom. A knock on the door pulled me up and I did consider not answering in case it was a stranger, but it was my friend from the chemist with the new prescription of antibiotics. I had her wait a moment while I got a box of sweets in tanks and then continued to the computer where I worked til 2.15 pm. The formula was the same today, some Father Brown, work from 3.00 pm to 4.30 pm then a gap for The Antique Road Trip. At just before 4.00 pm I had a message from Mike to say he was on his way. After the Road Trip I nipped back in to do a little work so it would be easier to sit with Mike when he arrived . He got there just about when I’d expected at 5.55 pm by which time I’d gone back through to put the kettle on. I poured his drink and we sat down with Eggheads. As that was over I turned to a Big Bang Theory which as it happened Mike hadn’t seen before. That was a bonus.

Tonight there was a new episode of Big Bang Theory on at 8.30 pm and then a new programme that looked funny at 9.00 pm. In order to watch those, I had to leave Mike to is own devices at 7.00 pm. I thought it was worth trying as I could always do the blog later and leave any overflow of mail until tomorrow. I enjoyed the change and didn’t even rush through in a panic once the programme was over. I’ve been taking my time with this but I’m going to have a quick peep at the mail anyway before bed.

Friday.

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The above appeal was brought to you on behalf of David whose sense of humour is rapidly diminishing. 3.22 am is still not funny Somnos ! I’m spreading the word, what more d’you want? It’s not even two and a half hours sleep at a time. And yes, I could turn my light out and go to sleep earlier and what do you do? You adjust the clock and get me up earlier. I swear blind you’ve got me up ten minutes before I’ve even got to bed before now. Having said all that, I’d no idea what kind of work load was waiting for me this morning and being Friday it’s drug top-up day. So maybe this once you did me a favour by accident. No,  you didn’t. The mail when I got to it after the loo trip in the dark so as not to disturb Mike, was quite manageable. I’d rattled the first load off by 4.30 am. I thought about trying to get back to sleep but I was fully charged now. I had a small catalogue nearby that had come in the post recently which wasn’t opened so I had a quick flick through that. It wasn’t near enough to Christmas to warrant starting my shopping yet ( only about 50 weeks to go) so it was only a cursory glance. At 5.00 am I decided to give the fish a treat and go and have a chat.

I turned the kitchen light on and even then sensed a lot of movement so went straight to the tank.  It was like the Butterfly Ball. Even in the semi dark everyone seemed to be wearing their finery and such grace I saw. There seemed to be waltzes, pavanes and partnered cotillions and movement which seemed to be free of structure yet worked beautifully except maybe or Big Al who seemed to have two left fins. Astounded, I switched the tank light on. Oh why didn’t you stop me? The movement continued but now there was no beauty in it, just a series of random swims which bore no relationship to anyone else’s.They remained pretty in my eyes but all co-ordination and co-operation was gone. I wished “Good Morning ” to them all but neither Morecambe nor Wise came to listen to me. I sat on my haunches to tell them all how beautiful they were (even Big Al and Little Al, albinos both) but seemingly could not attract their attention. I’m guessing I was a party pooper and paying for it with another trip to Coventry.

I was on my haunches still and found I couldn’t stand and also here was pain in my heel in that position. Even getting a grip on the work surface didn’t help. I daren’t call Mike in the ‘middle of the bloody night’ to use his term so I had no choice but to drop to the floor. Ouch, turn over onto my stomach and get to my knees and thence to my feet that way. I felt a right lemon I tell you. There may have been sniggers from the tank but I didn’t hear them. Once on my feet I dropped food in for them and watched them scrabble for it. The two nearly cream flashes that are the Al”s, the cream and raspberry of Sharkey, the almost dark brown camouflage of the plecs, the leopard markings of the new corys and the beaautiful almost dalmation markings on an almost see through background of the hoplos and of course the  beautiful red and blue of the two Siamese fighters was quite a sight as they all chased the food but I wished I hadn’t turned the light on at all so early.

I was feeling quite dejected at my stupidity as I turned away from the tank and poured myself a drink of milk to take my meds with. Despite it being only 5.30 am and me being a creature of some habit I didn’t care and took everything I was supposed to including the new antibiotics. Before making myself a drink I got my meds drawer out and started refilling the pillbox. I had to refill the drawer too with some of the new drugs delivered on Tuesday. It took me a half hour to finish that then I put the drawer back and made my drink. Time to go back to work. By 8.15 am I was in the clear again, or I was if I didn’t refresh. I decided on a break and went to the lounge where I turned TV on for company. It was Frazier time. I must admit to quite liking that show. As it came to an end just before 9.00 am I put the kettle on and prepared Mike’s mug. At the same time I girded my loins for what could be a long job. Surprisingly it wasn’t. I took the drink though and loudly told him it was coffee time which got a grunt. I then told him it was on the bedside table which forced another grunt, hopefully opening his eyes. Then I left him to it and went to work. It was approaching the ten minute mark when his clock would normally repeat that I readied myself to go through. Instead, I heard movement, and moments later I heard him go in the lounge. I finished the last of the mail I was doing and joined him.

What a stupid mistake to make. I try to get Mike up at 9.00 am to leave at 10.00 am to arrive at his Dad’s about 11.00 am. In the lounge I put the TV on to cover the lack of conversation until he’s awake. But he became interested in it instead and stayed in his pyjamas until it was over at 10.00 am. Now I feel guilty he had such a late start. When he left the house I went out at the same time to post some letters and then to pick up 2 pints of milk and some bread from Pauline’s. I’d forgotten to take my bag out with me and had to buy a carrier bag. Still, it’s a donation to charity. I put the shopping away when I got home then started a catch up session until lunch time. All the time I was making lunch I was waiting for a knock on the door until I remembered the warden had told me she wouldn’t be coming today. Great, I had my lunch watching Jessica Fletcher show she was brighter than any Police Detective, with my shoes and socks off, toes wiggling with glee.

At 1.00 pm I returned to work and tried hard to concentrate on the job in hand. Trouble was I kept zoning out. As I came back I’d no idea whether I’d done anything to what was on screen  or not. I didn’t have time to mess about and have a sleep as I wanted to break at 2.15 pm anyway. I did stop work at that time and thought maybe I should use the time to sleep but no matter how I tried I couldn’t. At 3.00 pm it was back to work an I encountered the same problem as before, I was not getting enough done. At 4.30 pm I contemplated staying where I was but realistically that ridiculous thought stayed with me for about ten seconds. I wasn’t going to miss my Antique Road Trip for anything. But, when that finished at 5.15 pm and Mike still wasn’t back, I went back to the computer for an hour. I saw the end of a quiz show when I came back through then turned off the TV at 6.30 pm and went for a shower. Before I got in the shower I made sure the front door was locked. I hadn’t heard from Mike and if he set off it would take him an hour. If he got back before then well, he has his own key or access to the emergency one outside. As it happened when I got out of the shower he still wasn’t back. I unlocked the door on the way back to my bedroom to brush my hair. The next thing I know is what looks like Quasimodo is having a go at my front door lock. I opened the door to find Mike hunched over at the lock trying to find the hole for his key. I asked him  why he didn’t just try the handle as the door was open. He looked sheepish which was an improvement on the Quasimodo impression.

