The Cold Descends & Missing Shreddies

Sunday 8th Feb 2015

A new regime is in place- mine! Though I woke up a little earlier this morning I didn’t actually get up until 5.44 am. (No you cheeky beggar, I’m not revolting), I’m in revolt. I want more leisure time, more time to sleep or more specifically, more time asleep. I mean, fair play it’s a Sunday. There’s just a chance Mike might sleep in past 8.00 am. ( yes OK, I’ll be serious a minute, once I stop laughing). I did things in an orderly fashion first thing. Computer on, trip to loo and then back to sign in. Since I don’t have to take the antibiotics now even the fish can have a lie in until natural daylight starts. I got a good hour in on emails and didn’t even dent them. So many new people coming through and liking the blog which is really nice.

At 7.00 am I took a break and went through to the kitchen. I turned both lights on and stood watching the fish play, argue, fight and just chit chat. They’re a funny bunch and quite entertaining.Yesterday I’d put the piece of bog wood in a bucket to soak, this morning I turned it over to catch the pieces that had dried out again. Once the monsters had been fed I took my meds then made my usual coffee to take back. I got dressed then had another session with the mail until I heard Mike get up OF HIS OWN ACCORD at 9.45 am. I went to make him a coffee and make fun of him. I had to come back to finish one message I’d been part way through then I joined him in the lounge. He asked what I fancied doing today and I told him I needed to get a headset for the computer as the last one gave up the ghost but other than that it didn’t matter. That was fine it seems, but the fact he was out of bed didn’t mean there was a chance of any real movement yet. We got to the stage of him making a second coffee so I said I’d come back to work ( I’d only reached 5.30 am at that point) until he was ready. That was 11.45 am so it was coat on and off we went.

Still unsure where to go, we headed for Prestatyn first and had a look round a few shops including the £ shop where I actually found what I wanted along with a great box to hold tinfoil with a cutter on the side that won’t tear. We had another quick look round in case we saw a car coat for Mike but no joy. As it was getting on for 1.00 pm at this stage we decided to eat. Neither of us fancied the pub in Prestatyn and little else seemed open so we decided to visit the Bells of St. Mary’s, it’s been a while since we’ve been there. I know the place is quite close to The Ivy which I love but I admit it was my decision so I could have a roast dinner with a Yorkshire Pudding and my choice of veg and potatoes. It was really enjoyable. By then it was nearly 2.00 pm so instead of looking for fish we decided to com home and put the bog wood in the tank so the fish would have a whole new playground.One thing that was decided , Sharkey would be going on his holidays. He’s a beautiful looking fish and the raspberry tips are a great colour but he’s too aggressive for me and the rest of my fish are community. Mike had agreed to take him since he already has a couple of silver sharks. So, once the bog wood was in place and we’d both watched the fish investigate, Mike upturned the bridge where Sharkey was hiding and we bagged him up for the journey. I carried him out to the car while Mike carried his suitcases ( Mike’s not Sharkey’s). We hugged goodbye and they set off. I started sneezing like mad outside it was cold and I was full of cold. Ugh.

Back inside again with a tissue stuffed up my nose I was shocked to see it was almost 4.00 pm so I thought I’d better assault the mail box again and clear what I could. Another 113 had been added to one and 54 to the other. I did two hours solid then went through to make some tea and turn the tank light off. I watched for a minute enjoying their new adventure playground. After some trifle I carried on till 8.00 pm then went and watched a couple of old Gavin and Stacey’s. At 9.20 pm I called it a night and came for my last go on here.I started making real inroads in it and by 11.00 pm didn’t have too much left. I’ll finish the blog and go back to it for a while to lessen the load for tomorrow. I have jobs to do in the morning.

Monday.

I got to bed at 12.30 am. Still sneezing I hunkered down and turned the light off. The day started again at 3.36 am. This was just a skirmish I lost, not the whole war. I skipped the light fandango, turned cartwheels across the floor ( Thanks Procul Harum) until my bladder would take no more. After an urgent visit to the loo I signed into my emails and got started. It really wasn’t looking too bad on the first account and by 6.30 am I was clear though I hadn’t refreshed. I decided to see to the fish before opening the second account. As the kitchen light went on I could see activity, Pepper seemed to be having fun passing under the bridges formed by the new bog wood, and two of the plecs were attached to it.  I put the tank light on to see them better and noticed almost every fish was doing something that involved the wood except the synodontis who are still the shy boys of the tank. Yesterday Mike stood by the tank hoping to see them but every time one ventured forth his attention was elsewhere, by the time he looked back the fish had gone in again. He did get a wonderful view of their moustaches though, twitching inside the entrance to their shell like whips.

Big Al came over to take a look at me and turned away with his usual disdain. Little Al followed on behind but just seemed to glance at me in puzzlement as though asking what he was supposed to do. I fed them all and turned away to take my meds. I had some breakfast then I took a drink back to my desk and found while I was having fishy fun, the emails had piled up again. I got dressed before dealing with any in case I offended anyone now they were awake. Then I started again. By the time I’d dealt with those and more the second account had packed them into the gunnels too and it was 10.30 am. I finally cleared at 11.40 am and decided to break for lunch. Braised beef, colcanon  mash and some mixed veg, It was very tasty and I enjoyed a Murder She Wrote while I ate.

It was back to work at 1.00 pm but before I started I did a little research on which of the catfish and plecs I like will stay at a maximum of 4 – 6 inches which is all this tank can take. I’ve got it down to a zebra plec which will probably take a mortgage, a pimelodus pictus ( my current No 1), Albino plec,striped clown plec or striped bulldog plec or maybe a medusa plec. Now it would depend on availability and price. I’ve been reading a fair bit about crowd funding recently and decided if I asked everyone in the world to contribute just 1p each to my paypal account I can afford a new tank and perhaps my own house to put it in, oh and enough to bury myself if Big Al gets his own way. Any spare rooms and you’d all be welcome to stay , but not all at the same time please unless I get elastic walls or a very broad mind.       So, back to work. I managed to stay on top of everything during the afternoon and there was little left when I called a halt at 4.30 pm. I only stayed away till 6.00 pm but as I took my tea plate back into the kitchen I found I couldn’t get any hot water. I noticed it was decidedly chilly in the kitchen too so checked the radiator, it was ice cold. I turned the thermostat up but nothing happened. I knew Yvonne was on her way to Birmingham and wouldn’t be able to do anything until she got there. However at 7.30 pm she sent a text to say she’s been in touch with the emergency team and they’d send a plumber out. Good as I was beginning to sound like a demented typewriter in the bedroom.

Pimelodus Pictus catfish grows to about 4.3″ 10.5cm Magnificent whiskers

At 8.30 pm a knock on the door revealed a man with a great big bag of tools. I’d already said what message the machine was displaying so I thought this was bad news. But, he was out in less than 5 minutes. He’d fiddled underneath and it sounded like he’d turned a tap on. He had, and topped up the boiler. Mike bled a radiator yesterday and it seems you have to replace the water used to displace the air. Never heard anything like it. They say nature abhors a vacuum so you’d think the boiler would pull in any water it needs from the feeds. Anyway. I was back up and running and able to wash my pots from teatime. I didn’t see any point in going back through to watch TV so just stayed working. I paused early tonight at about 10.30 pm to get the blog done. I’m hoping for an early night with going out in the morning.

Tuesday.

Last night I got to bed about 11.45 pm and didn’t read for too long, preferring instead to let the warmth help me drift off to sleep. That probably happened not long after 12.30 am. Before I drifted I said a prayer to Porcinus to intercede with his brother not to let me sleep in and miss my bus. I’m guessing Porcinus did the job because Somnos made sure I wouldn’t miss the 7.45 bus by getting me up at 4.22 am. He’s all heart. In a way tough he did do me a favour ( don’t tell him that) by ensuring I had time to clear both my mail accounts before I left.

When I first got up the house was warm so the tinkling in the bathroom wasn’t the sound of icicles falling from my nose. I came back to the bedroom and started up the computer and loaded up one of my mail addresses. There was a fair bit but be fair, it wasn’t like I was short of time. I worked until 6.00 am then went to feed the fish. They actually seem happier now the ice on the tank has defrosted and they can move again. They were in fine form this morning and I actually saw the synodontis out and about. I wonder if that has anything to do with the removal of Sharkey to pastures new. I’d like to think so. There was a real scramble when I put the food in but it all seemed to be in good humour.

After feeding the fish I went to take my meds. I decided against breakfast as Yvonne will have toast or something with a coffee while we’re out and insist I do the same. I just made myself a coffee and took it through with me. I got dressed and I knew it was really cold as soon as the dressing gown came off. I was able to hang it on a nipple. Today was going to be a tee-shirt, shirt, waistcoat, jacket and overcoat day. I might not be able to move but I’d be warm. I was a vision in brown, easily hidden on an Autumn day. Today I’d just look smart. I carried on drinking and working until 7.20 am then made sure everything I needed was in my coat pockets and the bags I was taking for Yvonne were handy near the door. At 7.30 am I set out. The bags were heavy and it was a struggle. I had to keep pausing for a rest but the bus driver saw me on my way and stopped the bus for me to get on. I was really grateful. I did my usual trick of closing my eyes for most of the journey so no-one was tempted to speak. I may have even nodded off a couple of times between stops. It was quite a delayed journey courtesy of two or three sets of roadworks on the way. But when I got there, Yvonne was waiting with Reuben I’d forgotten about the vicious crop my hairstylist had given me at the weekend and didn’t expect Reuben to recognise me beardless. Yvonne walked right past me instead and Reuben was pointing at me and grinning. In recognition I hope and not at the Dali-esque moustache.

We had enough time to take a walk round the £shop before the cafe inside the clothing store opened. I got myself an elbow support bandage. and no Mike, it’s not for the reasons you keep suggesting. It’s too much tennis to blame. We actually picked up a few things from there before moving on, including batteries for the tablet type thing I’d bought Reuben. We went and settled in the cafe.She won the first skirmish of who pays and ordered me a coffee and a sausage with red onion toastie while she and Roobs had jam on toast. I’d taken the first mouthful before remembering my tablet, Oops. Once we’d done we walked round to find Reuben some pyjamas and for his dad a shirt and a cardigan to make up for the fact I’d still not found a blue waistcoat to go with his suit. I won the second skirmish. From there we went to another shop so I could show Yvonne the Jane Asher container I bought for putting tin foil in and for cutting it. No good for her as there isn’t one for the longer rolls on tinfoil but she did think it a good idea. We bought a few items there and round 3 was mine too.

The morning was getting on a bit so I suggested another drink so we’d have opportunity to sort the bags in case I had to depart quickly for the bus. We headed for the market where she’d be able to get some wool she wanted too. After the drink and when the bags were sorted 1 for me 4 for her, we took Reuben to the pet shop to see the birds. A couple of really pretty female budgies in having a good old sing song.Then it was time for me to depart for the bus and Yvonne to get home so Reuben could have a sleep as she got ready for work. The bus was slow going back too. When I got off I thought I’d go to Pauline’s for some stuff but I decided I needed a wee more and had to go straight past the shop, open my front door, abandon bag and crutches in a hurry ….and run. I made it. I worked from 1.15 to 2.15 pm, then ignoring the hundreds of messages, watched Father Brown.

At 3.00 pm I went back to work in earnest and was making some progress. At 4.15 pm though I decided I needed food so I made some beans on toast which I ate while The Antiques Trip was on. After washing up I came back through, ignoring the usual quiz. By 7.00 pm I was making real headway and had refreshed once already. I took another break until 8.00 pm  then closed the lounge down to concentrate fully on work. I was clear by 11.15 pm and able to start the blog. At this rate I may get another early night.

Wednesday.

The world and I renewed our acquaintance at 3.20 am. Though happy to have survived another night I can’t honestly say I was too chuffed about the time. I’d happily have waited a wee while longer until the world was better dressed in her finery, and you could actually see it. The fact that it was early did not negate my wish to use the loo so slippers and dressing gown on, off I went. I don’t know what it is with me and lights unless it’s the fear of disturbing someone by turning them on. Who, since there’s only me hear? Anyway, perhaps I hadn’t quite adjusted my eyes and my balance was a bit off. I crashed into the stick stand and made an almighty clatter, designed to wake the neighbourhood. My shushing of the sticks seems a little pointless now. Then turning the  corner I veered to the left a bit and walloped my knee on the radiator. Before I had time to curse I had to make a right hand turn but I was a tad too early and hit the corner with my right knee and also managed to knock over a vase of flowers. Just as well they’re artificial or a flood would have ensued. Before I entered the loo I switched the hall light on which of course I should have done at the other end.

On returning to the bedroom with two sore knees I turned that light on then nipped back to turn the hall light off. I signed on to the computer. 127 emails waiting. Two of them  were cons which quickly got consigned to the bin. Anything that purports to come from a bank where I don’t have an account automatically goes that way. The obvious adverts from  card companies followed them. One message was from a shop I sometimes visit to let me know they had a freezer in if I was still interested. The message started, “Dear Dave”. Who the heck is Dave? I’m happy for people to call me by my first name but it seems to take our relationship to a level that doesn’t exist to call me that. Frankly I hate being called Dave, my name is David though a few people still call me other things, not all complimentary. I could understand it if I ever signed myself thus but I don’t so that message too went into the bin. I got down to 104 messages that way and started on those. One of the nice jobs I get during the day is promoting other authors by retweeting their books, today was nice for me as two friends Jane Dougherty and Ali Isaac were publishing their joint venture. Love stories based on the myths of Ireland called Gra mo chroi.

Don’t forget to look for it.

At 6.10 am it was time to feed the fish. I turned both the main light and the tank light on and stood for a minute watching them. Th two lager plecs were adorning the branches of the bog wood while the smallest with its bat’s wing sleeves glided around chasing anything it bumped into. It never seems to bother him that most of the fish are bigger than him. Big Al stayed in his corner at first. Morecambe and Wise visited me at the front of the tank.The two bronze corys just darted about aimlessly, the synodontis kept coming out and going back in at the first sign of any movement around them. The two hoplos kept swimming up and down and Little Al hovered near the food slot. I opened the flap and the movement made Big All stir. He ran to the top of the tank and I started crying. Hang on, no I didn’t, it’s only on one side of my face. The little  beggar spat at me. Down he swam back to his corner. I dabbed my eye and fed them hoping secretly that they’d eat everything before Big Al stirred again. I can’t believe a fish spat at me. What have I ever done wrong? Answers on a postcard please. I took my meds, made a drink and returned to my room in disgust.

I thought I’d dealt with all the dross in my in box but I’d missed this one probably because it’s new to me and banks aren’t the first thing I associate Tesco with. This is another one of those that I find very disturbing because of it’s seeming authenticity. If you know anyone who banks with Tesco please warn them not to open this if it arrives.

Dear Account Holder,
Your TESCO Savings Account was accessed on a blacklisted IP address North London,
but for security reasons the requested transaction was refused.
You are required to update and confirm your TESCO Savings account details with us
as you will not be able to have access to your accounts until this has been done.
CLICK HERE TO PROCEED
Once you’ve completed this you’ll be able to manage your money whenever you want,
giving you more control of your finances.
Thank you for helping us serve you better,
TESCO BANK
Copyright © 2015 Tesco Personal Finance plc

I decided to carry on until  my email accounts were empty before going out. So when I threw my hands in the air and cheered at 9.10 am you’d guess I was pleased. I got washed and dressed and about 9.30 am went out to Pauline’s to pick up a few things. I resisted the temptation to buy a chocolate gateau as I know there are still chocolate puddings in the fridge. Wen I got back I put the shopping away and then returned to my desk to see what else had arrived. There was enough to keep me going until 10.45 am and then I called a break and sat in the lounge. I lay back in my chair with my eyes closed and totally relaxed. I have no idea if I actually went to sleep, it didn’t seem so at the time. It was 11.50 am  before I decide I needed to start my lunch, liver and onions with mash today, and a piece of bread and butter for the left over gravy. I ate it during Murder She Wrote as Jessica Fletcher solved her latest case in a college. Once it was over I returned to work. There was quite a lot again and I knew I’d struggle a bit so I decided not to bother with Father Brown today, but to plod on. At 4.15 pm I realised I’d need a sandwich for tea with Dil and Matt coming so ignoring what was left I went to feed the face. Antique Road Trip came on purely by coincidence (cough) while I was there so I stayed and watched it. at 5.15 pm it wasn’t worth going back so I started watching the quiz Pointless with one eye, while they other tried to watch for my visitors arriving.