At 7.00 pm I watched a different Road Trip which unfortunately still had the same ‘character’ in. Unfortunately and astoundingly he won again too. Both Mike and I were hungry so I made bacon sandwiches for a late tea. After washing up, I watched Mastermind while Mike disappeared to his bedroom to watch his beloved Man United playing a match. When I came through to my bedroom at 8.30 pm he was able to move back into the lounge so he could make out the players on the big TV. I’ve been here ever since as Sod’s law says the post will start to pour in  the minute I’m occupied elsewhere. That’s why Saturday’s are always bad.

Saturday.

I turned off my light at about 12.45 am  but despite being tired my brain was on overtime (unpaid) rates and wouldn’t let me sleep. 1.25 am was the last time I remember seeing so I assume I fell asleep soon after that. Somnos must have been feeling particularly beneficent  as I was allowed to stay in bed until 3.31 am this morning. I know what you’re going to say, just wasting my life lazing it away like this but be fair, my current employer (slave owner) doesn’t seem to be paying much of a salary for work done. My oh my. you are pernickity today, I admit that maybe I’ve been a little lax on the promotion of Somnos et al but I haven’t had much to work with except veiled threats and not so veiled threats so far. Not a single lottery win. OK, OK, no need to be so anally retentive, Yes, there was £25 but that’s hardly life changing. Anyway, who’s side are you on?

I paid my visit to the loo being sure to creep past Mike’s room . On my way out I heard him speak and moved closer to his door in case he was awake. I bumped into the large glass candle stand MuJo got me for Christmas which made a heck of a clatter. Not a peep from him. So much for being ready for more burglars. It did remind me to try putting the light on in future though. I came back and signed in to the computer and then my main mail box. One tiny mistype and they pounced asking for mobile number and address of any other mailbox in case I ever forgot my password. Like I need flooding with more adverts from new directions. I was in and found not too many messages, especially from last night as I’d worked until midnight almost. I have a friend and fabulous author on a research ( oh yeah!) holiday in the Hawaiian Islands at the moment who wrote an interesting post I enjoyed ( http://theobsidianmirror.net/). I spent some time reading and commenting on that before carrying on with the normal mail. I was done by 5.50 am and didn’t think the fish would mind an early start.

I turned on just the kitchen light so I could enjoy their movements before turning the tank light on. If I do  get another tank, I’m transferring all my friends to the lounge as they’re quite fascinating and relaxing.  Maybe I won’t need the TV at all then except when Mike needs football of course. Once the tank was lit up I saw they were all preparing themselves for food. Strictly speaking, today is diet day but I couldn’t do it to them. What was nice once the food was in was seeing the two newest corys , sorry synodontis , ( see Sunday 4th for picture ) come out to play. They really are stunning. Of course the new hoplo catfish are stunning too. I’m looking forward to the day they are bigger and can be named and recognised by their individual markings. They probably are distinctive at the moment but they refuse to pose side by side till I check. Sometimes I think maybe I’m seeing the same one time after time and the other one has escaped.

I took the antibiotic and all the other drugs then made myself a coffee. Once I’d taken it through I got dressed ready for taking the rubbish out. It wasn’t raining but I could see it was cold outside so I put on a thick jumper. Once the stuff was gathered together I took it to the end of the path an came back in shivering. It was 6.50 am so I went to prepare Mike’s mug and couldn’t help wonder what kind of a morning it would be with him. It turned out to be a 3A 2C day.

1A, His first alarm which rang for quite a while ignored before he finally turned it off.                                                                                                                                                                 1C  The first call from me. “Coffee’s up bro, don’t let it go cold.”  Got something like an “OK righto.”                                                                                                                                       2A  The second alarm goes off . A single curse followed by turning it off.                                                                                                                                                                                           2C  The second call from me. “Don’t forget your coffee, its going cold.”  Not sure what this elicited but there was a blue cloud above the bed.                                                 3A  The third alarm goes off. Definitely not a happy bunny now , says something about ‘Luck’ and sits up to get his coffee. He takes it through to the lounge  to look daggers at me ( or throw them, not sure which) but being sensible I’m still in my room working on mail. I did go through and in passing scratched the top of his head. This at least served to stop him growling. We chatted for a few minutes until his answers were more than one word long then I left him to it while I went to get a pair of shoes on. I was wearing grey slacks today so it was black shoes. I managed to get my right one on without too much of an effort today. Magic ! I heard Mike make a move for the bathroom and then his bedroom so I knew he was getting dressed. We left the house at 7.50 am.

At the Supermarket Mike went for a trolley as I raided the cash point.then we met for a cigarette before going inside. The first point of call was the flowers.Most of last week’s had survived quite well so I chose a small bunch of carnations to replace and  dead flowers and add some nice colour to the vase. Mike’s the one who usually arranges Ju’s flowers and he didn’t disagree with my choice. There seems to be less choice than usual and prices are certainly high at the moment which I can understand in Winter. We moved round to the sale aisle where I bought Reuben some Fireman Sam cutlery but nothing else caught my eye today. We moed round to the gent clothes and I saw some jeans being reduced. When I stopped to look the member of staff told me they were for next weeks sale, not today- DAMN! But when Mike asked, the sale starts Thursday so maybe I stand a chance yet. We did eventually hit the food section where I bought some basic ready meals and some sliced beef, yoghurts, cakes and lime and lemon drinks. Then came the staples like bread, milk and some chocolates for our friends as well as a birthday cake  (Y ddraig goch ) to take to the Ivy. We went through the till and while I went for cigarettes, Mike went to order the coffees. I decided to have an iced one today so Mike was looking forward to me getting brain freeze.

There were no detours today so we went straight to Flint. I was hoping to buy a box of birthday cards so I went round Home Bargains, no joy. In B & M Bargains I had no luck either. Mike’s ghast was flabbered when I bought nothing in either place. We lit cigarettes and walked in the direction of Temptations. Before we went in I took a chance on one last shop and actually found their very last box. Not the best cards in the World but great to have in an emergency. We went into Temptations with a box of chocolates for them. I ordered the drinks and a teasted toecake for Mike even though we were just an hour away from lunch. It was quite busy but Mike did manage a session of double entendres with Ceri nonetheless. After his teacake he ate two of the little biscotti we get with the drinks and then four of the coffee biscuits you sometimes get that he had stored in his coat. We threw kisses over the heads of the queue at the counter to wishthem goodbye once we’d done.