I just caught a glimpse of them and I’m sure it’s because I was by now cross-eyed. I’m also sure they’ve taken to creeping past on hands and knees to surprise me. I ran into the kitchen and started making drinks as they came in the front door shouting ‘Hi’. I told them I’d had a message from Lee a few minutes before saying he couldn’t make it again, but hopefully next week. I passed the drinks through as they watched to the end of the quiz when I turned the TV off and we got the table and the games out. We were starting with Yahtzee again this week. I was the over all winner, taking three of the 6 games. It was amazing,,I even got 2 Yahtzees in the one game tonight for 100 point bonus. We moved on to Nomination Whist next where despite a good start at a game I excel in, I hadn’t even reached 3 figures when we’d finished. I was in last place, Dil first . The last game was Chase The Lady and what a start I had. no points in the first hand then just 5 in the second.I thought playing as I was I’d be unassailable. I hadn’t counted on being in the room with two vindictive people. The Queen of Spades was dropped on me so often after those hands I thought we should be engaged. Needless to say my score started to soar past theirs and I was first to the post, Dil second, Matt the Winner by ten points over Dil.

Once they’d gone I tidied up, washed the pots and went looking for the mirror I must have broken today my luck is so bad. I took my meds said goodnight to the fish and came back through to the bedroom. I eventually gave up sulking and got on with the mail of which there was almost 200 again. I worked on it until 11.00 pm without making much of a dent . Once I finish the blog I’ll go back to it for a while. I have a headache and would enjoy a sleep.

Adoration

Trying to copy Pops’s cross look.

Thursday.

It was 4.30 am today so that’s just about three and a half hours. My campaign for a sleep extension seems to have fallen on deaf ears. I got up. I put on the bedroom light in order to avoid stubbed toes, put on my dressing gown and slippers and strolled to the loo. No urgency since I haven’t been to sleep long enough to actually put m bladder to any difficult time trials. I came back and put the computer on and started work. I almost missed a notice about Windows updates and had it close down on me but I caught it in time.I gave myself four hours and judging by the mail I needed it. At 6.00 am I took a break to see to the fish, I think they got so used to the time why change it again? Both light went on and I saw there was a deal of activity. Lots of play round the new log, in and out of the various tunnels it made and fun round he branches. Certain fish didn’t join in the fun of course but I wasn’t sorry about that and was keeping a weather eye on him as I opened the flap. In went the food and down went the flap again. I spoke to them all for a minute and was visited by Morecambe of course, Wise was too busy eating. One of the syodontis came out as I’d dropped a few pellets near his hidey-hole. Of the other one there was no sign, Mike said on Sunday that it’s take to hiding in the pipe of the old water filter pump.

I let the fish get on with it and turned round to take my tablets. I thought breakfast was in order today so took my pre-food first. After taking the normal tabs and sprays I had a cigarette to give the pre-food one time to do whatever it does before sticking two slices of thick bread inn the toaster.When the toast was gone, I made myself a coffee and took the two after food tablets before heading back to my bedroom to carry on working. At 8.30 am I let Windows do it’s update. I didn’t lift my head again until 9.35 am when the postman came. There was nothing of any real interest but I was glad to move my legs. Unfortunately, I had to move them back again, there was still work to  be done. It was 10.20 when I was finally as clear as I could be. Things were taking a while to load so I signed out of my main email address for a few moments then went to sign back in as that usually solves the problem. This time it wouldn’t let me sign in. There was a message about the wrong URL for this platform or something.  I no longer have any hair left to pull out. In the end I had to use the restore facility back to prior to the current Windows download. This time it worked. I worked on the new mail until I was clear again and knocked off at 11.20 am. Too early for lunch but lovely for a sit in the lounge and a stare out of the windows. Ha, you thought I was going to say I nodded off, well na na, na na na. I lunched at midday on chips with curry sauce, my once a week treat at the moment. A this is my second tablet meal of the day I can have what I want at tea time.

At 1.00 pm I returned to my desk and risked one eye on seeing how much mail there was. There was! But, I wasn’t going to let it stop me today. I worked until 2.15 pm then suffered three quarters of an hour of Father Brown, what a missed opportunity for sleep that was. At 2.30 pm I’d had a text off Mike to say he was on his way which brightened my day a bit. Promptly at 3.00 pm I returned to work and by dint of hard labour I was within a hair’s breadth of being up to date when 4.30 pm came and my Road Trip programme. I was expecting Mike around 5.00 pm and nipped through to put the kettle on a couple of minutes beforehand. I know I saw the start of the auction but I’m not convinced I saw the end of it at 5.15 pm. When I next came too it was almost 6.00 pm and Mike was sitting next to me saying “Hello Noddy.” He nipped through and boiled the kettle again to do his drink which he’d done without for fear of waking me. I went and made him some syrup sponges with custard in thanks, I may just have had a chocolate one with chocolate custard. We watched a quiz then what amounted to three antique shows until 8.00 pm when I had to depart before the pressure of knowing I had emails blew my ears off. I worked until 10.00 pm when Mike came through to remind me about my tablets then worked again until 10.30 pm when I broke off to do the blog. Since it’s well gone 11.00 pm now I’m going back to it for a while to soften the blow for the morning.

Friday.

Despite a light off time of 1.00 am last night it was still a 4.02 am start today. I’m writing a letter of resignation the minute I get a chance, I don”t think I like this job anymore. As usual it was a case of priorities, a tinkle time trip for which I turned the light on in my bedroom rather than the halllway so it didn’t disturb Mike and then back to power up the computer. There were absolutely tons of mail from last night still to do which I still hadn’t caught up on at 6.00 am when I went to feed the fish.. I found them all milling about this morning in some complicated folk dance pattern of interweaving that almost made me cross eyed, but the minute the flap opened there was an air of anticipation that hit you like a brick wall. As I slipped the food in it quickly became every man fish for himself itself. I took all my morning meds then filled up the boxes with another week’s supply and prepared a prescription request for those that needed replacing as I do every two weeks for half of it. A usual that took me quite a time and it was almost 7.00 am before I was able to take a coffee back to my room.

As soon as I’ completed all last night’s outstanding mail I went straight on to today’s and worked up till 8.00 am when I returned to the kitchen to make a drink for Mike. I work to the formula wake him at 8, get him out by 9, hopefully to arrive at his Dad’s by 10.00 am. I woke him at 8.00 am with a drink and he shouted something unintelligible at me. He got up at 8.25 am. He was full of head cold so at 9.15 am decided he wasn’t going out at all then changed his mind five minutes later when he phoned is Dad. He left at 9.35 am and I have no idea what time he arrived there. I’d dressed at 9.00 am and gone to Pauline’s at 9.15 am so arrived back to a hive of activity as he got ready to go. I returned to work at 9.30 am and worked hard through the morning to get clear which I did at 11.35 am.  I went through to the lounge and relaxed a few minutes with the TV. At 12.10 pm there was a knock on the door which I recognised as one of the wardens who’d come for a chat. As I let her in she immediately asked If I were low today as I seemed flat. No-one ever seems to say that about my stomach. We chatted for a while and then she left at 12.45 at which time I started peeling and chopping a sweet potato. As I put that in the microwave to cook I out some sausages under the grill. Pretty soon I was tucking into bangers and mash. At 1.20 pm it was back to work for a while because at 2.15 I was breaking for Father Brown.