We reached the Ivy around 12.30 pm and had a cigarette as we wandered round to the side door to take them by surprise. We would have done had there been anyone there on the counted but it was we who were surprised . Rob appeared carrying plates from the front of the cafe then Angie and Shirley appeared from the direction of the loos thus proving that women always go in twos. Tariq just appeared. I handed  over the chocolates and the cake to him saying we wanted the staff to have cake with us. Mike pointed out to me the woman who was there last week whose mother told us she shared my birthday ( mine because I’m the oldest by far). Rob did the drinks and brought them over. Tariq followed him and brought me a card, a saucy mug and a fantastic framed picture of Reuben and I together done more like a painting, from all the staff. I was quite choked and for once Mike didn’t have his hands round my throat.  We ordered lunch and I took my tablet then went out for a smoke. I was eating healthily today, a baked potato with beans, coleslaw and side salad. Mike had a roast pork dinner. Once we’d finished, Tariq brought the cake to me to cut despite my shaking hands, I cut it into 8 pieces. I asked Mike to take one to my birthday twin, he and I had one each and the other five went to the staff. Fair play, it was quite nice cake. Shella came out to thank me, Tariq came out wiping his mouth. My birthday twin came over to say she’d enjoyed it.

I paid the bill and we started to leave. Somehow the subject between Mike and I got back to fish when I laughed and said I knew he’d want two of the hoplo catfish once he’d seen them. Tariq who’d walked us to the door chimed in to say that he was thinking of having a tank there and maybe Rob ( who apparently knows about fish) might breed and sell them in which case he’d need more than just one tank. He was prepared for that but at the moment nothing was definite. We hugged goodbye again and I think Mike may want to visit the fish shop tomorrow. We drove home and as it was 2.30 pm by now I took my next antibiotic. After putting the shopping away I set to work. It was very difficult as I was fighting to stay awake after eating. I didn’t get as much done as I thought. Mike came through about 4.00 pm freshly shaved as he was going off to meet a lady friend in Llandudno for the evening. I told him he must be in bed by midnight……………. or come home.

At 5.20 pm I went through to watch the programme Mike and I usually watch but suddenly my eyelids were in the way. They stayed there until 7.35 pm. I quickly had some toast to get the second food tablets out of the way then came back to work. I’ve been here ever since trying to catch up on the day’s work. Mike came home at 11.00 pm and told me all about his evening. He talked about next weekend when he’ll be needed at his Dad’s 9.30 am Friday and at 8.30 am Saturday though he intends to stay here. Then he hit me about the head for laughing at him being up in time to travel an hour to get there knowing how I struggle to get him out of his pit already. He reminded me he’s in Poland for a week next month and Canada for 3 weeks the end of March. I shall be deserted like a golf widow and left to my own devices again. That means I can get into as much trouble as I like.

Well, it’s now gone midnight and I need to go back to my mail to finish as much as I can. Thanks for being with me. Have a Wonderful New Week.  Huge Hugs

 

The Swineherd & The Christmas List

Sunday 30.11.2014

Me. Wha! Where the hell am I?

Swineherd. Er, I’m not quite sure but we call it home my child.

Me. My child? You’re one of those godlings aren’t you. Couldn’t you do better than swineherd? Which one are you then?

Swineherd. I’m Porcinus and I don’t just have pigs, they gave me goats too. A little respect please.

Me. Hm, let’s see. It’s 5.01 am on a Sunday morning. I’m standing here in my dressing gown with a frost underfoot which is slowly spreading up my legs and you’re talking RESPECT. Why am I here and where’s that comedian Somnos?

Swineherd. I brought you here because I knew you’d want to thank us in person for the lie-in we allowed you today. Please don’t pet the pigs by the way, there was an unfortunate incident last week with a hand.

Me. Wha! Why didn’t you say that at the beginning?  I repeat, why am I here and where’s Somnos?

Swineherd. Well. They seemed to be relaxing you and I didn’t want to make you nervous. As to why you’re here, isn’t the fact you’ve been blessed by my presence enough?

Me. Listen sunbeam. In about three inches that frost will hit a point where I’ll start getting very defensive. Kicking your butt down this mountain might just warm me up a bit.

Swineherd. Well, no need to get uppity. Listen, you’re pretty good with the advertising, product recognition and putting a positive spin on things we thought you might like the job as our publicist. Carries a certain kudos, Publicist to the Gods don’t you think?

I woke up at that point feeling a decided chill in my nether regions and shivering. It was 5.01 am. Despite the frost there was still some fluid in circulation and I needed to get rid of it. Somehow I found myself already in my dressing gown so I just slipped on my slippers and made a dash for the bathroom. When I’d chiseled the icicles off and sighed with relief I came back to turn the computer on and deal with the mail. I have to say that things seemed to be working at a reasonable speed this morning but the fan sounds very loud. I hope that’s not on it’s way out.

There was a fair bit of post including some real cons today. In some cases they’re getting very clever and looking much slicker. Almost believable. You know something smells wrong but can’t tell what at first glance. It comes down to minute scrutiny to find spelling mistakes that shouldn’t be there to show you the problem. I’m not even sure it isn’t the gods trying to get information to copy me on twitter. Certainly the one that appeared to be from paypal was interested in twitter  and facebook accounts and asked for passwords. Yes, like I’m going to allow Somnos to call an 8 foot Amazon ‘Butch’ in my name. I’ve become quite fond of my kneecaps over the years.

At 7.00 am I stopped for long enough to feed the fish, mission accomplished without incident., take my morning meds and make myself a coffee. I carried on. I was quite shocked when Mike’s alarm went off at 8.00 am but not in the least shocked he turned it off straight away and carried on sleeping. I hope he remembers to reset the alarm when he gets home r the grandchildren are going to find themselves late to school on Monday. At 9.10 am I’d got up to date on both accounts and went through to the lounge to find Mike appearing as well. He did stop long enough to pick me up. I hadn’t broken anything so was able to make his coffee.He was not on top form this morning,coughing and short of breath ( not as short as I wanted to make him though). I asked why he either didn’t go back to bed or went home and went to bed. He said he’s rather stay on and annoy me, help me out.

We were due to meet up with the girls and with Ugo, Yvonne and Reuben at 12.30 pm to meet Jo’s boyfriend- another Mike but I don’t know if that’s a bad omen. There was time first to nip to Prestatyn and then Rhyl. We got dressed and set off. Naturally we waved at The Ivy as we went past and were soon in Prestatyn where we had a coffee while waiting for the shop we wanted to open at 10.30 am. As soon as it did we grabbed 4 boxes of Whitaker’s strawberry creams in dark chocolate. These are for Christmas but might last me till Friday with luck. Then on to Rhyl. I’d had an online offer for a Fisher-Price toy I wanted for Reuben and wanted to see if the shop had it. They didn’t, but I did find what I thought was a good alternative and we both had a good look round.We soon found it was time to leave.

The drive from Rhyl to St Asaph and the Plough is only about 20 minutes unless of course you’re a jet pilot. It doesn’t seem to have sunk in with Mike that he isn’t so all the laws of time. space and gravity pull over to the side of the road and let him pass. When we arrived we still had time for a cigarette before going in and still managed to be ten minutes early. Yvonne called us. She, Ugo and Reuben had arrived a few minutes before hand and found our table. We were able to get hello hugs from everyone. Reuben was in a god mood judging by the smile. The others arrived and introductions were made and we all sat down. Reuben then decided he was no longer happy. Jo and I went to the bar for drinks. The waitress took the order and said she’d deliver them so I took Reuben for a walk. Mike 1 and Jo followed to have a cigarette and I had one as I walked Reuben round the building, He stood on the windowsill to wave at his Ma, Pa and Auntie Karen inside before we resumed our walk. It was still cool out so we were glad to get back inside to the warm. I abandoned my grandson in favour of a menu and a few minutes later the waitress came to take our order. I have vests longer than her dress and I knew Mike 1 was wondering if he could have melons as a starter.( No, was the answer to that). I took my pre-lunch tablet.

Mike 2 was at the furthest end of the table away from me. I don’t know if that was on purpose so the patriarch couldn’t ask questions or not. He did seem a pleasant enough lad. I call him lad yet he has been married before and has 4 daughters ( poor man). I imagine they’re all quite young but it’s none of my beeswax. My niece Jo can make her own decisions and I trust her judgement-ish. I had an extra hug from Karen ( my Carrie-Ann) when I passed her some Marylin Monroe Mugs with chocolate and mallows I’d found. I gave Jo some boxes of chocolate popcorn and chocolate mallows also with Marilyn’s picture on the box. I gave Yvonne a box of chocolates and then she pointed out to all and sundry my lack of sense for doing so as in the same bag I’d passed some slimming patches. I suppose it might seem a little incongruous. When lunch was over we chatted for an age before deciding to ask for the bill. I tried to get my hands on it but Jo had already paid for herself, Karen and Mike 2. I asked for what was left and Yvonne and Mike were thrusting money at me straight away. I was thwarted.

The car park was full of goodbyes. I had a kiss and hug from Reuben but as soon as Yvonne said “Wave bye-bye to Pops”he burst into tears and I had to go back towards him. I told Mike it had been nice to meet him and he said “Stop playing silly buggers and get in the car.” We drove home. Mike left pretty soon after we’d got back and as usual I started work straight away. It was a couple of hours down the line I had a text from Mike. I thought he was home but it seems he’d had a slight lapse of memory at the garage and thought it was his old car. He’d put petrol in a diesel engine. Not only would it cost him £300 to sort but he had to wait for the privilege. I really felt for him, not well and that happening. Ouch.

Group shot.

Stolen Hat

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Monday.

Me. What again? I thought we cleared up your little invitation yesterday. Nice goats by the way, lost any hands with them lately?

Porcinus. As a Capricorn I thought the goats were a nice touch for you. No, no hands missing though they are a bit partial to….clothing. Oops, I did try to warn you.

Me. Isn’t there some kind of insurance in place for here. Just what do you want anyway?

Porcinus. Now now, it’s only a little hole and look how contentedly he’s chewing. Actually the reason I asked you here is because I can’t seem to get hold of Somnos and wondered if you’d seen him.

Me. Look pal, it’s 5.24 am and pretty nippy, especially with a hole in my lounge pants. Isn’t it possible to ask these stupid questions at a more reasonable hour? Anyway, I thought that you and Somnos might be one and the same.

Porcinus. It’s a more reasonable hour than the one you complained about  yesterday. And no, we’re not the same. I suppose you could say he’s my brother.

Me. Oh, he ain’t heavy then? A reasonable hour is one in which I choose to visit you.

Porcinus. He ain’t heavy? What kind of language is that for a writer ? As to your latter point, you wouldn’t choose to would you?

Me. No, but that’s beside the point. At least I’d be choosing not to visit you at a reasonable hour. But, to get back to your point, I haven’t seen and nor do I wish to see your brother. He’s probably sleeping it off with Dionysus somewhere or gambling away some more of my sleep with another one of you gods. Now if you don’t mind, I was in the middle of a rather interesting dream involving a feather boa and a very naughty lady ( I hope ), perhaps you could return me to it.

I woke up at 5.24 am with the vague recollection of a goat, and why was I playing with a piece of string in my hands? It was like my birthday waking up this late but somehow I still felt cheated like I’d missed out on something important. Damn, I found a tear in the leg of my pants. I need to get these toenails cut again when I can find some industrial shears. Message to self… Turn the heating up, these mornings are getting colder.

After a visit to the loo I turned the computer on all fingers crossed and waited to see how things would be this morning. As regards the mail, things seemed not too bad. Regarding the computer itself, things started well but the fan was still noisy and as the day progressed things got a little slower. But first thing, all was hunky dory. The mail contained a spate of make a fortune working from home adverts which were annoying because you couldn’t see what they were until they were opened but at least they weren’t damaging. The nasty b*stards must have been out again last night though as Windows Defender had picked up two messages it had to remove a virus from. At least I didn’t need to open those at all. I was able to work my way through the rest without too many problems. As usual I stopped at 7.00 am to feed the fish. As I turned the light on all activity seemed to cease for the moment. It struck me as humorous wondering what went through the minds of these characters when the light suddenly appears followed by something gigantic ( only in their eyes before anyone suggests a diet) with a deep voice who issues food from the skies. The inactivity was only momentary though as they quickly resumed their tasks of seeking out escape tunnels or whatever they do. Naturally Big Al was the director of all this activity turning slowly at the centre of the tank while Little Al seemed to scurry backwards and forwards issuing royal commands.At least I was saved his attentions apart from a surreptitious glance he didn’t think I’d noticed. I placed the food in and walked away quite sure he’d issue rations when needed.

I went to take my meds and realised I’d forgotten to take last night’s. Because I’m anal about the box at least looking as though I’d had them, they got tipped into the bin as usual. I don’t have to show how forgetful I am now. I took this morning’s batch and then took a pre foodie, had a cigarette and made myself some toast. It was only because I’d succumbed to temptation and had a couple of chocolates while I was working. I took my coffee back to the bedroom office and started again. Before I knew it time had flown and I almost had a heart attack as Pauline came in at 8.40 am. I asked her how she was and then let her get on with it. The mail was going down well and all banging and clattering had ceased when I suddenly came over peculiar ( I’ve warned you Mike, don’t test me). The pain hit and I had to lie down. That must have been around half nine and the next thing I knew it was 10.25 am and Pauline was just packing up to go. I got up and went through to pay her. No matter how I try I can’t make that sentence sound any better. I returned to work.

11.45 am and both mail boxes were empty though I hadn’t refreshed them for a while. I went through to prepare lunch. As usual I enjoyed Bargain Hunt while I ate. Perhaps because of the enforced nap earlier I stayed awake right to the end. Glancing through the TV magazine I’d found a programme that looked interesting a little later in the afternoon and a fascinating one on the Hittites this evening. I determined I would watch them.  Work was planned around those two programmes even if it meant missing some of the usual ones. In the end I was lucky and I didn’t have to miss too much. At 9.00 pm after the one on the Hittites I came through and started work again and found not too much waiting which pleased me and left me a little more relaxed than usual. I’ve been able to do the blog and will still get an early night.