I fully intended returning to work at 3.00 pm when Father Brown was over but I’d dropped off before the end (bliss) and slept on until 3.20 pm. I flew back down the hall and started again. I fully intended to stop at 4.30 pm for the Road Trip but at 4.30 pm Mike sent a text to say he was on the way and I noticed that my inbox was showing 97 outstanding on my second account and I still hadn’t finished the first. Antiques went by the wayside. I expected Mike to arrive about 6.00 pm so went through a few minuted early to put the kettle on. While I was there I thought I’d get a few things together from the laundry. The towels for the bathroom, a pair of lounge pants for after my bath, a clean tee-shirt , a pair of shreddies and a pair of socks. I dropped the towels off on my way to the bedroom where I put the clean clothing on my bed then I was distracted hearing the kettle click off. I waited in the lounge watching Eggheads and Mike eventually turned up at 6.20 pm as there had been a nasty accident on the motorway. He poured his coffee and sat with me. As Eggheads ended I said I was going for a shower thinking I could do my own hair this week since so much of it’s gone missing but he insisted he’d still do it.

It took him about 30 seconds to do and then he breather near me and it was dry. I took my shower. My balance wasn’t up to much so Mike got me to sit afterwards and dried my hair even more but with a towel this time. I went through to the bedroom and sorted a shirt for tomorrow and then went to move the shreddies and socks to the back of my chair. Socks yes, shreddies no. I went back to the kitchen to make sure I’d actually picked them up and then seeing I had, I followed my route to the bathroom where I made sure I hadn’t left them with the towels then on to the bedroom, checking the floor in case I’d dropped them.Nothing.I did the journey in reverse, still nothing. Mike asked what was going on and when I explained he offered to help.He went to all the places I hadn’t been and then a tour of those I had. I dreaded him finding them as I didn’t want to see him walking towards me with a big grin and a pair of my jockey shorts round his ears. I was OK as he didn’t find them but I was flummoxed and it was annoying. I got another pair out.

We watched some TV together and had some tea, then at 8.45 pm I came back through to work. I was horrified at the amount waiting and wondered if I’d get to bed at all tonight. I apologise here and now most sincerely. I took a step I’ve never taken before. I started deleting anything that wasn’t addressed directly to me. Anything that was a general message that included me. I kept likes, follows, re-tweets , specific tweet messages and of course all personal messages and ploughed into dealing with them. It was 11.10 pm when I finished and I haven’t dared refresh since then. I wanted to get straight on with the blog. Mike stuck his head in to say goodnight and what’s the first thing he saw? The missing shreddies which I’d apparently put on my radiator and had walked past them so many times. He went off to bed smug.

Saturday.

I’m trying to decide whether to save myself some time by either not going to bed at all or not bother undressing so I can swing an extra few minutes in there. I got to bed a little after midnight and as usual tried to unwind with my book. I turned the light out about 1.00 pm as usual and as the book wasn’t 50 Shades of Smut there wasn’t anything to excite me and stop me sleeping. I know I woke up at 1.53 am but I was in that muggy state where I knew an inch further down the bed in the warm I’d be asleep again. I wriggled down. Next thing I know I’m wide awake and it’s 2.43 am and even digging my way in at the bottom of my bed wasn’t getting me back to sleep. I didn’t even need the loo so could log back on to the computer before it had even cooled down. The mail from last night was horrific especially when added to the mail since midnight but at least I had the advantage of time.

I don’t like the idea of only doing things for people who do them for me but I may have to take the advice I’ve been given and start unfollowing some blogs to reduce my workload and the first to go would be those who don’t re-tweet for me, like, comment or anything if I’ve been doing it for them. I’m told it’s the normal way to go. I don’t want to have to work the way I did yesterday which isn’t fair but staying in all day every day is the only way to cope otherwise. That might appeal to me but I’d never be allowed to get away with it by my keepers. Talking of whom, The Mike keeper was coughing all night so this cold really has a grip on him. Yesterday he refused to let me pick anything up for him, but I’m determined to do so today. I’d actually finished and was up to date before 6.00 pm so spent a little time drooling on ebay. There are some Welsh money Notes for sale and they seem to be as rare as hens teeth.

 

I’m bidding on a couple but not with any great expectation of getting them. I’d dearly love to though. I found them beautiful.

I was just going to pay a visit at 6.00 pm when I heard Mike cough and st up with an “Oh Damn” as a sign of exasperation. I stood at his door for a minute while he had a drink and asked whether he was snuggling back down or if he wanted a coffee.I got my answer as I saw his head disappear. I continued on my journey to the loo and then onward to the fish. I turned on the kitchen light and then brought the day to the tank as well. Pepper was sidling up to Big Al as though they knew it was Valentines day, I wouldn’t have been in the least bit surprised to see a bouquet of weed ( no love, not THAT kind of weed) and a few choice bits of algae passing between them. The rest of the crew seemed to be having a party and I suppose that I , the main caterer, was late. I fed them and just watched their antics for a while. After a bit I left them to it but at least it had put a smile on my face. I poured myself some milk, took my meds and made a coffee to take back with me. Not too much had happened since I’d been away so everything was shipshape by 6.50 am. To be honest I wasn’t sure what to do about Mike. Leave him there until he got up of his own accord, but then I remembered Anton would need him on Tuesday. Or, wake him as usual with a coffee but give him the opportunity to stay in and keep warm. I opted for the latter.So, after I heard his alarm go off and be ignored at 7.00 am I made a coffee and took it through. I called him to let him know it was there and on the bedside stand. It was a three grunt day. I left and made myself another drink. I almost spilled the lot and had to call out a team to shock my heart when I saw Mike walk into the lounge. Saturday and just a one Alarm one Call day, who’s going to believe that? Even I don’t and I was there. This vision of unloveliness passed me his dirty mug from last night then went to sit down with  his drink, his first cigarette of the day and a hacking cough.

We were out of the house by about 7.50 am and on our way to Asda. When we arrived Mike howled at the price of diesel as it had gone up since yesterday and yesterday he’d put off filling up. We entered the store and Mike went to choose the flowers for Ju today while I went to pick up potatoes. Then as we moved on I came across a sigh advertising the last reductions in the sale on clothing and found four shirts and a pair of chino’s at £1 each. I couldn’t believe it and nor could the little old lady I snatched them off. Before you say anything , it wasn’t my fault she ended up on the floor, that was the dirty floor. Anyway they’d never have fitted her. We carried on and did the shopping trying to fit it into any little space in the trolley I’d left. Well, you have to get your priorities right don’t you, £1 each eh.We tried to go for a coffee when we’d finished but for the second time recently MacDonald’s had no hot drinks available. Their machines were offline or something. Instead we headed straight for Flint and Temptations. A drink and a teasted toecake was the order of the day when we got there and Kyle was happy to oblige. We passed the usual chocolates over and sat down. Ceri was upstairs making sandwiches so there was no real banter this morning  We did manage to see her for a minute before we left and I was delighted to get a kiss.

We hiked round a few shops for different things an we were looking for a bin for Mike’s dad but couldn’t find one. About 11.30 I could see Mike was itching to go, this cold is really getting to him. We went straight of to have lunch though I did offer to feed him at home if he wanted to wrap up on the settee. Maybe that’s why we ended up at the Ivy. Our usual seats were taken as were our back ups. Fortunately our back up, back ups were OK as they were the last special ones near the fire. We grabbed them. It wasn’t too crowded in there but as we got our drinks and ordered lunch some more decided they’d finished leaving just us and our usual table left. We could glare at then all we wanted as the chimney breast was between us. As we were half way through our meal they got up and left but it didn’t seem worth moving then. There ha been a kiss from Angie when we went in and handed over the chocs, then hugs from Tariq though he didn’t have long at that time. When he came to us later I told him he’d have to do without us soon as Mike is disappearing to Canada for 3 weeks again. Good old Tariq said he’d either find a way to get me there to eat or he’d visit me in the evening. I reminded him he”s got a life and a family. Shella came to talk to us and brought us a chocolate heart each. That was sweet.