My Special Girls
Yvonne, Karen & Jo

Tuesday.

Judging by the 3.13 am start this morning it’s possible I may have upset someone. It’s a shame too as I was at the point in a dream where I was about to fill out my list for Santa.

It wouldn’t have been a complicated list. Perhaps a dozen ‘dinky’ Titterton’s pork pies, 10 medium and maybe a family one or perhaps 2. It’s also possible there might have been mention of a BFG and maybe even a lemon meringue just in case Mike is here , he’s got a very sweet tooth. I’d have made a point of telling Santa I’ve tried to be very good this year and any hiccup are generally animal instigated though maybe I shouldn’t mention  that because of his reindeer. I’ve tried to be nice to all Nigerian widows and orphans as well as polite to various bankers based in Nigeria, Burkino Faso and any place else. I’ve also tried hard to be patient with all the women with big, erm, assets who want to marry me or just teach me things and very patient with the various astrologers et al who want me to buy the knowledge of my future, I think being broke is the main  thing in my future if I do. All in all I think I’ve been quite good.  Of course in my dream I would have made the request and sent it off up the chimney to Santa. The min problem with reality is I have central heating in real life and no chimney so send it up.

There was quite a bit of mail when I signed in. It’s like everyone thought, “I know, I’ll do my Christmas list for Santa and then write a letter or post a blog while I’m here.” Not that they weren’t welcome nor interesting. They were, but it’s still a shock sometimes to see them all come at once. Still, thanks to being up so early it’s not like I was short of time. By 6.30 am I was feeling tired but I couldn’t go to sleep again without seeing to the fish so I decided to do them early. I went through to the kitchen and broke the pitch black by turning the overhead light on before turning the light on in the tank. I don’t know if the overhead light had set them off but I was mesmerised at the complicated water ballet being executed before me, and by executed I mean like the electric chair, as Morecambe and Wise were turning circles as though chasing each others magnificent tails while Big Al an Little Al we involved in a race doing full lengths of the tank, hitting their noses on the glass and racing back. Sharkey was nipping in and out of the amphora looking as though he’d lost something. In the midst of all this frenetic activity the plecs were just lying on the bottom without a care in the world. It was as though I’d fed them something a little controversial but I hadn’t fed them at all yet. I did so and things seemed to quiet down a bit. I turned away to take my morning meds and decided I was peckish so took a ‘foodie’ waited the 15 minutes ( with a cigarette) and had a small bowl of Shreddies.

I’d automatically made myself a coffee so no point in going to nod off in my chair and anyway, watching the fish had woken me up again. I went back to work. It must have been well after 9.00 am when I started to nod off over the keyboard when there was a knock on the door. I was expecting 2 deliveries today so I’d psyched myself up to answer the door. Not a delivery, instead there as a little old lady standing there who said “Do you want to buy any potatoes, various size bags”? I stuttered a “No thank you” and came in. No sooner had I sat down than another knock on the door. I could see the bright orange top that led me to think it was the postman so I answered. This time a tall young man with an orange jumper stood there. “Want to buy some potatoes”? he asked. I wasn’t sure if my first answer hadn’t been convincing enough but I repeated it with thanks.  Yet again I went to sit down at the computer when I heard a fumbling at the door. There was the same orange. I wanted to open the door and say go away but I’m glad I couldn’t as it was the postman with delivery number 1.

As this delivery was a gift I’d bought I decided to have a break from work and start organising myself. I got out the sacks I’d bought with Mike a couple of weeks ago and put names on them then placed them on Mike’s bed. I started going through my bags, boxes and parcels and placing things in the appropriate sacks so that when I’m ready I can just grab a sack and start wrapping. I’m not sure Mike is going to be too thrilled when he comes this weekend and can’t find his bed. I must put in some effort as my great niece, her boyfriend and my great grand nephew are coming up this weekend and I have something for them to take back for under their tree. That’s if they have a tree as currently they’re in a hotel after their house was flooded. I know she’s finding it a strain having to control her son when he wants to play which she wouldn’t have to do at home. All this work took me up to almost midday so I stopped for lunch and Bargain Hunt.Remarkably I stayed awake again and then couldn’t afford a nap as the next episode of the programme I’d watched yesterday was on at 2.15 pm and I wanted to see it. That left me just over an hour to make some headway with the post. I actually did quite well.

I quite enjoyed the programme but it’s obvious I’ve missed quite a lot by not seeing earlier episodes even though each one is a story in itself. If it comes around again I’ll make more of an effort. I started working again and at 4.10 pm as I was just nipping to the loo I saw a van draw up and someone coming down the path. I opened the door ready and it was my second delivery which is actually something Ugo wanted me to get.He’ll be pleased it’s here. I had to sign for it and how I hate those awful machines you have to write on with a plastic pen. My signature is indecipherable to me when I’ve use one. I thanked the driver, closed the door and continued on my now urgent journey. By 5.00 pm I was up to date. As I went through to watch a quiz I noticed a box of Christmas cards I’d left out ready to do the neighbours so I rattled a few off as I watched. Then I cut out some pictures to use in Christmas decorations with the lights I bought. A really industrious day. By 7.00 pm I’d seen all I wanted to see on the box so I had a couple of mince pies and came back to work. I’ve been answering mail and commenting on blogs ever since. I really feel like I’ve achieved something today and at last I’m reasonably happy with what I’ve bought.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gwuHtbcvTh8

Wednesday.

Lat night went so well that I was able to go to bed, have a read and still turn my light off at 11.45 pm.  This morning was not the best start possible though. I woke and got up at 3.36 am  and for some reason wandered through to the kitchen after visiting the bathroom and turned the light on. I went straight to the tank and lit it up while wondering if they’d like some Christmas lights. All of them seemed a little stunned and after a short visit to the front of the tank to make sure it was really me, carried on swimming normally. I turned round to take my tablets, putting milk in my mug to do so, then for some strange reason took a pre- foodie tablet first. I realised straight away what I’d done but had no choice but to eat. It was then I checked my watch for the 15 minute delay and found it was just 2.50 am. Stunned but well able to hear the mocking laughter from the top of Mount Olympus, Valhalla or even the roof I lit a cigarette and sat in the darkened lounge to smoke it. When the timing was finished I returned to the kitchen and with a show of manly strength ripped open a small box of Rice Krispies and spent the next 5 minutes collecting as many as possible off the floor before eating some more carefully opened Rice Krispies from my supplies. I made a coffee and took it through to the office.

I turned the computer on and sent birthday greetings to my great-niece Marissa via Facebook, a place I rarely visit these days. While there I accepted two friend requests and answered a message. Before starting on the post I needed to visit the loo again. It was now 3.45 am and obviously still very dark so I turned the bathroom light on. You’ll have to take my word for it that I’m not vain but as you go in the bathroom there is a large mirror on the left. I just happened to glance into it and there I saw Oliver Cromwell. I had a huge wart on my chin.It was only on closer examination I found it was a rogue Rice Krispie poking through my beard. I think the mocking laughter would have been much harder if I’d gone to Pauline’s like that. I ate it, did what I needed to do and returned to work.

I worked through until 8.00 am then got dressed ready to confront the day with what I hoped would be dignity. Taking my empty cup through to the kitchen I was ready to return to work for a while but decided to wrap my daughter’s birthday present and also place the calendars I’d had made into envelopes. once addressed I placed them  in the bag with the gift ready for Ugo to deliver when he goes to see his Mum and his brother and sisters. That job had taken me beyond 9.00 am so it was opportunity to go to Pauline’s for some extra milk and my TV mag. Obviously the milk goes faster when I’m having cereal for breakfast. I picked up cigarettes for tomorrow while I was there so I needn’t go out again until Friday when I do the lottery. It seemed quite sunny out so I’d gone in just my cardigan ( you know what I mean so stop laughing, no coat). Whatever lies the sunshine told it was white on the ground and I was freezing outside. I was glad to get back.

After storing the milk in the fridge ( probably warmer than outside) I returned to work and concentrated on it for the rest of the morning until 11.45 am when I went to make lunch. I reminded myself to take a pre-food tablet when I reached the kitchen but must have been distracted. I’d put the sausages under the grill and had part cooked them before I started the mashed potatoes and once those were done, the beans. It was only as things were almost ready I remembered the tablet and was able to curse myself for such stupidity. There was no help for it though things were almost done. I added butter to the potatoes, creamed them and added them to my plate. I turned the grill off and added 6 (small) sausages to my plate then retrieved the beans from the microwave and added those over the top of my potatoes like the lava coming from Mt. Vesuvius. I really enjoyed my dinner and made doubly sure to take the after food tablets when finished. After washing up I sat back in the chair to enjoy the auction part of Bargain Hunt and fell asleep. It didn’t last long but I thought it had, Looking at my watch told me it was 2.10 pm and I thought my new programme was on in 5 minutes and I’d done no work.  Common sense kicked in when I realised it was still the news on TV so I rechecked my watch. It was 1.10 pm so I had plenty of time to work.

I started catching up again but found myself drifting off, drifting, drifted. This time it was 3.00 before I opened my eyes. I knew that because my head was bent at such an angle it was looking at my watch on my arm, in my lap.That meant I’d all but missed the programme and also that a load more mail had accrued.  I refreshed the screen  and almost fainted when I saw the new totals. Opening a new tin of Pepsi Max I hoped the caffeine would help keep me awake while I worked. It did, but it made me fidgety and my hands were jerking so that I was deleting mail before I’d done it and had to keep going to find it. At 4.30 pm I decided I needed a break before my opponents visitors arrive. I’d just managed to eat a cold sausage sandwich with some leftovers from lunchtime when Lee arrived. He’s fine and looking good too. What a great father he’s going to make. I asked if Jen is showing yet and his answer is “Not much”. Maybe she isn’t at that sensitive stage yet where her S.O.H takes a holiday if her size is mentioned in the wrong way ( in any way). I suggest he keeps some running shoes handy as he may be taking the dog out a lot. He was good enough to listen to my woes about the computer  and agreed I’d done all I could but he did have a look at the blasted search engine that comes up every day unwanted. I did say I’ve checked all the registries. He wasn’t able to fin it’s hiding place either but it’d not damaging anything now and I just delete it. I got him a glass of water and we sat chatting waiting for the others to arrive.

They caught me unawares at 5.30 pm and I had to nip to the kitchen to make drinks. Coffee for Matt and Tea for Dil. Drinks given I set up the table and pulled out the Balderdash. I didn’t get a look in during the first game and realised what accomplished liars we breed in this family. Hung by our own petards. I think Matt won the first one but in the second one my super powers of straight face, honest eyes came into play and I won easily. Oh, and naturally I was doing the scoring too which helps.I nipped into the kitchen to smoke a cigarette where the extractor fan is since neither Lee nor Dil smoke though Dil used to so he understands the need. While I did so, Matt drew up the chart for nomination whist and Dil dealt. It distresses me to say I wasn’t doing the scoring this time and so I lost. It was nip and tuck between Dil and myself most of the way with us changing position between first and second and leading by about half a dozen points. The last game he made sure I won one trick more than I wanted while he got his call and he beat me. At that point Lee had to leave us as he hadn’t seen Jen since breakfast  Since she works outside the home and has a fair way to travel it can be a long day.

Once Lee had gone Dil suggested reminding Matt how to play Chase the Lady ( what some of you will know as Hearts on your computers). It’s been months since we first showed him and it’s not an easy game to teach. He picked it up quite well but still hasn’t quite got the hang of it. We decided to play it through as though a real game and point out errors on the way. He didn’t seem to be making that many until someone started dumping the Queen of Spades on him at every opportunity after theb two of them stopped me lotting. That turned out to be Dil’s game as well. So, just one very small victory for me tonight, I’m devastated. As it was past 9.30 am it was time for them to depart. I tidied up, washed the pots and wished the fish goodnight. I’d just turned the mail back on when I remembered I needed to go back through and take my meds. There was mail going back to 3.30 pm when I must have last refreshed so I wasn’t best pleased. In order to go to bed by midnight, and I am tired tonight, I have had to leave a big chunk undone until the morning. It’s 11.50 pm now so I should just about make it.

Here is a picture of Mike’s new grandson Jacob Ryan born around 3.00 am this morning. Isn’t he bright eyed. Congratulation Lisa and Tony and the new grandad.

Thursday.

I made it to bed by midnight last night. After a read I settled down at about 1.00 am. After the last couple of days I was delighted when I opened my eyes and found the time was 4.53 am. I think some beings may have decided they’ve gone a bit too far this week. Things were OK as I laid into the mail on my talktalk account which is actually aol. I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it before but it’s odd that there’s no facility for actually blocking an address you don’t want mail from but which keeps bombarding you. I could really have done with it this morning. So many adverts for winning laser eye treatment etc. Nothing interesting like winning your own weight in gold for instance.

7.00 am brought it’s usual torments when I went to feed the fish. I bent down to wish Good Morning to Morecambe  and Wise as they’re the ones usually at the upper level and hang around either because of my dulcet tones or because they want to be fed.  Instead I ended up in a staring contest with two red eyes which had they been able to speak would probably have had a very gruff Yorkshire accent and be calling me ‘lad’ as they gave me a bollocking. The pity of it is I have no idea what I’m supposed to have done wrong unless it’s because their light was turned off 5 minutes early last night. I also had the urge to laugh as Little Al swam into the picture and stayed behind the tail of Big Al and the tail seemed to be slapping his face. Laughing might not have been the best idea so I just said “Sorry” and moved away to take my meds. I needed breakfast this morning so I also took one of my pre-food tabs then lit a cigarette for timing and walked away to make myself useful. First a trip to my bedroom to find my Christmas gift wrap, then to Mike’s bedroom to create a space on top of the bed by taking a sack through ready for wrapping later.