After we’d left it was straight home and put the shopping away. Then Mike came through with me to look at the fish I’d found I wanted him to look at. Showed him the one I want and showed him the select few he can choose one from. I think he likes a zebra plec or a pyjama catfish best.Once he’d gone through to have a sleep about 3.00 pm, I was able to tackle the mail.As expected with 8 hours away there was a lot. I dealt with the more personal ones first then the rest. I could only work until 5.30 pm as it’s only fair to give Mike some company in the evening but fair play, he didn’t complain when I came back through at 8.30 pm. As usual I’ve been here ever since. I stopped work on the mail at 10.45 pm to give me chance to do the blog post and now I’m going back for a while. I shall be in bed by the witching hour.

I’m not very fond of musicals though some songs do make the grade and stay with you. One of those whose music I like is West Side Story. In honour of St.Valentine’s day tonight’s song, so romantic, is sung by a great and vastly underated singer whom I once had the pleasure of seeing live. P.J.Proby

Sunday bloody Sunday & ISP Wails in Wales.

Sunday. It was a bit of a restless night so I managed to sleep a bit longer this morning. I didn’t get up until 5.56 am and flicked the computer on as I was leaving the room for the loo. It was ready to go when I got back. Strangely there were only fifty- odd ( rather than fifty odd) pieces of mail and happily a good few were about last weeks blog. and happily no-one has yet claimer terminal boredom. There was another of the fraudulent mails and it upset me quite a lot. This one claims to be a woman currently in London staying in a cancer hospital with terminal cancer and no more than two months to live. She and her husband lived ( guess where) in Nigeria for some years where he worked and invested. When he died she sold up a shopping mall, a hotel blah, blah, blah. The money is still in a bank out there but she won’t be able to go back. She specifically wants me to take on the couple of million she has and donate it to charity less 20% which I can keep for expenses. This is one of the more wicked cons out there appealing to people’s sympathy. I also had the standard bank manager with a deceased client message which gets sent to the crap pile without hesitation.

At 7.00 am I fed the fish though you wouldn’t know it as they all had their backs to me and were swimming to the furthest corner away from me. I assume that’s because he didn’t get fed yesterday. They should know by now that Saturday is diet day, for fish at least. I turned to take my meds and included one for a pre-meal. After about ten mins I was ready to have a bowl of shreddies but was overcome by spirit instead. I was forced to eat two doughnuts instead. Erm, don’t have a go at me though, there were three there and I was only forced to eat two. I took my after meal tabs and retired back to the bedroom with my coffee. Away from the temptations of the kitchen and whatever malevolent spirit resides there. I worked through a couple of mail refreshes until I was clear about 10.15 am. I decided at that point to print some pictures off to fill a frame for Yvonne. including a copy of the one taken of me with Reuben by Tariq. I knew my black ink was almost gone so I thought I’d better change that first. When I turned on and checked, it seems all of the inks were getting low and not wanting a hiccup during printing I thought I’d change them all. I’d bought quite a few last time as the compatible inks are quite inexpensive.

I got the cartridge holder to the right position, shook the new inks, took them out of their wrappers and inserted them one by one as I took the old ones out. I was very careful with the disposal of the old ones. I set the printer to go and all I kept getting was a message to say that these inks were incompatible with the printer. Nothing I could do would change the message so I’ve now got new inks in and can’t print anything. I ended up having to go to Amazon to buy proper Epson inks. The annoying thing is these cartridges are exactly the same as the ones I took out and were part of the same order. I won’t be able to do anything until the Epson inks get here from Jersey. I expect they’ll be gold plated at the price I had to pay. Unless maybe they come with a free holiday on Jersey.

That messing about took me to lunchtime where I had every intention of being good. Unfortunately the spirit wasn’t so inclined and I ended up with four rashers of bacon (sliced with a razor blade), a Bury black pudding ( all the best ones are from Bury) and a small tin of beans. By choice I added two baps to that. I struggled to eat it all but after a dynamic effort almost made it. I put the last bean in the food waste bin. I followed up with a Kitkat. It’s only now I realise how lucky I am not to have been forced to eat the BFG from the freezer which I’d forgotten about. After lunch I had a Sunday nap in my chair which was quite welcome but when I woke up I was talking to someone on the couch and I’ve no idea who. I felt quite lonely actually and went back to work. I stayed there until 5.30 pm when I went to watch part of a film and then an episode of Inspector Morse  followed by The Antiques Road Show. It was time then to come through and have the last mass catch-up of the mail and start the blog.

Monday. Well, it was a little better last night and I slept until 6.05 am so swinging myself out of bed wasn’t too difficult.I should perhaps have been in a sitting position first though as when my feet swung left to right to find my slippers, my head swung left to right into the wall. It’s OK though, the wall wasn’t hurt too much and isn’t going to sue. The trouble is, wherever I have the bed in this room it has to be side on to a wall unless I remove the rest of the furniture. Where it is now is right next to the emergency alarm which I may have to use if I clout myself like that one more time. I whimpered my way down the passage to the loo.  I considered an en suite but chamber pots are so passe now and I didn’t want to passe it by in the middle of the night. I returned from the loo and turned the computer on. A couple of days ago I received an email purporting to be from createspace telling me they were having problems making a payment to me. I did nothing about it as the same day I received notice of a payment due in about a week. Today I had the same message again and I’m uncomfortable about it. It looks real, it reads real but my nose says something is off so I’ve messaged their help desk to ask if it’s real or a convincing con. I’ll keep you informed of any answer. Maybe I’m getting paranoid now.

I saw to the fish at 7.30 am and also had a bit of breakfast. I was sure I was going to have Shreddies but as I poured they came out as Rice Krispies. Tomorrow I’m going to try it with my eyes open. I took a coffee back to my desk then went to get washed and dressed. I’m not going out and I’m expecting no visitors but you never know. At about 9.30 am I realised I needed to go out with my prescription request so I’ll have the drugs ready for Thursday/Friday when it comes to doing the week’s supply. I donned my leather jacket and headed out. The rain was like a continuous waterfall and I was drenched within feet, at least my head and my legs were. By the time I got back I was like a drowned rat ( sorry girls) and had to towel dry my hair and glasses before I could see to change. If I’d thought to pick up cigarettes while out I could have avoided a trip in the morning. I’ll have to go early so I don’t miss the postman again.

At lunchtime I had a lamb shank with mashed potatoes, peas and carrots. Very tasty. Then it was time for my afternoon kip. I hadn’t intended too and was quite enjoying a film. When I woke up I wondered how it had become a murder until I understood  I’d missed both an end and a beginning. So, back to work. On a serious note I’m both worried and disgusted with the number of countries who are becoming right-wing. The number where there are signs of anti-Semitism growing again as in the Ukraine and where there is an anti-gay movement . If it’s true that the UK and the US are responsible for the current regime in the Ukraine because the previous Government were not wanting to join the EU then both Governments have a lot to answer for. A number of deaths can be laid at their door already.                                                                      I worked until teatime when I had a bowl of strawberries then watched my quizzes, half an antiques programme and hen a film called ‘Employee of the month’ that made me smile a few times. At 9.00 pm I came through in the hopes of finishing the mail and the blog early. Well that’s not happening.

Zebra Boy

Tuesday.You remember Julie Andrews singing as she worked her way through an alpine meadow with the von Trapp kids in tow, Idle Swine, Idle Swine every morning you greet me, or words to that effect. Well I checked the bathroom mirror this morning and Idle Swine stared back at me. It was 6.25 am before I got up today and I’d barely been for the stop-start mission before it was time to feed the fish and myself. They got some very boring fish flakes and I got some rather tasty, thick, buttered toast. It was a nice change from my cereal and I was able to use up the last of the weekend’s baps. After taking my drugs I wandered back to my bedroom with the coffee that was going to wake me up. I turned on the machine and got started. Content wasn’t too bad in that no-one was trying to con me first thing and I did get my answering email from Createspace. Their messages were genuine. It seems they’ve been having a problem paying me since January. I followed a different set of directions to the last ones but seemed to end up in the same place. The difficulty is they don’t tell you what the problems are. I had to un-click a couple of things then re-click them in the hope it kick starts whatever isn’t working. If it goes Kaput again I don’t know what I’ll do as changing back to cheques isn’t an option as bank charges will eat up the value.