The cigarette came to an end so a couple of pieces of bread went into the toaster and I started to make my coffee. As the toast came out it got lashings of butter and I was licking my lips for ages afterwards. I took my coffee back through with me and got myself washed and dressed before settling down to work again. As soon as 9.30 am came round I prepared to go to Pauline’s, the school rush would be over by then and I wouldn’t be trampled by a herd of wild mummies freed for the day. It was dry this morning with even a hint of sun but again there was no warmth coming through. I was prepared this time though and was so muffled in my coat I could hardly move and the cardie underneath made it look like I’d gained ten stone since the weekend, which in fairness to Whitaker’s dark chocolate mints and strawberry creams I might have. I picked up a small loaf and took it to the counter just as the last customer was leaving. I handed Pauline the list of lottery tickets and requested a winner. She promised to see what she could do. I also bought enough cigarettes to keep me going until Saturday (I hope).

Back at home it took me half an hour to unravel myself from all the extra clothing. It was like unwrapping a mummy from the sixth dynasty, I think that was the last series. I’m not sure what husband Joan Collins was on then. It was back to work after that and my oh my hadn’t it mounted up again. Yet again over the last two days there have been little groups of people following the blog so I’m constantly having to check out new blogs to see if I should be following back. I never quite see the logic of being followed by a travel company or a school supply business. Those are not groups most people would follow. At 12.00 pm I felt really tired and was going to lie down but remembered I needed to eat something so had a beef sandwich and a strawberry fool. I watched most of the antique programme and even saw the auction at the end. I came back through to work as I wanted to see something at 2.15 pm. I was keeping an eye on the clock (( very uncomfortable as it kept rolling off) and remember seeing 2.05 pm and thinking I needed to wind up. That was the last thing I remembered until I woke up at 2.55 pm when it was almost over. I was determined not to miss the Big Bang Theory at 8.00 pm.

About 4.30 ish I got up to date on emails and decided on a break. I cut myself some malt loaf and watched a quiz on TV until 6.00 pm when I decided it would pay me to keep the mail down ready for my next departure. Things went well and at 7.45 pm I was up to date on both accounts . I went through and found I’d forgotten the fish so without turning on the kitchen light crept quietly up to the tank and switched if off shouting “Time for bed guys, goodnight.” I even had time to wrap a couple of Christmas gifts for my great niece, her partner and my great grand nephew. I’d just put the sellotape away when Big Bang started.I settled in my chair, not that this episode was too important as it was a repeat of last weeks before the new one. I got about half way through and fell asleep again. It was almost 9.30 pm before I woke up. I’m beginning to think Somnos and Porcinus might have a new playmate who enjoys messing with my schedule. Let’s call him Digitus just so I know who I’m thumping when we meet.

Wearing my melancholy face and the quivering bottom lip that so upsets my beautiful daughter, I wandered back through to work.  Drying my eyes so the screen wouldn’t blur I set to work on the new messages which were coming in thick and fast, worse than a snow storm in Maine ( as described to me by that excellent writer S.J.Sprague). I was so involved in what I was doing I almost missed Mike coming through the door at 10.40 pm. Obviously like a little child he demanded my attention and if no coffee was forthcoming ( or even fifthcoming) he’d spit his dummy out. The coffee was forthcoming and we sat together talking about our week. Mine didn’t take long, stayed in all week except for the corner shop visits. His of course was much more interesting, in the hatched column his beautiful new grandson Jacob, in the dispatched column 6 of his fish which he was definitely most dischuffed about. His water ( sorry, the tank’s water) has been tested and found to be perfect so it seems likely either he’s bought some diseased fish or introduced something toxic to the tank and he swore he hasn’t sung to them so it must be an airline he put in last week.

We talked until quite late and I’ve now had to give up the idea of doing more emails until tomorrow since it’s well past the witching hour. I therefore wish you all goodnight. Bon nuit, nos da.

Disgruntled                                                                                                                                                       Gruntled?

Serene in the face of danger

Friday.

I read until 1.00 am or maybe a little after. As I turned the light off and settled down I sent out a few warnings mentally about the price of sleep disturbances. I was afraid of being woken at some ridiculous hour with a request to vote for one of my new acquaintances as God of the Week or something equally as urgent. As it was, I had a nuisance free night and was able to lie in until 5.29 am. There was a desperate need for the loo when I swung my legs out so I made a quick dash trying to get my dressing gown on at the same time. That flailing of arms and flapping of material was not what was wanted at that time of day though. Either my are, sleeve or belt must have caught two empty pepsi tins on the edge of my desk waiting to go into the recycling bag. Down they came with a double clang worse than the chime of a grandfather clock in the dead of night. I expected light to go on around me, well everywhere except Mike’s room at least. For sure it made me wake up as I stood there shushing the cans like they could hear me and bounce quietly. I carried on to the loo and then picked them up on my way back. Without any thought I dropped them into the recycling bag only for them to clang again on the cans already in there.

I started in on the mail and my fears that there would be plenty of mail left from last night was proven right. Still, worrying about it wouldn’t help so I just panicked instead. It was, OMG, OMG, OMG what can I do? But I wasn’t sure what could be done except work or sit there and delete them all claiming some kind of divine retribution because I wouldn’t speak to Somnos. I knew that was unlikely to work so I bit the bullet ( don’t do that if you have fillings folks) and got on with it. I could only work until 6.30 am on this first batch as I had my drugs to see to this morning so at the appointed hour I went to the kitchen ready to look my nemesis in the face. It wasn’t to be as he was holding one of his Union meeting again where the tail flicked in my direction sometimes as if in indication. I can’t understand why we can’t get on. I opened the flap and dropped food in. Before I turned away I noticed Sharkey as well as Morecambe and Wise backing away from Big Al while pretending to listen. The food and I were winning hearts and stomachs. I left and went to take my morning meds.

Once the meds were taken and the pots empty I went to get the drawer where I keep my ‘stash’ and filled them all up again. It does take quite a while. Before doing it I”d taken a pre-food tablet knowing I’d be ready for breakfast once the meds were done. As soon as the drawer was back in place I put some bread in the toaster and made my drink. I enjoyed the toast, and after taking my post meal tabs I took the drink back and started on the mail which hadn’t disappeared while I was away. It’s funny sometimes to see just how many people are still working after you’ve gone to bed and seeing them say goodnight at various time zones on twitter. I wasn’t many short of completion of last night work when it was time to leave again. I’d no idea whether Mike has set an alarm last night an I knew he’d had a late night but he had to travel to his father’s this morning and I was determined to give him a head start. So, at 9.00 am I took him a coffee through, went to the lounge, put Frasier on and settled to wait. I woke up again around 9.30 am and Mike was in his chair enjoying the programme. At least I didn’t have to shout him again. Trouble is I expected him to get up and get ready and be out of the house by 10.00 am. No chance, he watched Frasier till 10.00 am and then got ready and left.