At  just gone 9.00 am I got dressed and went to replenish the ciggie supplies at Pauline’s. I got fresh baps and my new TV mag while I was there. Then it was home again to work while waiting for the postman. It was getting to be late morning when there was a knock on the front door. I must have been concentrating heavily as I left my seat but not in a good way and came down holding my chest in fright. Another small knock and I went to answer. I could see it was my postie before I opened the door. The parcel I had to sign for was no longer than a cigarette and not much thicker. My Iodine has arrived. Before going through to make my lunch I bared my stomach (look away ladies) and painted a patch about the size of a 50p piece or a 2 cent Australian coin I’m reliably informed. While waiting for it to dry I left my stomach bared and read the brochure that said how important Iodine is to the body and how the chemicals in our water depletes it. Hopefully this will help me chase of the chest before I have to go back to the doctor’s again. I covered the stomach up took a tablet then placed a cottage pie in the micro ( Yes, I know I said I was fed up with them but the shop we went to at the weekend had little choice). I’d just about finished eating when I glances someone cross in front of the window. As best I could I ran to the kitchen with my tray, turned the TV down and went to the front door. There was my wonderful Crazy Cat Lady Helen. Since she’s left the Ivy and doesn’t want to lose touch she’s come to visit. I had no problem opening the door to her and ushering her in. You can’t help but be relaxed in her company. As a ( sort of ) joke she even brought me a packet of ham and two little eggs from her own hens, freshly laid. I gave her the midge fragnet Mike had brought her back from Canada and a box of chocolates as she now misses out. She was with me well over an hour and was a delight. We talked about her crafting and was able to give her two crafting CDroms from Ju’s collection that she didn’t have.

When Helen left I felt quite bereft and had to go straight back to work on the computer. I stayed there most of the afternoon catching up. There was another knock at the door and this time it was my drugs ‘mule’ from the chemist bringing the latest supplies. After I’d signed Rasputin ( who notices) I took the drugs to the kitchen and went to sit down with a film. At just gone 4.30 pm when I had the lap top on my knees and was swearing at it’s lack of speed, I may have been contemplating a quick kip when I heard the sound of the door opening. I couldn’t hear too well and my mind registered nothing but shock until Ugo walked into the room bearing a stern looking Reuben.But lo and behold he smiled at me. I turned the laptop off and took Reuben from Ugo so he could visit the loo, the dance he was doing was quite unseemly. I was able to dodge the grab for the glasses and took him to the mirror which he loves ( talk about vain and Reuben’s no better). Ugo came back and decdided to give Reuben some milk but for some reason his eyes were following me around and his arms opened to indicate a pick up. I did so gladly and Ugo took a walk to the chippie. Ten  minutes later he was back with sausage and chips for me  ( come on, I had to make an effort after he’d bought them) and whatever rubbish he was having in the kebab line. But first he took Reuben back and started to feed him while I ate my tea. Afterwards we swapped so Ugo could eat and I played with Reuben. I made Ugo’s pudding and almost collapsed with shock to find he only wanted ONE chocolate pudding but would take custard with it. They left about 6.00 pm so Reuben would be back for his bedtime. After I’d waved them off it was straight back here playing catch up again. I’d thought about going back through t the lounge for a late episode of The Mentalist but instead settled for an earlier episode of SG1 from 8 – 9.00 pm. Then it was back here for the rest of the night.

Mischief 1

Destruction accomplished.

 

 

Wednesday. I had an inkling this was not going to be a good day when I opened my eyes at 6.55 am

that’s almost afternoon as far as I’m concerned. Bypassing the computer, I didn’t stop to collect my £200 for passing go but shot straight to the loo and from there to the kitchen.

I fed the fish and at least they couldn’t accuse me of being late. No sign of the assassins at all. I don’t remember them booking holidays just because the weather looks good. I had my meds, made a coffee and had some Shreddies for breakfast. Kitchen duties finished I headed back to the pit and turned the computer on. Wow, 107 messages. I ploughed in and was making good progress when about 9.30 am there was a knock at the door. Because I wasn’t dressed yet I was careful how I appeared but it was only my favourite postman. YAY, my inks. I signed for them and came back to the pit full of the joys of Spring knowing I could now print off the pictures I wanted to do for the frame I have for Yvonne. Bollards ! I opened the package and there were only 3 inks, the fourth would be coming by a separate delivery with no mention as to how long. Deflated I returned to the mail.

By 10.00 am I had finished the first batch and decided not to refresh until I’d dressed and hoovered up. A quick mop of the kitchen floor and I got the Hoover out. I did all through the lounge though it didn’t seem to matter what setting it was on, thick carpet, thin carpet or hard floor I felt sure I could have done a better job just sucking in hard. I know the bag is empty so it’s not that. I set it for thick carpet and assaulted the hall. It seemed to do well on the hard floor but I ended up using it more as a carpet beater in the end. I decided to give my pit a miss as I’d be working in here in a few minutes………. or so I thought. When I got back my modem was showing access-local only which means the internet is down. I turned the modem off and waited the prescribed time before turning back on, no change. I turned the computer off and rebooted, no change. I did everything I could think of but it made no difference, I’m off. The rest of the morning and most of the afternoon I was either in a state of misery or abject fear at knowing how my messages would be accumulating.

At 5.00 pm relief came in the form of my brother Dil and nephew Matt. I’d almost forgotten Dil had told me last week that he was on holiday this week. While I made drinks Matt checked his tablet and said it looked as though TalkTalk was having some problems so the fault might lie at their end. That was some relief as I knew I hadn’t touched the modem with the Hoover while I worked.

Drinks distributed we started play. Two games of Scrabble later and both Dil’s an my chin were on the floor and Matt had conquered us both. Despite some nice little wordplay by me with adit, aglet and qua Matt’s tablet was coming up with words to beat my brain like qi and other little gems.

We turned to Nomination Whist and with a struggle I came joint first with Matt. The boy is on fire tonight. At least in crazy 8’s I won convincingly pushing Matt over the 300 mark before I hit 3 figures and Dil had only just got over the 100. Finally it was Cribbage and through more luck than judgement I managed to cross the line first. Dil said nothing but you could hear the cogs turning so I’ll have to watch my step next week. They left at just gone 9.30 pm so I tidied up , washed the pots and headed for my pit. Still no luck though I tried turning the modem off again for a few minutes then back on. I’m left to wonder whether the modem was upset that I hoovered so close to it. Maybe it was shock at me hoovering at all.

I went to bed very unhappy, picked a book to read about the dark history of some European Kings and Queens though it seemed to be quite lenient with the Titles as Elizabeth Bathory was not a Queen and Giles de Rais was not a King. I think I only read till 11.00 pm before trying to sleep.

 

Thursday. Much more like usual I woke at 5.52 am but was amazed I’d slept so long with no forays to and from the loo during the night. I didn’t turn the computer on but went straight to the loo checking the modem on my way back. Still nothing. All the lights are on except the internet one.I turned it off as I went past heading for the kitchen. I turned on the tank light and prepared to say “Good Morning” to them all but disaster had struck. Big Bill the circle swimming Angel Fish had finally succumbed to ‘whatever’ and was lying on the bottom of the tank. I cleared the plants and vases from the top and went in with my net to get him. There was some weed about him which came out too and I was quite cross as I’ve been putting something in to kill the weed off. I was annoyed in case he’d got tangled and the lack of motion had caused him to drown. I don’t think it was that however as there didn’t seem to be enough to have stopped him moving. While I was tere I used the net to gather as many snails as I could and as much weed as I could then buried the lot in the dustbin in a plastic cup. There are now 3 bull nosed placs, a small fish with a flashy tail and a small catfish which is completely white with red eyes ( I know there’s a word for it but can’t remember it this morning).

I had my meds then a piece of toast before coming back through, turning the modem back on as I came.Still nothing. I turned the computer on so that I could record the diary entry oherwise I’ll never remember anything. What surprised me was a pop-up saying there are windows updates and the computer would be turned off in ten minutes. I put it off for an hour. How are windows updates getting through if there’s no internet?