I carried on working all morning until there was a knock at the door about 11.45 am. It had slipped my mind about the warden coming and yet again I wasn’t dressed. She must wonder if I ever get dressed. ” You DO go out don’t you”? was one of her questions. It was during this visit I learned I am exactly one day older than she is. While she no doubt sat there thinking she wasn’t as wrecked as the man in front of her, I was thinking, What a difference a day makes. She’s quite a pleasant lady to speak to. After she’d gone I made myself pizza and chips for the sake of speed and watched Bargain Hunt. Yep, all the way to the end again. Then it was time to concentrate , preferably with my eyes open. I rapidly finished off last night stuff and started on this morning’s. by 5.00 I was more or less up to date and took a break. Time for a quiz then I planned to take a shower about 6.30 am and wondered if Mike would be back by then. I watched the quiz until 6.00 pm and then the start of the next one before falling asleep until 6.45 pm. Mike wasn’t back. I dashed ( ha, me dash !) to have a shower so I wouldn’t miss too much of Mastermind, and managed to get back only ten minutes into the programme.

At 7.30 pm there was football on TV so I decided to go and complete a little more work. I wouldn’t have been able to had Mike been here. He arrived back at 8.50 pm so it was time to stop work again and go see how his day had been and to spend some time with him. I stayed until 10.00 pm  having enjoyed Have I Got News For You and it’s lampooning of our lying politicians. Now it was time to be serious again amongst the conmen of a different continent. I was determined to clear as many messages as possible today with going out so early in the morning. I’ll never know why I chose a Saturday as the day I post the blog as it’s always the most stressful day of the week, losing so much time from the computer due to shopping. It’s playing catch up from the moment we get in.

Food Fun 1 -Empty

Food Fun 2

 

Saturday.

Last night I made it to bed before midnight but as usual there was an overriding need to relax with a read. Having stopped writing seems to have increased my appetite for reading rather than dampening it. After quite a few late night this week and just a couple of late mornings I was hoping that maybe I’d get to lie abed until about 5.00 am again. Yes I know, the eternal optimist. It was 3.38 am but on the plus side there were no visits to Mt Olympus/ Snowdon/St Helens or somewhere to contend with first. I got out of bed a bit gingerly as it felt cool. I do keep the heating on and mentioned to Mike that it just never seemed to reach my room. There were a few non swear words in his explanation which seemed to be “Stop putting stuff in front of the radiator then you prannock.” Since he wasn’t up (ha ha ha) I didn’t have to hear that this morning. A quick run to the bathroom, a minute with the ice-axe and then back to start work. Quite a bit to do before 7.00 am but I’m confident it can be done.

I started by deleting everything I could see I didn’t need to work on or answer, just so the list looked smaller. Next it was dealing with the tweets and retweets which made the list smaller still. All that pratting about brought the end of the list much closer for me but gave me so much less time to concentrate on the things that mattered. I panicked. My hands started to shake which was quite good as it almost counteracted the usual shake so I didn’t light the tip of my nose when I had a cigarette. I’mm not sure the medical profession are ready to accept this as a breakthrough but I felt I’d made progress and my nose wasn’t as warm as usual. I actually managed to get up to date, including a refresh, by 6.45 am and went straight through to the kitchen in an unusually good mood. I put the tank light on and it was like a miracle. The food slot became the centre of all attention. Morecambe and Wise at the top of the tank, Sharkey was hovering around low middle and the rest on the gravel more or less in a circle surrounding Big Al so either he was leading the morning prayers or I’d just saved him from a mob. I dropped the flake in for M & W followed by a tablet of algae for the others. M & W ignored the flake and followed the algae tab to the bottom an started kissing it. Since it had dropped fairly close to Big Al, I wouldn’t give twopence for their chances if he saw them. Luckily Little Al was running around like he was demented and was occupying his attention momentarily. That also suited me, so whistling Que sere sera, I backed away to take my meds. I decided to have breakfast today so once the meds were taken I had a timer cigarette before putting some bread in to toast.

I’d just finished breakfast and made a drink when Mike’s alarm went off so I put the kettle on for him and while it was boiling started readying my bins. When I took the drink through I could tell it was going to be hard work. I had to call twice just to get a grunt in return. I took the bins and the bags out and when I’d finished came back in to find no movement even though it was possible the alarm had sounded and been ignored again. I called out “Don’t let your coffee get warm Michael” and went back to work by refreshing the screen.The words must have penetrated because I heard him move through to the lounge which didn’t necessarily mean he was awake.On a Pinterest board I saw a picture of some fish s I went to check if he was awake and asked him to look them up, it was written as batta fish, bata fish and also beta fish and they looked great. Mike came through to say they were just Siamese fighting fish but he had to agree these were spectacular. It turned out they had an odd name like semi circular or something and the tails were brilliant but it said they’re expensive. We’ll have to keep an eye open. OK, so I had him awake now but he was so hooked on the subject that I couldn’t get him to go get dressed.

Eventually we were on our way out but didn’t arrive at the store until 8.15 am.I thought we were able to make up some time as my list wasn’t too big but we had coffee at the normal time. From there we went to Flint and our usual shops for a few items and then our usual coffee and teasted toecakes with Ceri. There didn’t seem to be much banter today but that may be because it was quite crowded. Also I wasn’t on top form at all and wasn’t perhaps paying as much attention as usual. We went home and put the shopping away. Time was getting on and about 1.00 pm we went for lunch. We were disgusted when we ot there to see they’d allowed someone to sit at our table even though the place wan’t full. That will mean a written complaint to the management. Talking of whom, he was in the kitchen cooking today as Shella is off with the flu. Angie and Rob were front and centre today so Rob saw to the drinks and Angie took our food order for Tariq to cook. I decided to give him the letter of complaint after we’ve eaten. By the time we were due to leave we were the only customers left so Tariq and Shirley were able to come through from the kitchen. We had a few laughs as a group then received hugs including from Rob today.

At home I wanted to start work but Mike wasn’t happy with the way I looked. He told me to put a bag over my head to improve things. Swine ! We put some Chistmas lights up at the window and brought my permanent tree of LCD lights out to stand in front of the window. Once I’d hung a few ornaments on it everything felt quite Christmassy. I couldn’t go to Colwyn Bay to take gift to my great niece so I sent a text to David -my nephew-her father. They’ll come through in the morning which is nice. After that, I was able to come through and relax ( away from THE VOICE ” Stop doing that. put your arms down, take your spray) and do some work until 5.30 pm when he called me through to watch TV with him and relax properly. I stayed until 8.00 pm which being blog night is as late as I dared. I’m going to be on time with the blog but I’m not sure where I’ll be with the mails as I think it’s time to hit the sack as soon as I press publish.

Blowing kisses to Pops

And finally.

Just Kidding

Have a wonderful week everyone.