YAY. 10.45 am and I’m back up and running. Only 305 messages await in 24 hours !!!!!!! It’s scary. I’ve no choice but to start reading and typing. Some messages I might pay more attention to usually will have to be passed over if I want to finish sometime today. Food, who has time for that? Well, now that you mention it, it’s almost one o’clock and I need it. Yes, another cottage pie but I did have pizza and chips yesterday- comfort food, today it’s speed food. After that it’s back to work and work and work and work. Tonight it’s my 8.00-8.30 Big Bang Theory and then at 10.00 pm my Person of Interest I don’t want to miss those.

I had a real push and got the post down before Big Bang so I didn’t miss it after all but it’s now 9.49 pm and I’m worried about my other prog. Nearly 60 to go and that makes 487 in all today unless I refresh it again……. See you later.

Friday.Ah, much more back to normal today. I didn’t have to beat sleep off with a big stick in the hopes of my internet returning, I managed to finish by 1.00 am and in total it was 532 messages and 2 blog posts. I was up at 4.46 am telling myself that today would be the Queen of Days this week now I can communicate with the outside world again other than by banging on the walls and hoping someone hears me.

My first batch was done by 6.30 am and I decided to give the fish an early treat. They were all there alive and flipping. I picked up my tablet container and realised I needed to refill it as soon as I’d taken this mornings doses so I swallowed those and got out the new drugs and filled the little compartments which took about 20 minutes then had some breakfast. I took my coffee back through to the bedroom about 7.15 am and refreshed. Not too bad, just 37. I managed to keep on top of things so that when 9.15 am came I was able to get dressed and go to the post office with my voting form. The reason for my mini rant earlier in the week was the form contained four far right groups hiding behind new names, The British National Party is known to be right wing fascist and racist but then you have the English Defence League which is an offshoot of the BNP, Put Britain First is another then we have United Kingdom Independence Party which appears to be OK until you see their history and find they were practically founded by people from the BNP who seem to be still there. There is a group called No2EU which is another on that could appeal to people who don’t take the time to check that this is run by the Chairman of the Communist Party of GB.That leaves the LibDems who haven’t earned themselves any trust since they’ve been power sharing with the Conservatives, who themselves have broken promises since they came to power and are treating the disadvantaged, the sick and the vulnerable very badly with benefits changes while giving tax breaks to the wealthy. They had an opportunity to govern fairly but have now probably lost that opportunity. There are the Labour party who are profligate with our money and despite raising taxes ( as always) they borrowed a lot of money and left the UK in heavy debt. Lastly there is Plaid Cymrru the aprty of Wales who can only be elected to serve Wales and not England so that’s a choice England don’t have. If large tax dodging corporations paid their way and if  he tax relief for the wealthy was lowered then the benefit changes wouldn’t need to be made at all.

Whinge over………..I got back from the Post Office to find the internet kaput again. I calmly pulled the rest of the hair from my head and got back down to turn off the modem and take all plugs out, wiggle them ( technical term) and replace them before turning the modem back on. Glory Be, it’s back !! I almost kissed the postman and might have done if he hadn’t looked so shocked, dropped my stuff and run off. Here was the last of my ink. Double YAY. I performed the difficult task of changing all the inks while simultaneously cursing that the ones I was throwing away were new. Then I set to selecting three pictures to print off to fit the triple frame I mentioned earlier in the week. The spaces were 6″ x 4″ so I had to guess their sizes on a couple of A4 sheets of foto paper. I couldn’t have done better. Everything came out so well. Lunch time came and I retired to the kitchen to make a pizza with micro chips, not forgetting the buttered bap. I’d not long finished when I got a text message ‘ On Way’. Fantastic, I had n’t expected Mike to be this early as he was getting here late afternoon the last few occasions.

I made sure the mail was up to date so I’d be free when he got here. So, when he arrived just before 3.00 pm I got the kettle on ready and was almost pouring it as he reached the kitchen. I got my usual (brotherly) kiss and a hug and then he parked his bum and told me about his week. If he left out the bits about nooky it would have taken about ten minutes but he’s had a good week, a better week than me the miserable beggar. We watched a couple of quizzes together answering as we went along then he had something to eat. He washed my hair ( quite difficult for me), I had a shower and then we relaxed again to chat and eventually watch the TV a little more. At 9.00 pm I came through and left him to his own devices. I think I’ve managed to catch up again but still the occasional hicccup with WordPress sites keep asking me to sign in but not carrying comments over.

Saturday. I’m not too unhappy at 5.45 am this morning as it allows me to get a start on the mail. I know Mike’s put his alarm on for 7.00 am as he asked me what time last night and I suggested 6.45 am I stopped him from laughing before he choked. Well, I was doing OK and making good progress when I heard his alarm go off, and off, and off. It was still ringing when I left the bedroom to go to the kitchen to put the kettle on and turn the light on for the fish. I had time to take my two sprays, take all my tablets and put a piece of toast on before the kettle boiled and I made Mike’s coffee. I took it through o his room, put it on the bedside table furthest away and called        ” Coffee’s up Bro”. There were some unintelligible grunts in what I took to be either Polish or maybe High Neptunian for all I know as I left the room to return to my toast. It was about 5 mins later I heard the slither of his feet and the clicking of his nails on the laminate floor of the lounge. I must remember to get the vet to file those nails down or at least get Mike to stand upright and keep his hands off the floor. 

I went about emptying bins and writing a note in  large black crayon asking the food waste wagon to leave me some new bags as the previous one foot square note must have been too small for them to see. I have 2 bins and up to 4 bags to sort on a Saturday. Some places have an extra bin for garden waste too. There’s no room to leave the driveway on a Saturday. It was almost 7.30 am as I went back in the house and found a fully compost mental human being ready to converse . By 7.50 am we were actually leaving the house and I had only left 14 messages undone. We drove ( well technically HE drove but he says I do a good job of trying to from the passenger seat so I’m counting that a a win) to the big ASDA to shop and yet again I was lucky enough to find some nice things for Reuben. Oh, I did manage to pick up some food too. We had a drink before we left as I was so dry but I had to give up before the end as I’d chosen one of those iced coffees and was on the brink of brain freeze. We  OK, HE drove to Flint where after buying some chocolates we had another drink but this time in Temptations where I was greeted nicely by Daniel as Mike shot straight past and headed for the loo. Ceri appeared and we had nice words before Mike came back and brought all conversation back to gutter level as he chatted her up and teased her. From there we went to the frozen food shop and stocked up on ice lollies.

On the way home to unpack I arranged to meet my niece Karen in Llandudno while Mike visits our friend Brian and his new dog. It’s Karen’s birthday this week and I wanted to get a little gift to her in time. So, after unpacking we were off again. You could tell how nice the weather is from the volume of traffic so the journey was almost an hour. Mike dropped me off in front of another ASDA and left. Plucking up my courage I went inside and headed for the cafe. It was great to see her arrive and the hug was fantastic.Big shock, half a minute later Joanne her sister arrived and I got double the dose. We had lunch and then went round the shops finding a birthday gift for my nephew Lee James. Joanne had to leave to go to work about 2.00 pm but Karen being a veteran shopper stuck with me. Eventually we’d walked as far as we could and I let Mike know I was ready whenever he was. He was there in less than ten minutes. I hugged Karen goodbye and got into Mike’s car. He drove us home. It was about 4.30 pm when we got home. I made Mike a coffee, sat him in front of the TV where football was on and came to look at my mail. It’s as well his ear trumpet wasn’t handy to hear my choice language. I stayed hard at it until 6.45 pm when I needed a break and went through to the lounge. Still  *****y football! I watched a programme with him and was going to come back through at 9.00 pm when I saw the start of an X-Men film so I delayed my start by half an hour. I’ve been at it continuously since then with messages and blog. I hope you’ve all had a good week.

Don’t forget if there’s a particular record you want me to play that shows your taste of means something to you, Shout out.

Be Upstanding

 

Caught Upstanding

Christmas Doings.

Christmas Eve dawned early with a six o’clock awakening of my wife. One bleary eye opened when I announced her cup of tea. ” What time is it ?” she asked. “Getting on for eight” I replied fearing the Wrath of Khan before the tea was drunk. Knowing that for some reason she generally sleeps without a watch helps. The reason for my duplicity was twofold. Firstly, I wanted to get to the shops before they became too crowded and secondly, I wanted to go without the girls having been given playtime or we’d be lucky to get out before ten.

Anyway, by 6.30 we’d made real progress in that the tea was drunk and not thrown at me and Ju was looking much more bright eyed than I’d hoped since she’d been in some pain on the Sunday. By 6.45 we were in the car and on our way. The road was quite busy with people rushing to work or rushing home from the party the night before. It was quite foggy and atmospheric with the lights of approaching cars coming towards us. In the supermarket there were quite a few early shoppers but not enough to worry me. Yes, it’s me that has a thing about crowds….more on that later.

I left Ju to pick up some cigarettes for me and go for a coffee while I shopped. Normally I wouldn’t do so alone in case someone spoke to me but today everyone was conscious of their own needs and getting what they needed before someone emptied the shelves. Not wanting much other than fresh bread, milk , ham and some coleslaw I was ready to head for the tills when I spotted some trifles. I bought one then decided to look at the Christmas puddings and fresh cream. By the time I’d got the extra things and gone to the tills it was eight o’clock. Smiling at the cashier to avoid speaking I paid up, packed the shopping and wheeled the trolley to the MacDonalds where Ju was sitting with coffee. As she saw me approach she tipped her hand asking if I wanted one and I nodded. Reaching the table I asked her to order a bacon roll for me too, I passed her some money then dipped into her bag for my ‘before food’ tablet and sat down to take it. “Brown or red sauce ” she called from the counter. “Brown please” I replied wondering why I bothered since it’s so thinly spread it’s questionable whether it’s really there sometimes..

Ju brought me a latte over and a fresh one for herself since I must have been feeling so generous. The bacon roll arrived, was eaten and for dessert I took my two ‘after food’ torpedoes. Ju asked me the time. “It’s almost 8.15 sweetie” I risked with a smile. “Hmm, we’ve made good time this morning then” I heard and wondered which of the Pantheon of Gods I owed that favour to. We were soon on our way again heading for the trading estate which has a handy pet shop where we could get some treats for the girls. One of my favourite shops is there so I was allowed to look round in case anything new and interesting was in. There wasn’t so we hit the coffee bar where the staff treated us to a latte each before we head for home.

At ten o’clock we were home and had the shopping inside. Unfortunately you reach the kitchen of our home through the lounge and as we entered we were greeted by four wide awake and very hopeful faces from one cage and the sound of frantic activity from the other. I knew what was coming so as Ju removed her coat I put the shopping away. She’d no sooner opened the rats cage than Priya ran down her arm and plunged inside the neckline of her cardigan. Bernie wasn’t far behind preferring to sit on her shoulder and nestle into her neck. Penny and Amy climbed inside one of the tubes in the cage and patiently waited to be lifted out.  Ju put two large picture frames against the degu cage to stop the rats climbing up it and upsetting the degus . They’re not enemies but they certainly don’t get on. If Bernie climbs on to their cage to see them in her friendly way they set up an almighty chittering sound. Anyway, Ju played with the girls on the settee for half an hour as usual and then put them back in their cage where they happily settled down to sleep. Removing the picture frames she then got the degus out one by one and put them into balls. First Poppy then Honey with Mummy degu Saffy last to go. With three balls hurtling round the rooms aiming for your ankles it’s easier if you’re not on your feet. I swear if they catch you a Dick Dastardly snicker comes from them. I beat a hasty retreat to catch up on emails I hadn’t finished earlier. The eventual call of “Sweeties” has the balls tolling back to the lounge so they’re given a sweet before going back in their cage.

The rest of the day was a light lunch, television. emails and an assortment of phone calls before Ju went to bed at 6.30. I was luckier than usual and she went to sleey just the right side of midnight so I was able to turn my computer off and rest myself.

Christmas day I was up at 4am. I answered messages and sent messages of greeting out to friends around the world. At 6am I took Ju’s stocking ( a carrier bag really) and placed it one her bed before going to make a drink. Turning the lounge light on I gave all the animals a sweet and went through to the kitchen. While the kettle boiled I turned the tank light on and fed the fish. I took my meds then made the tea and took them through to Ju to gently wake her. Unusually it didn’t take much. She moved over for me to get in and passed my stocking ( a large sack) to me to open. We always do this together and in the past when Yvonne lived at home or stayed with us she joined us in bed to open her stocking too. There are always fantastic treats and always something funny. One year Ju go me some washing up gloves with a fur trim. This year I’d got her a rubber horse head mask and used bags of her favourite sweets to fill it out. It looked like a scene from the Godfather.

Tradition says we would normally go and have breakfast next before being allowed to open main presents but since Ju can’t face breakfast these days it’s just me. Up went the barriers and out came the girls. When they heard me put cereal (Shreddies) in  a bowl they all rushed to my end of the settee to wait. I sit down gingerly to try and avoid sitting on anyone before the fun starts. Four heads in unison try to get to my bowl first and I have to rush to get a shreddie on the spoon before one of them snatches it off. I usually manage a mouthful in between each of their courses which is usually three each though Bernie only eats one and squirrels the others away behind a cushion for later. Priya usually finds them within minutes.

After both sets have played and been returned to their cages it’s our time. We opened our gifts from Santa , or each other if you like. This took quite a while and was accompanied by lots of Oohs and Aahs. After that it’s time to open gifts from friends and family we won’t see on Christmas day.After each one we phoned or texted our delight. Finally finished Ju collects the wrapping to go for recycling while I make another cuppa and it’s time to get dressed. I show Ju a tee-shirt I printed up with a picture of us both on with wording that says Happiness is Love shaped. I have on new warm socks, new underwear, tee-shirt, new black jeans, black cardigan and black winklepicker cowboy boots with a cuban heel. Suddenly I’m as tall as I used to be. Ju spends some time picking through her finery before settling on a nice outfit and we’re ready to go. Yvonne’s first Christmas as a wife and her first cooking Christmas dinner for us all.

We have a great time at their home swapping and opening presents before settling down to dinner.She’s cooked a small beef joint for me and done my favourite onion sauce with it. For Ju she’s cooked a small lamb joint with her favourite mint sauce and for Ugo and herself she’s done  a 3 bird roast. We wouldn’t normally undertake such a large task but she wanted us all to have our favourites. I struggled to eat a small Christmas pudding afterwards.

A nice couple of days started to go downhill then. Ju was very quiet and excused herself to go to the loo. She was there quite a while and when she eventually rejoined us looked very pale. I asked her quietly what was wrong and found she was in great pain and her bowels were not holding again. We had to go home. Sadly we made our goodbyes saying we wanted to give them plenty of time to travel to Ugo’s family in the Midlands. Fortunately they accepted this. We made our way home where Ju took some fast acting morphine and got into bed. It was about 2 pm by then. There were a couple of trips to the loo early on and I couldn’t persuade her to have a cuppa at all. She lay there watching TV and resting while I worked on emails just occasionally sticking my head in. When I did so at 8 pm she was well away. I turned the TV off, and her light, went back to my room and just listened out for her waking.

I woke Ju at 7.am after eleven hours of solid sleep without waking once.She seemed to be a lot better and got up to see to the varmints. By half eight they were done and dusted and Ju said “Come on then. let’s hit the sales.” After checking I wasn’t hallucinating and she wasn’t running a temperature I ran to the car in case she changed her mind. She hates shopping…..I love it. It was well worth her while though since she got some nice outfits.We we’re home by half eleven though and things still seemed OK. The  rest of the day went well. Today it wasn’t such an early start but the girls were still done by 9 am and Ju was taking me to a different sale. We’d done quite well and got some nice clothes each before we stopped for coffee. As she finished I noticed something wrong and knew it was time to go.We made it home and Ju’s stomach betrayed her again. She’s back in bed. She’s very unhappy at what’s happening though I ask her to remember what the alternative is.Tomorrow I’ll get some imodium and see if it can stop the problem for now though as soon as she takes it there is usually a period of painful constipation. Sometimes the morphine helps and sometimes not with the pain. Her biggest worry is letting herself down in public but I try to say it can’t be helped and she can’t isolate herself on the off chance.That’s no life for anyone.